Advice for a city girl from rural mommas?

I think you will find that in the country kids embrace and play with kids who are of different ages than themselves. Our neighbors today had 5 kids in their pool, ages 4-11, the older kids were helping the younger kids and teaching them things-it was really nice to see actually.
As for adults making friends--well, I'll be honest--I live in the country because I don't particularily want to talk to my neighbors, but it depends on your definition of rural, small town is different than farm country if you know what I mean. We're on over 100 acres, so our neighbors we don't really see that often (although, the first time dh spent the night, I heard about it from my assisstant who keeps her horse 3 farms away from us) So I guess it just depends on what you want to get into. I think with kids, the parents get to know one another. You will find you will likely drive your kids to their friends place more often than now--but that's not the end of the world.

I lived in the city for 11 mos and I hated every second of it, I don't do well without my the deafening silence when I want it (if you can catch it over the noise of singing frogs--they're loud tonight!!)

Siblings do play together when bored! My sister and I were 2 years apart and we played togther when bored bacause the nearest children were several miles away growing up. I don't feel that sadness is common in young rural children, there is so much to do in the country, bugs to look at, places to explore, etc... I do feel that you have to make a bigger effort when they are teenagers, then it becomes more important to them.I plan on doing alot of driving when dd is a teen! some rural counties will have a well known playgroup, story time has been a wonderful way to meet other rural mommas for me, LLL, prettty much the same way you meet mom's in the city. I have always lived in a rural area, except for 6 months when I was 18 I lived in town of 15 thousand, the closest town to me now has a population of 12 hundred, and I have meet a lot of like minded mamas. Good luck.

We moved from a big city to a very rural area a few years ago. We lived out there for 4 years. Dd was only 1 year old when we moved again into a town so I cannot answer the questions about kids.... But I can say that I was scared when we moved out there. You (and I am sure kids) will get over it pretty quick but the first night there I kept hearing movement in the woods right outside our door. I was convinced it was a bear (and it probably was). We actually packed up the cat and spent that first night in a hotel because I wa sin serious culture shock. The next night after we had unpacked the truck and had some familiar things around, the noises were dampened some. By a few months in I was totally used to it and staying there myself when dh was on travel.

We did not have any neighbors close by. We did not really get to know anyone around but somehow word would get back all the way to town (30 miles away) that we had a new wreath on our barn or that we were having our fields mowed. Word travels fast in these kind of areas.

We ended up moving into town because I am a sahm and was going a little nutso not having anyone to talk to ever. But that is the kind of person I am. When I was working full time I really loved the solitude of living out there. It all depends on what you like.

We've moved a zillion times for DH's job. For a while we lived in the country, a little over a hour away from a large city but only about 15 minutes away from a small town (10,000 people). It was beautiful and my kids lived swimming in the river, picking wild berries, and the ease of running errands in the small town. On the down side, there really wasn't anyplace to go or anything to do. The small library didn't do story time, there were no classes or activities for kids their ages anywhere near us. We were over an hour from things like a movie theatre or children's museum or bookstore.

I did meet a few people, but I didn't have much in common with them. My kids didn't make friends with other kids at all, but they did enjoy playing with each other.

Summer was great. We had a blast outside. Winter was really, really horrid. We were pretty far north and covered in snow. I was very isolated and lonely.

Seattle is one of the most expensive cities to live in the US. What about moving to a mid-sized city that is more afordable? There are a lot of options between big city and the country.

We moved to a rural area about 4 months ago from a city. We do have neighbors within our sight but are not very near a town.
There are some things that are an adjustment but we like it for the most part.
What we like best is the space. I love not having people in my face when I walk out my door. We feel safer here too. Not much traffic. The view is better.

Do siblings play together when there's not many other kids around? Do kids in the country get lonely/sad/depressed?
I have an only child so I can't answer about siblings. My 5 year old dd actually seems much happier where we live now. My dd loves our house. She loves the huge yard space. She likes the critters we encounter (deer, ground squirrels, birds, bugs). She doesn't care about playing with other kids very much. I think she sleeps better at night because it is quieter. We hear crickets and frogs at night. During the day we can really hear the birds. (You could always try a white noise machine or something if it is too quiet at night) We have night lights so it isn't really pitch black. We are watching much less TV.
I think it depends more on the child's personality if they get lonely or depressed. You can certainly involve your children in things still. My sister lives on a farm in another state and has her boys in school and takes them to activities in the summer (swimming lessons, basketball camp, library, church). The same kids from school are in the other activities generally. I think they are pretty happy kids. They seem to like where they live.

My kids'll be three years apart- is that too far apart for them to be friends?
I was pretty good friends growing up with my sister who was 3 years older. It may not happen but it certainly isn't impossible.

