[Beth-TX]

My dh and I have pretty much decided that this will be our last baby. We're expecting another girl, which we are quite happy with--no desire to "try for the boy." We're looking forward to getting on with our lives, not having to start from scratch again with another new baby (as much as we love them!). It just makes sense for us.

However, I'm not sure I want to use any drastic "permanent" birth control after this one (ie, a vasectomy for dh). I suspect that when this new baby is 2 or 3 I may get the itch again to get pregnant and we might change our minds.

Anyway, I guess my question is, what kind of birth control are you guys planning on using? I would really like to try FAM, but it might be hard as I did not get my first pp period with Ava until she was almost 2, and then got pregnant immediately after, so I didn't get a chance to "practice" at all. I'd like to be able to avoid any cute little surprises.

I'm not willing to do anything hormonal, either. My poor body has been under the control of weird hormones (bc pill, depo, pregnant, nursing) for almost 10 years straight now and I'd like to get to know the normal me again. I may be willing to try a cervical cap or diaphrahm--anyone have experience with these?

Hmmm, decisions decisions...

peace, Beth

edited for spelling...

 

[MaWhit]

This is our last, but we are planning to practice NFP/FAM until DH gets a vasectomy.

 

[christymama]

this is our last baby as well. We have two daughters ages 7 and 2 and then we lost a baby in April and now pregnant again I am 3 months now and when i reach 6 months dh is going to get a vasectomy. The reason we have no problem with this is because it is much easier for a man to get it done then a woman getting her tubes tied. If we decided later on that we want another child then he can get it reversed, His brother did it after having two sons then he split form his wife and gor remarried and then she wanted a baby so he got it reveresed after years of it being done. They got pregnant within months and now have a baby boy who will be one next month! So that is our plan . I hope you find out something that will work for you.

 

[Chelly2003]

We're going to use natural family planning and condoms.....

I don't do hormones very well, and I don't believe in cutting up either of us.
(Check out the effect of vasectomy before you send you DH off to have one)

 

[MamaOui]

This will be our last babe. I think we'll use condoms for a while and see how it goes.

 

[Penelope]

I'm considering an IUD. I suck at taking the pill. Dh hates condoms.

With my first pregnancy, my cycles didn't return until dd was 20 months, and I feel that by the time this baby (due 4/04) is two, I'll be ready for him to be snipped. So maybe it won't even be a long period of choosing b/c.

We've never wanted more than two. Girl, boy, whatever. I just really want the two of them!

 

[Elphaba]

just FYI, the diaphragm is not very effective in women who have had vaginal births. the unintended pregnancy rate in women who have had children and are using a diaphragm is somewhere around 30%. not very good odds.
there's condoms, male and female, spermicides, the sponge, the IUD (some have hormones some don't) and good old abstinence. or some combination of the above.

 

[Fleurette]

We're expecting twins and have a 16 month old dd so these will definitely be our last. I will probably go back on the pill as FAM just didn't cut it; dh wasn't as spontaneous and didn't seem "into" it as much as before.

Besides, this way I figure I can always try and talk him into one more! hehehe!

F.

 

[Marco Esquandolas]

Quote:

(Check out the effect of vasectomy before you send you DH off to have one)

Chelly! What do you mean?? Please say it isn't something horrible, as dh is scheduled for his big V on Nov 7th.

How would I go about researching this? TIA!

Soooo, to answer the OP, yep, this is it for us and dh is getting snipped to ensure that we have no more. He doesn't even want to wait to have the V until after this one is safely here...*sigh*

 

[USAmma]

This is our last too. We are also expecting our second girl and totally happy with what we have. No desire to try for a boy, we just think 2 kids is a good number for our family. I'm actually thrilled to give dd a sister. Hope they are good friends well into womanhood.

We are going back and forth about birth control but most likely I'll get the Mirena IUD for about 5 years (and probably use spermicide to make totally sure), and then when we are totally 100% sure dh will get snipped. I just don't want to risk another baby with anything less effective than the IUD. I'm very tired, have asthma/alleriges that make me have low energy some days, and financially it would just be hard to have more than 2 for us.

Darshani

 

[Chelly2003]

Quote:

Originally posted by phishmama Chelly! What do you mean?? Please say it isn't something horrible, as dh is scheduled for his big V on Nov 7th. How would I go about researching this? TIA!

I can't remember all the details, it was posted on a thread here a few months ago.
Perhaps start a new thread with that in the subject line and someone will post some links.
I just remember after reading about it, I told my DH he couldn't get cut.

 

[gurumama]

Here's a site with a very comprehensive explanation of the risks:

http://www.dontfixit.org/

scroll past the graphic to read the details. If you go into Google you can also type in "vasectomy risks" or "vasectomy complications" to learn more.

People blythely refer to "getting DH snipped"--but it's serious surgery. And with increased cancer and heart disease among vasectomy recipients, it's worth doing some serious research before having DH get it done.

I am now against having my DH get a vasectomy. We have no clue what we'll do for long-term birth control, but it won't be that.

Best of luck, and always, always do your research! We research breastfeeding, birth, circumcision, introducing solids, gentle discipline--and we should also research things about the adults too!

 

[its_our_family]

This is our last babe...yeah right!

:

Dh and I have been married almost 3 years and this is pg number 4...all unplanned!

