Mothering Forum banner
1 - 15 of 15 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
27,052 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·

Chatting with some total mainstreamers just now. Highlights:
"I'm 37 weeks and need to go into labor in 9 days so I can have a VBAC."
"I almost had a natural birth, but at 8cm they were talking c-section so I had to have the meds."
"I was induced at 37 weeks because of hypertension, pitocin contractions sure hurt, and I pushed for 2 1/2 hours, pushing was the hardest thing ever"

The *one* good thing, was that a lady at 32 weeks was asking for reassurance about labor and I was able to tell her that from reading lots of birth stories easier labors happen when you can move around and when you don't have directed pushing. I also told her to look up "fetus ejection reflex" which might direct her towards some good info. I prefaced it by saying that my opinion might be different than other people's because I'd been reading on natural birth and she told me to please share.


Whew. I feel better now. I just wanted to say "WHY THE F*** ARE YOUR CARE PROVIDERS SO F******* IMPATIENT!!!!" But I think I might be chatting with some of these people in the future and most groups aren't as tolerant of people who don't have kids yet.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
788 Posts
Isn't it crazy? Sometimes I forget just how little most people know about birth. Then, of course, I read or hear something that abruptly brings me back to reality.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
27,052 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
The worse part is I feel like I know very little. I mean, I've been reading on the topic for *years* and I still learn more every day. The second worst part is these are people with internet access, they *could* learn this stuff.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,268 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Chatting with some total mainstreamers just now. Highlights:
"I'm 37 weeks and need to go into labor in 9 days so I can have a VBAC."
"I almost had a natural birth, but at 8cm they were talking c-section so I had to have the meds."
"I was induced at 37 weeks because of hypertension, pitocin contractions sure hurt, and I pushed for 2 1/2 hours, pushing was the hardest thing ever"

The *one* good thing, was that a lady at 32 weeks was asking for reassurance about labor and I was able to tell her that from reading lots of birth stories easier labors happen when you can move around and when you don't have directed pushing. I also told her to look up "fetus ejection reflex" which might direct her towards some good info. I prefaced it by saying that my opinion might be different than other people's because I'd been reading on natural birth and she told me to please share.


Whew. I feel better now. I just wanted to say "WHY THE F*** ARE YOUR CARE PROVIDERS SO F******* IMPATIENT!!!!" But I think I might be chatting with some of these people in the future and most groups aren't as tolerant of people who don't have kids yet.

The worse part is I feel like I know very little. I mean, I've been reading on the topic for *years* and I still learn more every day. The second worst part is these are people with internet access, they *could* learn this stuff.
sapphire_chan,

and
, but those people would never learn about this stuff no matter what it takes.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,011 Posts
I totally understand where you're coming from. Try working in an LC office and every day you can count on two fingers who had a vaginal birth. Most of the ladies have c-secs and it's basically due to being induced or having that blasted epidural. Then they don't know why their milk takes 5 days to come in after they've had their baby either cut out or pulled out with forceps or vacuum and didn't put their baby to breast. Then they don't understand why they're so sleepy. It's from the DRUGS!!! That and the over stimulation from being scrubbed by the nurse, stuck with a few needles and then separated from their mothers. It's heartbreaking!! Thank God for homebirth!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,268 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by kJad29
I totally understand where you're coming from. Try working in an LC office and every day you can count on two fingers who had a vaginal birth. Most of the ladies have c-secs and it's basically due to being induced or having that blasted epidural. Then they don't know why their milk takes 5 days to come in after they've had their baby either cut out or pulled out with forceps or vacuum and didn't put their baby to breast. Then they don't understand why they're so sleepy. It's from the DRUGS!!! That and the over stimulation from being scrubbed by the nurse, stuck with a few needles and then separated from their mothers. It's heartbreaking!! Thank God for homebirth!!!
kjad29,

and I see that all the time while I volunteer in the Maternity Department at the local hospital by me and it drives me nuts with when I see the babies in the nursery just after they are born or when their mother is taking a shower or something else or in the warmer, if they there temp isn't stable or getting photo treatment if their jaundice levels aren't up to where they should be, or whatever else you can think of with this.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,110 Posts
so sad....
a friend of mine upon learning of my natural homebirth stated she hopes they have her epi ready now( she is not pg, married or planning children) is this her fault- or our societies- and women in particular for letting our strength and wisdom be robbed by the medical profession? By not passing down thru to the future generations that birth is not just something one must go thru to have a child- but to be a celebration of life and motherhood?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,268 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by Emilie
so sad....
a friend of mine upon learning of my natural homebirth stated she hopes they have her epi ready now( she is not pg, married or planning children) is this her fault- or our societies- and women in particular for letting our strength and wisdom be robbed by the medical profession? By not passing down thru to the future generations that birth is not just something one must go thru to have a child- but to be a celebration of life and motherhood?
Emiliie,

