Mothering Forum banner

1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,475 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi mamas,<br><br>
I want to get us out of debt. I want to cut back, cut down, sell stuff, declutter, etc. and just eat away at the mountain of debt we have. DH is starting to finally make a decent salary and if we work at it we could do it.<br><br>
He just doesn't see the point. Thinks credit is meant to be lived on and eventually we'll pay it off. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
He has to go to Tampa on business in Dec. He wants us to go with him and make a minivacation (some would be paid by the business anyway - his flight, hotel, meals). I think it's ridiculous to spend money on plane tickets for me, the kids, etc. and then to do stuff down there when we have debt to pay. He's telling me he's taking time down there regardless and I can just stay home with the kids if I want.<br><br>
I love this man, but he drives me batty sometimes. He is normally reasonable and considerate. However, if he gets an idea into his head, and it's "my way or the highway." And then tells me I'm the spoilsport. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nut"><br><br>
Gaaahhhhh.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
134 Posts
That's so hard! It takes so much motivation/discipline to be on a tight budget, if dh isn't on board, it is sooooo much harder. I give you so much credit for acknowledging the situation and being the wiser person. Good luck <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,733 Posts
Okay give him Florida and without any nagging about money.<br>
Have fun enjoy yourselves, go out to eat etc. He wants to have fun too, so budget him a fun allowence and yourself the same no questions asked you can both spend 100 a month etc...<br><br>
But tell him come January 1. you are rolling in the purse strings and going to meet some 'goals' everyone has goals have him identify his, then set up your banking/shopping life to meet them quicker rope him in.<br><br>
my dp refused to see how much debt costs us.<br>
get a financial advisor lol nothing men hate more than looking dumb so they will agree with the 'expert' about paying off stuff quicker. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> and saving more.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,475 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
alison, these are excellent ideas. thank you!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,771 Posts
I think I'd write down the exact expenses this trip would be costing you, and tell him you'd be staying home to help you get out of debt!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
243 Posts
Doing the budget and showing my DH the actual numbers helped to curb some of his spending (not that he was spending a ton, just that he was more careless about it). Maybe he'd like something concrete vs. just the more formless "want to save money and cut down on debt" that works for you.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,747 Posts
Ummmm...give me back my dh! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br>
No, I say that to say our dh's sound alot alike. I'm always talking about budgeting and getting out of debt. My dh told me once, "I don't do budgeting" WTF!<br>
I thought we had the same money views. I mean we were together 2 years before we got married, talked about money, had precana (I'm catholic). I knew his credit score(which was excellent) and his savings ammount (lots of loot). But...you can still get surprised!<br>
Anyways...I'm slowly reprogramming him. I started doing our household bill about a year ago, I also give him an "allowance". He still occasionally buys stuff on credit...but it's gone way down now that he knows I'll drill him on it!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,475 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Okay, update.<br><br>
Went online today to price airline tix, minivan rental, etc. When dh saw the total price, he said, "hmm. maybe we should rethink this."<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief"><br><br>
I think he thought, well, tix are so cheap at $125 each (pretax) that we should go! Multiply times four plus taxes and all of a sudden you're over $700, plus $300 for a minivan rental (we have three kids), hotel (actually paid for through his work since he has to go anyway), food, etc.<br><br>
Amazing what happens when you give in to the inevitable and then he figures it out for himself...much better when he thinks it's his idea! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
Phew!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
75 Posts
Yes yes yes. DH (not dear, in this fashion) doesn't understand the concept of cutting back now...to have more later. We live paycheck to paycheck...and what's saved...gets spent on junk. Granted...it's important to dh, but if he'd just open his mind a bit, he'd see that he doesn't need that 30 dollar book, or that 50 dollar computer game. Ugh.<br><br>
PE
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top