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I have 4 children who are 5, 4, 2, and 1 year old. My 3 oldest children have birthdays in the next 3 months, so they will be 6, 5, and 3 by early January, and my youngest will be 2 come June.

I thought I was DONE having children after my little girl was born (my 3 oldest are boys). My husband and I were almost 90% set on him getting the snip, but after a pregnancy scare last month, I'm not so sure (and neither is he!) any more!

FOUR kids is a lot, so what am I doing thinking about a FIFTH? They drive me crazy sometimes! I am a stay at home, home-schooling mama. I want to pull my hair out often! But they're so wonderful, and loving, and fill my heart with complete joy!

I have been breastfeeding non-stop since I had my oldest in 2010 (tandem feeding too), have had 2 premature babies, and been on weekly progesterone injections during THREE of my pregnancies. Pregnancy for me is a PAIN in the butt (literally!). It's stressful and worrying (but I LOVE growing a baby, and feeling him/her kick and wriggle, etc).

But here I am, thinking of being pregnant again, and having a newborn baby... :eek:

Someone knock some sense into me?! :grin: :laugh:
 

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Possibly but that means we are even crazier. We have 13, 11, and 9 and are considering 1 more in a few years.
 

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I read a study once that said something like this:

Having 1 kids is hard.
Having 2 kids is harder.
Having 3 kids is hardest of all.
Having 4 kids is easier than only having 1.
Having additional kids after 4 makes no difference at all.

I think it's probably true, because once you can handle being outnumbered with 3 kids, it just gets easier after that because by then you're a pro. Plus the oldest siblings can start helping a little with the youngest.
 

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I am feeling this way as well! I have four boys and love them so much. We homeschool. It is tough already some days to get everything done. They are 11, 8, 5, and 3. I am 36 years old now. I've had adrenal fatigue in the past, which probably isn't all the way resolved and I don't want to backslide. My oldest has some possible medical problems which need extra help sometimes. I have rough pregnancies and takes me a long time to feel back to normal. My husband gets terribly neglected usually because of attachment parenting. If we had another I'm thinking I would have to change some of that anyway because I need to pay more attention to homeschooling my older children. I don't know what I'm thinking.....I'm not even sure if it would be best for us as a family, but I can't get it out of my head! There's about a million reasons why four is enough. I just can't get over thinking.....another whole person could exist or not based on this decision! I think it's hard to decide you're done having babies.
 

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Having 1 child or 5 children doesn't make any difference, if you are able to taken care of them well. But always consider your financial, physical and mental status. After all, more kids needs more love and care. Hope this helps you.
 

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That is a gift of life to you, my dear. The child in your womb now has a role in this world that is why he/she is about to be born. Stay healthy and good luck!
 

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On the one hand, having multiple kids might make you more efficient. One 2014 study found that, over a 30-year career, mothers outperformed women without children, and mothers with at least two kids were the most productive of all
 

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hi

Every child is a gift. That child in your womb as of now has a mission to complete in this world. It is actually very nice to have many children because it fills the house with love and care. When they grow up, you will miss your babies.
 

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It is a really big family! You should be proud of yourself! Fifth child too, well it is a really challenge! hahahaah If you are in real good financial situation, then don´t worry that much. Yes, it will suck every ounce of energy out of you, but think of it as a blessing. How many of us would like to have one, not to mention 5? :grin: Enjoy your big family, one day you will be proud grandma with a bunch of grandchildren! God, I envy you! hahahaha All the best to you and your big family!
 

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Hey lucky girl! I can't stop myself from saying this that you are lucky enough with very fertile luck lols. You are enjoying your life with your four kids that sound so satisfying but now be ready for one more musketeer because for a mother all kids are same. Welcome him or her to positive vibes. And Good luck.
 

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Hi there. Having a child is such a joy. So, I wouldn't say you are crazy. However, you need to think this through. Can you handle the responsibility of another baby? Having one more might prove to be too much. It can impact your relation to your other 4 kids. Good luck!
 

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Homeschooling mom of four, 18 years farther down the road than you. Mine are now 23, 21, 19 and 14 and I agree that the increment to the parenting workload gets less as you get more than 3 kids, and once the oldest reaches age 6 or 7 and can be an extra set of hands and eyes that helps too. I will however just gently remind you that kids can get very expensive during their teens, and I wonder if this isn't especially true for homeschooled teens. My husband and I are fairly well-off and very frugal, and we were able to put away a fair bit of money for our kids when they were young. My kids have always worked jobs (full-time summers, part-time during school) to help fund their own educations, but even so it is a huge stretch for our family. We are very stretched right now.

Miranda
 

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You're not crazy at all! As you well know, children require an immense amount of time, effort, and resources, but the joy they give us is off the charts. If you truly believe you are ready for another child, then go for it! Do what makes you happy, no need to have use convince you to do otherwise! :)
 

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Well, I think you should really have a little normality sense of yourself. Because there is no family planning there..... I've 0 kids. All I want is one and I'm going through an IVF for it.
Family planning is not just short-hand for contraception: it means pro-actively planning your family size and the timing of pregnancies. Which is exactly what the original poster is doing, and casting a wide net for input from real parents in the trenches, in similar living situations.

I know that as someone dealing with infertility it must be emotionally difficult for you to see posts from people trying to decide between 4 children or more. I'd like to gently suggest that you just don't read or respond. First, it would save you the frustration and jealousy. Second, your response is not helpful. "Four kids are really enough for a women" is a simplistic unfounded comment for someone who clearly doesn't feel four is enough for her, especially when you have no experience and are giving no supporting arguments or evidence on why five is too many.

Miranda
 
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