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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I get very very annoyed on those very very rare occasions when my kids' deadbeat dad actually spends time with them. I am rationally happy that my kids see him and know that he's still alive, but inside I feel HUGELY annoyed. I know the kids will see him next week for the first time after three months and I already feel overwhelmed by the feeling of 'too little too late'. Any one else feel this too? Any insight on how to process it?
 

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I think that's pretty normal! I hope so at least :) My kids dad is around a lot more than yours, but less than he should be, and it does make me mad when he gets credit for doing the bare minimum-basically just showing up.

I'm glad for the kids when he acts more interested and involved, but it is so frustrating to see them getting soooooo excited about daddy coming to a baseball game or dance recital, or whatever, when I'm the one who did the work of signing them up, paying for it, taking them to practices, getting the correct uniforms, etc. (which I"m happy to do!) But in the long run, it's better to be the parent whose presence is taken for granted :)

It is also hard to be happy about somebody finally showing up when you know that person's presence and then absence affects your kids so strongly and negatively.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks Greenemami, my feelings exactly.
Today was the day they spent with him, and after the initial' annoyance' of the exchnage I enjoyed my first day without kids since mid-January and it was amazingly productive!
 
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