I'm sharing this as a way to vent instead of describing it all, I figure the email is self-explanitory. My kids dad just left today for a trip to California, For "about a month" with his girlfriend. He's a big jerk:
Oh yeah hey, don't worry about us. Everything's fine. No, no, really, I don't need any extra money for babysitting etc. the $280 on my paycheck is more than enough for everything. And, what with the $300 I might get from the maintanence people, we'll be rolling in it. It's much more important that you have enough for your vacation.
I'll just buy **** a new hat. That's fine. Actually I guess he should buy it since, as you say, he's the one that lost it eh?
I find peace knowing that you'll be back...sometime... and that I can get ahold of you anytime, via email that you might check, if there's an emergency, say, another midnight trip to the hospital. Just knowing you're out there somewhere with your calm and patient strength helps me rest a little easier. It's good to know my worries about doing this on my own are met with such mature understanding. You are truly a prince among men.
Oh, and the cervical cancer scare I'm going through? I'm sure it's nothing. I can easily take the kids with me for vaginal exams, after-all that's where they came from anyway eh?
I'm reassured knowing that you will put aside the money for next months daycare fees while you're somewhere between here and....well....wherever it is that you're going. And the maintanence people, I'm sure will have no trouble garnishing a check that you won't be getting since you're not here. I can just point to a map of the world when the kids ask where you are.
I hope you're having fun. The important thing, afterall, is that you're having a good time, right? Whew! It must have been a relief to get away from all this responsibility eh?
ps. Although I fully support you going away, (as I've said from the get-go, not that you actually asked or anything), it's your cavalier approach and your absolute disregard for any worries or reservations that I may have had. Not to mention your assholish behaviour, when a simple "thanks a lot " would have sufficed. I guess responding to this email, would really put a cramp on your good times though, so thanks for letting me get this off my chest. I'll just fill you in on what you missed whenever you return.