[Finch]

So we took ds to Costco this evening, had to get some stuff. Normally we carry him in the sling, backpack, or ergo. Well, we didn't have that stuff with us (don't ask), so we put him in the cart, and I got him a snack hoping feeding him would keep him happy in the cart. No dice.

Huge freakout. He bit the hell out of dh. People staring. I was just waiting for someone to say something. I took ds to the car (carrying him OVER MY SHOULDER, flailing and screaming) while dh paid for our stuff.

I was calm in the store, but I had soooooooo much anxiety and could just feel those eyes boring holes through me. It sucked.

I internalize so much crap that I need to just let roll off my back. Bleah. I came home and had a glass of wine.

:

 

[williamsmommy2002]

I have been there several times. We don't take my 3.5 year old ds to the store much anymore. I got too sick of the stares and he is much calmer now that he's not in those situations.

 

[~*SugarMama*~]

Sometimes, I just want to wear a sign on my back that states "My DD has sensory issues. Please do not try to teach me how to better parent her". It really irks me when people stare like that. Not the ones that look like they want to help you but not sure how to approach but the ones that glare at you like they cannot believe that your child acts that way in public.

 

[jessielove]

Maybe it's the overwhelmingly big nature of Costco. My 7 1/2 year old had a major meltdown at Costco several weeks ago. A screaming-for-three-hours meltdown. A meltdown so extreme that as I was standing with him off to the side, holding his hands to keep him from hurting himself or someone else and talking to him quietly as he raged at me, hoping to get him calm enough to get him out to the car {he is way too big for me to carry} two Costco employees, including what I believe was a security guard, came over because they thought I might be beating or kidnapping him.

You are not alone.

I wish there was some way to deflect the boring stares and the evil eye coming from other people. Rarely are those stares kind or sympathetic. They hurt. People don't realise how much they hurt.

 

[gsdmama]

We've had our share of public meltdowns with ds. Especially now that he's 5 years old, I get a lot of the "Isn't he too old to be behaving like that?" looks in the store. I wish people were more understanding.

 

[rbear4]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gsdmama We've had our share of public meltdowns with ds. Especially now that he's 5 years old, I get a lot of the "Isn't he too old to be behaving like that?" looks in the store. I wish people were more understanding.

Finally at 10 the looks are more understanding. I think folks finally figure out that his behavior isn't just bratty. I still do get some nasty looks I think, I just don't notice them anymore.

On the good side, the meltdowns are much better in the last year or so finally. But I definitely understand and I hate when things get like that. But he still has the ocassional outburst or will get overstimulated and act just plain weird.

That was our trip to costco yesterday, weird, hyper and worth loads of stares. The movie we wanted to go to had the wrong time listed online so we couldn't go. Instead we decided to give the kids a treat then go to costco. Last week of vaca and all and wanted them to have a fun couple days. There were no smoothie places around and made the mistake of giving them an ice cream. My boys, ice cream and costco DON"T MIX! I am sure I got my fair share of looks but oh well. A good reminder why I don't give hte kids sugar typically.

Renee

 

[Finch]

Y'know, I was thinking about the whole thing last night, and I think you're right, it is something about Costco. So big and bright, and ds has a freaky thing about big open spaces...DUH....why didn't I translate that into stores too?

He never freaks at the grocery (or rarely does) and sits in the cart with a toy and a snack and does fine. I guess it's got lower ceilings and is smaller and less imposing than Costco.

 

[jessielove]

I think it's the same for my boys, Finch. They both get overwhelmed at Costco. They're not great shakes at the regular grocery, but Costco is a real stressor for them, especially Nate. It might be that the store is just so BIG, the ceilings are high, the aisles are huge, the whole place just screams BIG. I think that's what overwhelms my boys about it, anyways. I love shopping there but not when they're with me.

They had the same reaction with WalMart when we shopped there. The WalMart here is a SuperCenter and huge. Not quite as big as Costco, but it has high ceilings, over bright lighting, and is rather overwhelming to the senses. It's also often crowded, and neither of my sons does well with large groups of people around.

It's fascinating {and often frusterating} how something like this can elude us for awhile and then suddenly click. Sometimes I wish there were a manual written for each child telling us exactly what makes them tick, what triggers them and when. Unfortunately there isn't a manual, we just have to figure all of this out on our own. Talking with others can be so helpful sometimes, because we can pool our thoughts and find things that are similar, helping us to make that connection faster. [/rambling]