: , on your friend reaction to your homebirth and what she wants for her birth/s. I'm in the same boat as her, but I'm the opposite of her with this since I came here last year.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,738 Posts
Quote:
"I was induced at 37 weeks because of hypertension, pitocin contractions sure hurt, and I pushed for 2 1/2 hours, pushing was the hardest thing ever"
Ummm, why is this being lumped into the same category as the other examples?

This can be a very valid reason for a medically necessary induction. I don't understand your disgust at this?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
27,052 Posts
Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Samjm
Ummm, why is this being lumped into the same category as the other examples?

This can be a very valid reason for a medically necessary induction. I don't understand your disgust at this?
Because she made no mention of attempts to reduce the hypertension even though she'd been sharing all sorts of other intimate details. Think about it, if you had to get induced for hypertension at 37, wouldn't you at least say something about how you wished that things could have gone to term? And probably something about how you're going to do things to try to avoid hypertension with your next pregnancy? Yeah, that one could have been necessary, it was more the feel of the presentation that got me.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,738 Posts
OK, see I was induced for hypertension at 37.5 weeks, after being on strict hospital bedrest for 3 weeks, and on blood pressure meds. Even with all that my blood pressure was so high I almost started having seizures. At 37.5 weeks we decided that it would be safer for all concerned if baby was born.

Of course I wish things had gone differently, and of course we tried to reduce the hypertension in other ways, but when I'm talking about my experiences I kind of assume that people would know that already.

I do sort of see your point, but by dismissing her comments without further explanation, you were doing exactly the same thing you think she was doing.

Peace
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
27,052 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
In this case, the stuff about pushing made me feel that it was more likely that the induction was not as medically necessary as it could have been, but I really shouldn't assume. The thing that made me add that info to the list of Arrrrgghhh was the 2 1/2 hours of pushing. With a pitocin drip she probably wasn't free to choose her positions, which contributed to the lengthy pushing. Also with pushing that long, it's probable that she and the baby weren't actually ready and that she was being coached to push just because her cervix was at 10 cm.

With the horror stories around here I tend to assume that trying other solutions is something that gets pushed by smart mamas and aren't standard practices in hospitals.
Thanks for giving me the true info on that.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
975 Posts
I have been thinking of being forced to push alot lately. I was induced and all that other terrible crap last time (hence the u/c now, among other things I am informed, I was not then) anyways, I was told when and for how long to push, yet I never once felt the urge. (no pain meds, or rather it didnt take)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
27,052 Posts
Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I went back.

"My aunt is a L&D nurse and says that to her patients all the time." In response to someone quoting the 'Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy' talking about the "no one gives you a medal for laboring without drugs" crap.

So I just didn't respond.

What I wanted to respond: And that kind of dismissive unsupportive BS is *EXACTLY* why I will *NEVER* give birth in a hospital. Maybe if people like your aunt kept their big yaps shut more women *would* be able to have drug-free births.

Whew, that feels better, I couldn't say it there, but I had to say it somewhere. Ah, well, maybe someone else will see my comment about reading about empowerment in birth and birth hormones and go on to have a better experience than otherwise.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,340 Posts
Just keep putting the info out there for as long as you can stand it. And then when you start to go crazy come on back to MDC.

If it weren't for an MDCer I would be over on the *other side* still. She didn't get through to me until after I had my elective induction with epidural (which didn't work even a tiny bit btw), after I circ'd my son, after I supplemented with formula because it was easier than NIP to me, etc, etc. But you know what? Finally it all got through to me! It took this lady over a year of posting on our mainstream board and everyone always getting mad at her for telling us these "radical ideas." But suddenly I saw the light. It's hard to come to that realization because you have to accept that you made bad decisions. I think everyone has the ability to change though. Thanks to that lady (I lost track of her a long while ago...Ingrid are you out there??) any future babies of mine will be homebirthed, ebf, intact, etc.
 
1 - 15 of 15 Posts
Top