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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am feeling almost zero pregnancy symptoms, and the ones I do get (swollen breasts, mild passing headaches, gas) all come and go and are so subtle that often I think it's all in my head.

I'm sure I'm pregnant per four positive preggo tests and no sign of AF. Somehow I'm not worried. I know there is a possibility of miscarriage and, well... honestly, I am ambiguous about it as I understand it is a great threat in the first three months and I wouldn't be surprised if I did miscarry from a blighted ovum at 11-12 weeks. My reasoning is that if it's not meant to be now, then it will be later, as I have no doubt now that I know I can get pregnant that one day I will carry at least one child to term. I guess I just strongly believe that anyone meant to walk this Earth will.

Am I the only one not obsessing? Has anyone else already come to terms about a possible miscarriage?
 

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I have your point of view too! Of course, I wouldn't WANT to lose my baby, and if I did I would be upset, but I'm not going to let those worries overcome all the wonderful feelings I'm experiencing right now. If this baby is not meant to stick, then it won't. And all the worries in the world won't prevent that. I had a little scare last week, but I'm not going to let it upset me. I trust in my body, so even if I do miscarry, I know that I am capable of becoming pregnant, and when it is meant to be it will happen.
 

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Great thread. I feel very similarly. Not to say that worry never creeps in from the edges sometimes... However, I have had a miscarriage before (granted, it was very early) and while I did feel a sense of disappointment, I was not crushed. I guess I have accepted that I don't know the plan, and have to go with the flow. I hope that if I am faced with another loss, which would now be further along than my first one, I could accept it easily and move on.
 

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i miscarried a blighted ovum (to the best of my knowledge) last winter just after 12 weeks (well, over several days - pretty much 12 to 13 "weeks"). i hadn't listened for a heartbeat and for some time afterward was very much at peace with the fact that it was a natural miscarriage at home (it was amazing to be reminded of the sensations of my incredible labor with dd), that my body was capable (that perfect little mini placenta!), and it was very healing for me to wait after the spotting started and have time to find acceptance. if i had known via early ultrasound or no heartbeat by doppler the waiting would have been nearly impossible. so i too understand what you are coming to peace with.
however, it took me almost a year to be ready to try again. even with an open heart and a text book miscarriage at home (just like my labor...) and awe in my body - seeing birth's shadow, and learning of all the depths of that shadow, while beautiful indeed, took much time, hard work and the support of the magnificent mamas in the loss forum to process. the sadness that followed was much greater than i ever expected and was seemingly unconnected to my attitude (i feel lucky and blessed in both my birth and my m/c). i thought i was ready for it. i checked the tp every wipe of my pregnancy with dd and the second one (this one too) and i do believe it still took me much longer than most. but.
i'm a better person for it, possibly a better mother even, and i wish i could say that i bounced right back. but i so didn't.

i admire your trust. and your strength.
mine (that beautiful trust not that everything is going to be ok, but that it will be.) is gaining, slowly, each day of this pregnancy.
 

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Beautiful post, Aileen. I am sorry for your loss.

I guess I should have clarified that I don't expect others to have the same thoughts or beliefs as do I, and I am not sure that mine would stand up to a really difficult test. I hope that I don't need to find that out. However, I'm not living in fear of loss, regardless how possible it may be. That said, I am looking forward to hearing the heartbeat, even though I know that it certainly doesn't guarantee me a good outcome--it is simply one more area that I can put a check in the box to make it all more real, and to decrease the probability of a loss.
 

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stacy - please don't worry, your post in no way made me feel i should feel the same way, i just always thought i would - i guess ultimately, in the end, i do (again). i really do admire the trust you mamas have, all three of you.
 

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I had a miscarriage in Sept. at 7 weeks. It was rough at first, but I came to terms with it. I just found out I'm pregnant again and I'm not dwelling on the thought of losing another one. It's like waiting to check the weather. Whatever happens happens. I also don't feel many symptoms yet. Not as much as my m/c pregnancy, but I'm not worried about it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks for all of your responses, ladies. I was a little worried about posting this, because I hear just how devastating a miscarriage is for a lot of women.

Aileen, I appreciate your words, they really hit a chord with me.
 
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