We have no self control

We used NFP and condoms and got pg with ds because we both HATE condoms! (condom burn..not exactly fun!)

With pg2 we got pg through condoms and spermicide (I guess I have instant fertiltiy since af returned at 6 weeks pp even with bfing every 1.5 hours round the clock!) Lost at 6 weeks

With pg3 we got pg again through condoms..chem pg

With this pg I was charting...but I O'ed 6 days early! And we thought we could get in one more time before it was a

(we hadn't had condoms in the house for 3 months so we were asking for it

)

So, while we say this is it dh said he is trying to mentally prepare for number 3. Since we can't seem to prevent it!

I won't do anything hormonal and we've already proven that condoms don't work for us. We were planning a snip job when we first got married to prevent ANY children but all the docs said dh was too young (21). We asked around after ds was born and he was still too young (22). I have opinions about the IUD so I won't do that... So, I'm not sure what we'll do. I'm thinking that since dh will have 2 kids by the age of 23 that they will allow it...but we have to have the money first!

 

[GoodWillHunter]

This will definitely be our last kiddo. DH is going to have a vasectomy before the birth. I swear. Our last two are OOPS! babies and I think they're adorable and lovely and wonderful, but, well, I'm tired of diapers and mama ma ma ma ma mamamamamamama all the time. No mas para me.

 

[bebe luna]

This most likely will be our last. This babe was not planned and dh is still adjusting to the reality of having another child... I don't forsee him wanting any more, and I feel that if someday we decide we want more then we would both love to adopt (something we had considered before).
I have practiced NFP for years, yet both my pregnancies were unplanned while being a devoted NFP practicer...
I am very against hormones, IUD's, the sponge, etc... dh hates condoms, I am considering a diapghram... not so sure about a tubal, and dh is not too hip on the vasectomy idea. So, I think most likely we'll use NFP w/ a saliva tester, perhaps some ovulation test strips on hand, and maybe a diapghram for the riskiest times of the month.

 

[kerikadi]

I feel your 'pain'. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just turn off the fertility switch?

This is #4 for us and our NFP surprise.

I won't do anything hormonal either and the IUD is against some of my personal beliefs. I don't like the idea of sterilization at all but DH started talking vasectomy. I sent him off to do some research and now the idea terrifies him

This is serious surgery and can have lifelong affects

Also, the younger you have it done the more likely you are to suffer affects.
We are hoping my cycle will stay away longer this time and will probably use conservative NFP rules, though that worries both of us a bit as we are super fertile!

Keri

 

[Imonion2]

I may be willing to try a cervical cap or diaphrahm--anyone have experience with these?
>>

I used a diaphragm for about two years prior to this pregnancy. The biggest problem with a diaphragm is the same as a condom--you have to put it in--which sometimes is hard to do when you're really enjoying fooling around and don't want to. You have to have some self control! LOL It may be Ok if you're keeping an eye on your fertility signs as well.

My DH is opposed to the vasectomy, and I'm opposed to having my tubes tied. We both don't think extended usage of hormones is a good idea. I am personally having some doubts as to how safe it is to use spermicide gel with the diaphragm, since that sits right on my cervix. Who knows what we'll end up doing! We do both agree this is our last baby, but we thought our son was our last baby until DH one night told me he really wanted to knock me up. <g> So, I am undecided as well. I wonder about the IUD, would like to hear from someone who has used one before.

 

[USAmma]

Quote:

I have opinions about the IUD so I won't do that...

I am too, but hoping that the new one with the hormones will prevent ovulation in the first place. I don't believe in abortion personally, and I know that the IUD is an abortive if the egg does pop and get fertilized. It's just that we don't have many other long-term options. It's verrrry frustrating!

-- My cycles are irregular so NFP would not work for us. I don't want to take that risk of having an unexpected pg. I've known too many kids born that way.

-- I'm allergic to condoms so those are out, as well other physical barrier methods.

-- I've tried various forms of birth control pills and they all give me non-stop yeast infections, mood swings, and weight gain. Hoping that the hormones in the IUD will affect me less after I adjust to it since it's a lower dosage and closer to the ovaries.

-- Dh doesn't want to get snipped until he knows all the risks, although he's willing

-- I could get my tubes tied but that involves surgery. If the IUD doesn't work I may go that route.

Darshani

 

[guestmama9906]

Another vote for "we're on our last baby, DH is getting a vasectomy!" HOoray!

 

[Marco Esquandolas]

Thanks, gurumama for the link and the search ideas. I had actually heard of most of those risks so that at least isn't new news to us. Dh wants to have it done anyway, mainly b/c I'm allergic to many forms of bc and due to my personal and my family history of hypertension, heart attacks and the such, my docs won't even let me go on the pill. That doesn't leave us many options other than abstinence, yeah right!

: We're old enough to feel ok with going forward with this...I'm 31 and he's 29 and financially, heck, financially our second was a "financial burden" so I'm not even going there on what this baby or even gasp! a 4th would do to us. If I have any druthers, it's that I'd rather he wait to have it done after this baby is here, but he stands firm on the sooner the better. His first consult is in a week or two so we can work that out then, along with further discussing the risks they don't tell you about. The way I see it, we do have until next May to sort all of this out b/c so far as I know, you can't get pg while you're pg, :LOL