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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
what i mean by this is, she'll ask for juice, then when i say, "do you want juice?"

cry cry cry--"no juice! no juice, mama!"

then i ask, "so you don't want juice?"

*nods* "yes, juice, juice, juice please!"

so i give her the juice and it's 50/50 whether she'll say "thank you" and drink it, or smack the cup and scream, NO JUICE!

she does this with lots of things...a certain toy or activity, foods, etc. she claims to want it, then gets mad when she get it and claims not to want it, back and forth. this is VERY frustrating for me and leads to lots of wasted food, which she claims to want then gets mad about.

any idea if this is just a phase, or what i can do to deal with it? is it normal?
 

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it sounds like she is 2.
just give her what she asks for, and put no focus or weight on it.
when she asks for juice, i would say "ok, i am getting your juice" instead of asking.
but the flip-flopping is jsut part of her figuring out the world. this shall pass.
 

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I am also commiserating. Two things have worked pretty well. I started minimizing how many questions I was asking her about a particular request. I think I was confusing her. I just get something for her. If she's flip-flopping, I say something like, "It's hard to pick which one you want. They both look good." She can now verbalize that. When I offer a choice she'll say, "Hard! Hard to pick!" It seems to lower the frustration for her because I validate how hard she's working. At least this is what I think is happening.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mama2Bean View Post
I am also commiserating. Two things have worked pretty well. I started minimizing how many questions I was asking her about a particular request. I think I was confusing her. I just get something for her. If she's flip-flopping, I say something like, "It's hard to pick which one you want. They both look good." She can now verbalize that. When I offer a choice she'll say, "Hard! Hard to pick!" It seems to lower the frustration for her because I validate how hard she's working. At least this is what I think is happening.

thanks, both replies are really helpful. i'll try to just respond affirmatively when she asks instead of asking her to repeat herself. sometimes it's just hard to know for sure what she said, kwim? but i'll try this!
 

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I read a little bit of the book "Your two year old" and it says the exact same thing, and that it is normal for this age. It's like they are not quite confident yet in their choices or something like that.
Mine did that too, I think it has slowed down a lot though and he doesn't do it as much (almost 3yo).
 
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