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I know that practicing AP is right for us. When we were expecting DD, we didn't set expectations of what we would do, we just learned alot about different styles and then went with what worked for us. Not surprisingly, we co-sleep, breastfeed, make our own baby food, carry DD in a sling, etc. etc. etc... none of it is mainstream in our area.

While it feels right at 8 months old, sometimes I need reassurance that this style will make her a happy, secure, independent young woman someday.

Any success stories for me?
 

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The first couple I ever heard of who co-slept are have several kids that are all college age or older. As far as I can tell they were pretty AP. The mom is also a LLL leader. Their kids that I knew seemed to be well rounded, mature, and self-confident.
 

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And my DS is 10 now. He's extremely independent, intelligent (*brag brag*), and spirited. We also have a very close bond, despite the mouth that appeared when he turned 10 last February and keeps reappearing! I keep telling myself it's a phase...

I think AP was the key to the relationship we have now, esp. since I've been a WOHM since he was a teeny weeny boy.
The fact that we co-slept (every night until he was two, and then on and off until age four, when he left my bed on his own), and did everything together when I wasn't working helped him realize that Mama wasn't going to abandon him (IMO of course).

Just keep doing what you're doing!
 

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I took a lot of flack from people when my kids were smaller regarding the way dh and I were parenting them. We were told that we would really screw these two people up and make them socially inept, clingy individuals. I always rolled my eyes at those people.

My kids are 10 and 11 now and are the coolest kids. They are totally social (too many friends, if you ask me!), can go to events without dh or me and be able to function, and are turning into open-minded people who see everyone around them as an equal who should be treated with respect. They can tie their own shoes (I was told my son would never be able to tie his own shoes at age 5 because I kept helping him with them), and though they both slept with us for several years, they both sleep just fine in their own beds (but still come to see us if there is a giant thunderstorm at night).

Just this past weekend, I had a really wondrous moment thanks to my dd, age 10. She and I were out shopping at a new store where they have a "VIP" club for the girls who shop there (in other words, mailing list) ANYWAY, the computer was asking my dd questions like what is your favorite color, who is your favorite singer. When she got to who is your best friend she put "Susan".
That's me! She put me down. It was so cool.

Good luck with your AP lifestyle. It's such a good way to live
 

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My dd is almost 14 and we regularly get told what a wonderful child she is. She is thoughtful, responsable, considerate and gets along with people of all ages. I actually attribute much of it to homeschooling. Obviously cosleeping and cding and bfing are ap things that are great and we did those but I feel that they play a smaller roll in who she is now than gentle discepline, consideration of her needs and homeschooling have.
 

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My dd will be 3 in December and was AP'd from birth. Okay so that's not really an "older" child but she's beyond babyhood now and we are making way for the next one. I never was able to nurse but I bottlefed with love, holding the bottles every time and she didn't figure out they weren't part of my anatomy until almost 18 mos. old. lol! Co slept, sling, all that jazz.

Well she's now weaned from bottles, sleeping through the night in her own room, and potty trained. Looking forward to girlhood now and leaving babyhood behind. She's very, very spirited and intense, always has been. AP has helped so much with being able to understand her, get into her head, and work with her strong personality. We were able let her self-wean, and very gradually move her to her own bed from ours.

I think without AP I would have turned to spanking and CIO very easily with her personality. AP was a tool to help me bond with her enough to be an understanding parent. She's very sensitive and sweet. Yeah, she's every bit a toddler too, has tantrums and battles of will sometimes, but I just feel like we were able to work with her on her own level to make her the confident, happy, kind young lady she's turning out to be.

Darshani
 

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Hi there.
The two families that have influenced my parenting style the most both have practiced co-sleeping, breastfeeding and gentle discipline. One family has a 5,10, 16 and 18 year old. The other has three young children.

You can feel the love in their households in a way that isn't tangible, yet the spirit of respect for the children is evident. The kids from both families are so well-rounded, confident and have a real *sparkle* about them. They hug you genuinely, look you in the eye when you speak to them, really seem to enjoy life and are so joyful. They seem to expect the best because they've been given the best. I am convinced of AP.
 

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Quote:
I don't parent in the way I do in order to get a certain result. I do it because it is respectful of my children's human rights, and because I know in my heart that it is the right thing to do. If it has the effect of making a child happier and more independent as an adult, that's only a bonus.
I have to agree


My ds is only 3...Ill never know how different it may have been. I "suspect" he would be different in many ways had I not worn him or bf him as we still do.

All that aside, how I validate and help him and love him through things seems to be the thing that is shaping who he is the most.

I also suspect that homeschooling is going to make a difference too.
Ill be back in 10 years or so to confirm!
 
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