How do adults make friends in the middle of nowhere?
I'm still figuring that one out! I think it is a little harder to find places to get to know people if you don't attend a church or work. I made contact with a woman in my region through the internet who has lived here longer and said there really aren't playgroups and stuff like that around here. The parks and libraries are some distance away from us but I suppose if we had a regular day and time we went to one we might meet people more. If we joined a church or other group we'd probably meet more people.

Has anyone around made a move from city to rural? What challenges did you face? Was it worth it? Challenges- getting used to driving some distance for everything, stores closing earlier, not as much diversity, no competition for some stores and services so if you don't like it is just tough luck, lack of certain services in our area (not all isp's have access numbers for our area, our cell phone won't work here, we have no TV reception without cable or satellite, no public transportation), and a really big yard to mow. I think walking outside at night was a little scary at first because it was really dark compared to the city. We walked out to look at the fireflies the other night. There were a ton of them just rising up out of the grass. It wasn't scary anymore.

I grew up in a rural area and now we live in one....and I agree that the definition of "rural" can be pretty broad - from no neighbors for miles to living in the middle of a small town.

Do siblings play together when there's not many other kids around? Do kids in the country get lonely/sad/depressed? Where I grew up, lots of sibs played together, but there were also lots of other kids to play with. My only sib is 8 yrs younger than me, so we didn't play together much. As for being lonely/sad/depressed...well, those are all different things to me! I think kids get bored/lonely at times no matter where they live. Not sure what you mean about the sad and depressed part.

My kids'll be three years apart- is that too far apart for them to be friends? I hope not - mine will be 3 years apart too!

How do adults make friends in the middle of nowhere? Lol. We're not in the middle of nowhere, so maybe I'm not the right person to answer...but we do live on the outskirts of a small town. We've made friends mostly through kid-oriented stuff - playgroups, storytimes - but also just by meeting our neighbors (most of whom also have small kids) and getting involved in other stuff. There's a ton going on here, which may be unusual for a rural area - there are always book groups, classes, theatre stuff, etc. I also met some great people through LLL meetings.

Has anyone around made a move from city to rural? What challenges did you face? Was it worth it? We moved here (a town of about 3,500 in Vermont, where the closest city of more than 100K people is Montreal, 1.5 hours away) from Baltimore. We lived in Baltimore 7 years; before that, we lived in Minneapolis. Because I grew up in a small town (though it had a WAY different flavor from where we live now), it was actually a relief for me to get out of the city. I miss the museums and theater, but really, how often did we really go to those when we could? (Especially now that we have one child and one on the way.) I was more worried about DH, since he'd lived in Mpls for 25 years, but he loves it out here too.

Now granted, there's HUGE diversity in rural areas, just as there is between cities, or even within the same city. Vermont is pretty much rural throughout, and has the New England mindset that I love (people stay out of your business but will help you out if you need it, and we all work together to solve problems). I don't think I would be as happy in, say, rural Iowa.

DO kids all get scared when they move to the country? I was terrified when we moved to the suburbs from NYC as a child (9) because it was so dark and so quiet. It took a while to get over that.I know I had a hard time falling asleep when I first moved to a city, because it was loud, and then when we moved here I had problems because it was so quiet! I was an adult then, though, so I'm not sure how a child would react - probably they will all react a bit differently.

For you country momma's- I must sound crazy- it's just that in my youth I could move around at my whim, I don't want to relocate then change my mind. Nothing wrong with changing your mind! I would give it at least a year if you do move, though. I was having a change of heart after about 2 months, but it disappeared and hasn't come back since. I can't imagine moving back to a city. I feel freer out here and feel like my kids will be able to explore, be outside a lot and still learn about the "larger" world through trips to Montreal, Boston, etc. But then I didn't grow up in a city so I can't imagine what that would have been like.

HTH!

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Being from big cities, I always imagine that between the city and the country is nothing but miles and miles and miles of suburbia. I'm not a fan of suburbia- having only lived there during my adolescence.

But yes there are lots of places to live and I'm only starting to consider them all.

Thanks

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ROFL! Where you live right now that is true, but in smaller cities it is different. The in the burbs of a small city, you are few minutes from downtown or the country. Shopping, the library, etc are all really close. You can go downtown all that you want because there isn't much traffic and parking is cheap.

My DH and I were urban folks before we had our second child. Now we really like having a decent sized house that we can afford on one income, a large fenced backyard, and a quiet street for our kids to ride their bikes.

I always thought that I would like living in the country, but it wasn't for me. I'm glad we did it though. Until I had the experience I would have always wondered.