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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Sometimes I feel like the only mama out there that is gaining "too much" weight...I guess I just pack it on when pg. And believe me, it's everywhere. I've read so many posts lately of ladies that haven't gained enough, and it gets me down. (This is such a horrible cultural stigma, y'know?- it seem like I've spent my entire life dieting) Anyway, I know I'm going to get weighed at my appt. today and am not looking forward to the results. Any suggestions on straightening my fool head out?
 

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Every body does what it needs to do.<br>
End of story.<br><br>
An Aunt of mind ALWAYS gained 60-70 pounds (and this was during the 80's) by the end of her pregnancy. She had 3 kids total, so by the 3rd she really knew what to expect. Her kids were also good size. She also nursed each of her babies until 1 1/2 or so. She lost 95% of the weight each time and was quite happy with that. Even today she loves the curves that motherhood gave her.<br><br>
You didn't say how far along you are, so it's hard to gear this specifically to your point in pregnancy. Edited to say: Oh, yeah, sig file. Read it, Claire! So you're in 2nd trimester. I think having morning sickness vs. having it and being able to eat vs. not having morning sickness really affects your 2nd trimester weight total. It's hard to gain a lot if you're not eating. And, it's very easy to gain when you feel good enough to eat. Some of the other women's totals probably include the loss from the 1st trimester. They may be trying to gain it back still.<br><br>
Also, if you are on the thin side to begin with then you NEED to gain more weight. I don't know if you're on the thin side, but then you really would need to gain more than the average woman.<br><br>
Peace!
 

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Hey Krolissa!<br><br>
check out:<a href="http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?s=&threadid=71859&highlight=obsess+weight" target="_blank">this thread</a>. Hopefully it will make you feel better! There are many more in your boat!<br><br>
FWIW, I think theres only so much you can control about your body while you're pregnant. Are you eating healthy foods and getting some exercise? As long as you're doing those two things, I think you're doing fine. Your body will decide how much it needs to gain for a healthy baby. And not everyone gets just the perfectly round little basketball in front (in fact, the only people I know that look like that when pregnant are actors on tv who aren't pg at all!). When you get pregnant, your whole body gets pregnant--especially your butt, thighs and ankles. Probably your face too. People just never talk about it.<br><br>
Anyway, congrats on your pregnancy! You're going to have a lovely, healthy baby who breastfeeds like crazy to help you get back your girlish figure (if you want it--you may very well fall in love with your new sexy curves!)<br><br>
peace, Beth
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">FWIW, I think theres only so much you can control about your body while you're pregnant.</td>
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ITA! With my son I gained a TON of weight and got really mentally down about it for about 3 years. I thought it was because I had no self-control, yadda yadda, I blamed myself to no end. I let the stupid "you should gain 25-35 pounds" notion ruin me.<br><br>
This pregnancy I have had a fabulous diet, I very rarely indulge and certainly no more than I did pre-pregnancy. I have not given myself a license to eat non-stop and you know what? My entire body is still pregnant, especially my thighs. This is just the way I am and it is different from the way everyone else is. I am not destined to be a pregnant woman who wears size 6 maternity jeans and that is ok, it has to be ok because there is nothing I can do to change it.<br><br>
I do what I can, I exercise, I eat well and I wear clothes I think I look cute in. I'm building a baby and I have no more control over how my body does that than I do over when this baby is coming out, KWIM? I'm simply along for the ride.<br><br>
I'll tell you what really helps: Not being weighed. My midwives know I won't step on the scale, they don't harass me about it, and I have no idea how much I have gained. If you can't avoid the scale altogether you can certainly ask not to be told how much you weigh and refuse to discuss it with your practitioner. Then you won't concentrate on the numbers, I swear.<br><br>
Amy
 

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Your body is doing what it needs to do to nourish your baby! Most of the posts I've seen about losing or not gaining weight have been mamas with lots of ms. I have already gained 5 lbs (at 11-13 weeks or so). I gained over 50 with dd, and just under 50 with ds. And i gained it ALL over. I was a big mama. My sister was the same way, and i know several others mamas that were the same, too. Maybe you could just not look at the scale. And don't worry about it! Eat when you need to, just try to keep it healthy and nutritous.
 

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I htink every woman and every pregnancy is different.<br><br>
My first pregnancy i gained only 14. Everyone was worried. I was made to keep a food journal, and they were in shock at how much I consumed. They toldme I'd be lucky if the baby was 7lbs. He was 8lb 9 oz. The next 2 pregnancies were similar. Now this one, by 5 months I'd gained over 20 lbs, I thought uh-oh.... But the OB wasn't at all concerned. Now in the last 2 months I've not added any weight, and again....I thought, somethings wrong. And the Dr is fine with it, she said the baby is growing good, she's going to be a big one.lol.. and that is why I'm not gaining. I eat but have no real appetite, so baby gets most of it.<br><br>
Now my mom was different than me. She is 4'10" and with each pregnancy she gained 70lbs + can you imagine? Id love to have seen her..lol. But she lost it all within a year or so.<br><br>
Some people just gain different. Those that don't do much gaining are often the unfortunate ones that are ill for much of their pregnancy. I'd not fret.
 

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With ds, I didn't watch what I ate at all--I kind of let pregnancy give me a license to eat whatever I wanted. This time I have been so much more careful, eating nutritiously, etc. And this time I have gained more weight!!! I agree with everyone else, your body just does what it needs to do, and it's just how you carry.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks for the replies, ladies.<br>
After I posted this, I've looked inside myself all day, and am trying to figure out why I am so testy about my weight. I didn't care with my DS, meaning I ate healthily, but I wasn't worried at all about losing it after he was born. I lost all of the weight I gained, plus 20 lbs.<br>
I think the real issue isn't just being "fat" pre- or postpartum. What is different with this pregnancy? I have made the huge lifestyle change of giving up a very high paced career and staying home with my son. I love it, but I think I have lost my identity (career) and am focusing on other parts of my self (appearance) for backup.<br><br>
This is a real light bulb moment for me. Figuring this out can help me absorb all of your beautiful words and take them to heart. I have some work to do.
 

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Krolissa, fwiw, I have also struggled with "giving up" the fast-paced career and paycheck to stay home with my kids. the extreme shift in gears has been difficult for me, but like you I do love staying home, and I'm working on it!
 
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