[b_light]

My newly 4 year old still has some poop issues. They are slowly working themselves out, but that is important background information to help explain my confidence.<br><br>
With my daughter, I started EC in the early months part time. We have worked our way up to wearing underwear at home, pul trainers or cloth diapers while out, and she's started verbally saying "puh" for potty. She signs it also, but as her fine motor control is that of an 11 month old, it's hard to distinguish from waving or just regular baby flailing. By the way, what types of cues do your babies purposefully give you?<br><br>
Anyway, I have not shared with anyone locally that I've been doing this with her. I'm particularly nervous to mention it to my mom who has "politely" blamed my son's potty troubles with my starting him too soon (at 15 months, then took a hiatus until 2--I feel like I may have introduced it at a less than useful time for him, but not neccessarily "early", just in the midst of him striving for control over himself).<br><br>
But my mother watches her for 3 hours every Monday. I've just sent her cloth diapers and not said a thing. But I think that it may soon (if not already) will interfere, confuse, or even anger her.<br><br>
Any tips for this or anyone else who has similar problems to commiserate?

 

[Vivien57]

<p>Everyone I seem to read writing about EC says part time is fine. I think she will just associate you to EC and your mom to diapers. I think it will be fine to just plan to say nothing to your mom for now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I told my parents, and my mom mentioned it at bridge. It turned out two of her 10 bridge friends had done EC with their kids! One knowing about it from India, and the other had her baby train her in EC and be 100% potty trained by 1 year old.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Good luck whatever you decide to do.</p>

 

[b_light]

Thanks for replying!<br><br>
I think, had this been my first or if potty learning went smoothly before, I would not hesitate to tell the whole world. As it is though, potty learning did not go swimmingly with my son so I fear my mother's (and other's who I haven't explicitly asked for help) "helpful" advice. When really, I could use advice and/or support, I'm just picky about what type I get. <img alt="wink1.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/wink1.gif"><br><br>
I suppose what I really need is a thicker skin. <img alt="wink1.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/wink1.gif"><br><br>
Anyhow, I did "break the news" to her, sorta, the other day when she stopped by my house. She picked the baby up and she was wearing underwear and pants and I knew it was close to the time I usually take her potty. I decided to give her a friendly warning that the baby wasn't wearing a diaper. I softened the blow (for myself) by explaining that she has dry skin/eczema on her bottom and it looked like it would be painful to sit in pee. Without a diaper, I could know right away and change her. I just left it at that.

 

[amdvorak]

<p>I am a total closet ECer. We do it a little more than part time with cloth and disposable diapers for back up. I have told my family who originally thought I was nuts but now is pretty impressed. My DD is 6 months and we have been practicing EC since she was 3 months. The past two months have been great! And I havn't changed a dirty poop diaper in the last 4 weeks. It is amazing. I think I will keep it to myself though for a while longer. My friends who have kids gave me the eye roll when I was reading the book while pregnant. And I think I would rather have them ask. Sometimes I feel like them think that I am trying to upstage them or something?</p>

 

[nstewart]

<p>Amdvorak, I know how you feel about the "upstaging" thing.  I have friends with babies around the same age as my little guy and I've selectively started telling a few of them if it comes up in conversation.  I was surprised that one friend had thought about it, so I encouraged her to potty her little guy when he has to poop.  The funny thing is she thought it would be "inconvenient" if he didn't want to poop in a diaper!! I think it's the opposite.  Who wants to clean a poopy bum and wash dirty diapers when you can just flush the toilet?!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I was most nervous about spending a week at the inlaws and continuing to EC at their house as they can be very old-school (FIL seriously thinks it is some kind of crime that we are waiting to 6 mos to start solids and I had to keep a close eye to see that he didn't try to slip DS something) but they were great and my MIL was so surprised and impressed that we hadn't had a single poop miss the whole week and only used 5 diapers in the first 3 days.  She was saying how DS had to show his cousin (9 mos) how to use the potty.  Goes to show people can surprise you!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sometimes I tell and just prepare myself with the adittude of "go ahead, tell me I'm crazy, I dare you!!" lol.</p>

 

[nilatti]

<p>I tell my friends who have infants, OR no kids, OR older kids.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I DO NOT tell my friends who are struggling with pottytraining their 2-year-olds. And I especially don't tell them that my DH believes our son will be a grad by 18 mos.</p>

 

[b_light]

Thanks everyone for commiserating!<br><br>
My mom is still VERY unsupportive, which is annoying since she watches my daughter for a few hours once a week. She refuses to put her in anything but a diaper, even if she's visiting my house, she'll grab her and go put a diaper on her. Ugh. Maybe I could make a wool blanket available to her to hold her with, at least taking away the "she might pee on me" aspect?<br><br>
Anyhow, my mom becoming more aggressively against it, has made me stand on my own feet in protest a bit more, ha.<br><br>
On the other hand, I told my inlays and they have been really supportive. My mil will take her out of the house in panties and a potty seat (which I've started doing with great success), and comments that it's "fun". And says how could it be harmful, when she sits on the potty and smiles.<br><br>
So, I've got both extremes, but am no longer "in the closet" for family. But, I also don't talk about it at any time unless I need to.