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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have a 12 year old girl who is gifted. I am also the proud Mom of a 13 year old girl - bright, in honors, but not gifted, 8 year old boy, bright, don't know yet...asks questions galore, and an 8 month old son who is just a shweetie pie! My GT daughter is well, hard to relate to for me. She is the brightest child I know, but has zero common sense where my others aren't "gifted" but can figure out simple things. Seems the easier they are dd doesn't get it. It *must* be complicated. She is obsessive about grades, must be above 97% on EVERYTHING. She is sweet, but demanding and can be lazy. Her teachers love her. She was identified in the third grade and honestly, I didn't know. I read all these posts her about knowing when they are babies and I just don't see how. DD didn't fit the mold. She was an easy baby, slightly demanding toddler, read at 4, but was VERY detailed oriented at an early age, this is the oly thing I can put my finger on. She consistantly scores in the 99 percentile on standardized testing in all areas. She was labeled Superior Cognitive, and really, I don't know what that means. I just love her and help her the best I can. Anyone else out there??
 

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I'm mother of 7 children, all of whom have been labeled as gifted. My eldest is 11y and she doesn't sound like your dd.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> She loves to learn and grades aren't a problem (she's unschooled). My dd is definitely a perfectionist and works hard to get everything right.<br>
Knowing that dc is gifted when they are a baby can be though. My youngest , newly 3y was identified when she was 1 1/2y. My 8y wasn't identified until he was 7y.<br>
I too want to help my kids but sometimes it's tough. As my kids grow up they want to be more independent and don't want me too help so I try to let them be.
 

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Your dd sounds a lot like me at that age. I taught myself to read at 3, was a very quiet and easy kid (youngest of 4), but I was in my own world and didn't "get" really basic simple things till much later. Couldn't tie my shoelaces until my late teens, I wrote L and R on my shoes till my twenties to keep them straight. My dad used to say to me "do I really have to <i>tell</i> you this?" and I'd be thinking "yes, you do have to tell me this, no, it wasn't as obvious to me as to everyone else on earth" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> Things like, the bathtub will overflow if you keep the water on to watch the whirlpool form near the overflow drain; hot pans will burn you, every time.<br><br>
I was never tested or labeled gifted. My parents did put me in a very academically advanced french language school, I was the only anglo kid to make the cut from my immersion program. Oh, I was in many special reading programs as a kid, I guess those were the gifted programs, but they didn't tell me, <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> .<br><br>
In some ways I was very dumb and very naive and had to learn things the hard way, the things that everyone else found easy, I found complicated and wierd (getting up in the morning, making simple choices), and the things I found incredibly easy (anything academic) set me apart from everyone else. It was an odd way to grow up, and I often felt very lonely (the other kids in my family are 5 and 7 years older than me, I used to do their homework for them when I was in elementary school, they let me do that, but not play with them, and they often went out of their way to point out when I'd done something stupid.)<br><br>
I'm not sure what you're asking for, other than to hear if there are other kids like this. It all kind of evened out in the end, I learned the "simple, common sense" stuff when the other kids were learning the advanced academic stuff, in my teens and twenties. My ds is 13, almost 14, in some ways very similar to me as a child. We homeschool, so I have sat down and formally taught him the common sense stuff, because I realized he wouldn't get it on his own. When I ask him to do things like household chores, I break everything down into numbered steps, and I explain to him why it has to be done that way (we're both incredibly oppositional that way, if there is another way to do something, we're *have* to find it.)<br><br>
I was seen by adults as often being lazy, but what was often happening was that, either they had not explained a really simple step that seemed totally obvious to them, and I didn't understand what they wanted, or, if I couldn't do something instantly and easily, I would give up quickly. Partly because I didn't know how to persevere and keep trying, I'd rarely had to do it, and partly out of fear that I would be ridiculed for being "stupid", something that happened quite often, from both other kids and adults (to be fair, spending a year with an 8 year old who picks apart your information and corrects you constantly can be pretty trying, and it must be hard to resist the urge to say "See, you don't know *everything*)<br><br>
So, I don't know if this is the kind of info you wanted, hope this helps, though.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>alima</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8181715"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Couldn't tie my shoelaces until my late teens.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/jaw2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="jaw2"><br><br>
My DD can't tie her shoes!!! She can, but not the normal way. I am stunned to read that.<br>
Thanks, I am glad she is not alone!<br>
I will tell her something, a task or something, and she just stares at me like she is figuring it out when it just couldn't be simpler in my mind. SHe puts things up in wierd places, I joke she can do her older sisters homework, knows more on global warming than 3/4's of the planet (her peeve) but she couldn't figure out how to turn on the dishwasher to save her life. I guess I DO see her as lazy and maybe I should readjust my thinking. Thanks so very much!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Mom_of_a_ton</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8160219"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">My eldest is 11y and she doesn't sound like your dd.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> She loves to learn and grades aren't a problem (she's unschooled).</div>
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Um, dd does love to learn and grades are a problem in the fact she has to have the best possible.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>wflcpw</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8119685"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">She is the brightest child I know, but has zero common sense where my others aren't "gifted" but can figure out simple things. Seems the easier they are dd doesn't get it. It *must* be complicated. She is obsessive about grades, must be above 97% on EVERYTHING. She is sweet, but demanding and can be lazy.</div>
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My DS is 15, but so much of what you wrote describes him to a tee!!<br><br>
I get so frustrated trying to explain simple tasks to him (like how to dust), but yet we can have long discussions about physics related stuff that I can barely follow. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br><br>
It seems like I have to provide step-by-step instructions for the most mundane household tasks or he doesn't understand.<br><br>
I know his very HIGH levels of perfectionism come in to play on some occasions and sometimes I wonder if he's just "playing dumb" to avoid helping out around the house. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
He has zero organizational skills and loves living in complete chaos. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>KariM</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8231590"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">My DS is 15, but so much of what you wrote describes him to a tee!!<br><br>
I get so frustrated trying to explain simple tasks to him (like how to dust), but yet we can have long discussions about physics related stuff that I can barely follow. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br><br>
It seems like I have to provide step-by-step instructions for the most mundane household tasks or he doesn't understand.<br><br>
I know his very HIGH levels of perfectionism come in to play on some occasions and sometimes I wonder if he's just "playing dumb" to avoid helping out around the house. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
He has zero organizational skills and loves living in complete chaos. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"></div>
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I am so glad I read this thread - I was about to ask about my gifted 11 year old, and whether being able to tell me the history of the Coca-Cola Company (since he "felt like" researching it) but not being able to figure out how to close the bread wrapper properly was strange. Apparently not! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 
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