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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am not a very spritual person, to be honest. I do not believe in God, at least not a God that remotely resembles the Judeo-Christian/Islam God. I sort of believe in ghosts and some paranormal stuff maybe but don't really think much about it.<br><br>
I started having lucid dreams a couple years ago when I read a chapter in a book about it. That night I had my first lucid dream; however, I woke up within 3 seconds of being lucid. Since then, any time I had a lucid dream (about once every other month maybe), my brain would trick my conscious mind into turning off by dreaming that I woke up, within 1-3 seconds of lucidity.<br><br>
A few months ago, I became lucid and my brain did the usual tactic described above. I immediately dreamed that I woke up in bed, and told my husband I had a lucid dream. Then I went down stairs (it was not really my house, but a New York City apartment) and then went out onto the sidewalk. There were a lot of people bustling on the sidewalk. I turned left and began to walk. Very soon, out of the crowd and walking toward me, I saw my best friend from high school, who died at her own hand at age 22.<br><br>
Seeing my friend was stunning to me.<br><br>
Her life was very painful, due to the extreme hurt caused to her as a child that eventually led to her taking her own life. I had seen her smile and laugh many times, but never in my life had I ever sensed the smallest glimmer of contentment. She was too badly hurt for that.<br><br>
In my dream, however, she was positively radiating contentment.<br><br>
I thought to myself that this difference distorted the girl/woman I knew so much that I could barely recognize her. But it was her.<br><br>
I had stopped walking in shock, but she came toward me and put her hand on my shoulder. I honestly can't recall if she said anything, but if she didn't, she still communicated to me that everything was ok. Then the dream ended entirely, went black.<br><br>
It was profound to me, and I spent a few days thinking about it, but what happened last night really changed how I thought about this.<br><br>
Yesterday I read another chapter of the same lucid dream book. (I hadn't read any more since the first chapter I read a couple years ago). Then I had another lucid dream last night. This was a new level of lucidity to me, because when I became lucid, I managed to stay in the dream. I did not try to control it or do anything really funky to test my dream enviroment, but I was aware it was a dream, and I reminded myself of this fact every few minutes. I was also able to be aware of my sleeping body, and how its position was different from the position of my dream body.<br><br>
My dream at the time of lucidity was nonconsequential. I was in a large building and wandering around. After being amazed at my lucidity for a few minutes, I went into a door. It was the kitchen of some apartment, dark and dingy. I looked around for a bit when the other door opened, and in walked my grandmother.<br><br>
My grandmother was about 50 years old (she died at 84), younger than I ever knew her, but still not young. Again, I was stunned. She walked toward me and took me into a great big hug. While my grandmother was warm and loving, and we had hugged in greetings and farewells, she was not the kind of person to give great big hugs like that - in life, anyway. We hugged for a good minute. I saw that she was my grandmother, but then again she wasn't. She had changed. She radiated contentment, though this didn't radically change her the way it did for my friend (my grandmother was reasonably content in life). The bigger change for her was that she was more open, and more expressive. She did speak to me, and I haven't been able to recall her words, but I remember thinking that she didn't say anything really profound (like giving messages to anyone or giving clues about the afterlife or anything like that) - ultimately I think the gist of her words were "it's so wonderful to see you" (again, not something the woman I knew would precisely say or communicate). Then the dream ended and went black.<br><br>
So, do you think I was just dreaming? Or do you think I could actually have been in a state of awareness that spirits/dead people could communicate with me? Or something else? I'm fully aware none of you could possibly know, but I'm really wanting to hear any input. Especially if you've had any experiences like mine.<br><br>
I'm typically a fairly big skeptic but I can't shake this idea that somehow, the state of lucid dreaming (like, perhaps, a trance or "insanity" or being a young child, etc.) allows a communion that isn't normally possible. In my first dream, I was NOT lucid at the time that I saw my friend, but I still wonder if she somehow "saw" me when I was lucid, and then came to me even though it was sort of too late.<br><br>
The contentedness I've observed is intriguing and also very soothing to me. I have always leaned toward the opinion that when we die, we just die, or maybe only a few people manage to keep some spark of life and haunt us or something. This has obviously given me a lot to think about. Also the fact that the people had changed in some intrinsic way (for the most part, leaving behind the "baggage" they had in life) was also interesting.
 

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I often visit with spirits of people I've known when I am dreaming. There is a difference between having a dream with them in it and actually connecting with them. I cannot tell you how to distinguish, it's just something I know/feel.
 

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When I was little, I had a dream about my great grandma who passed away a few days before that. She didn't talk, she just looked at me, and I KNOW it was her. I can't explain why or how I know, I just do.<br><br>
I have never had that experience since. I have lost a number of friends and relatives, and I have had dreams about them. But that feeling - I'll never forget, it was never a question for me.
 

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What you have described has happened to me a few times. But just a handful of times in my lifetime, not in any great number.<br><br>
A few years back I had a dream about a childhood friend who had died at 23 by her own hand and it was awesome to see her again. We had such a great visit and it was awesome to reconnect...I really missed her and wanted so much to stay in the dream and feel like I used to feel when we pals as young girls.<br><br>
I've had the same hanging out sort of dream with my grandfather and I often talk to him as if he was near me...I always feel like I can talk to him.<br><br>
I look forward to these same kind of dreams with my grandmother who is very close to death right now. She's somewhat unable to communicate right now, but I hope we can have more meaningful communication/connection when she passes. Right now she's trapped in her physical body that should have expired years ago, but she's being kept alive artificially...but I digress.<br><br>
So, yeah, your dream sounds like you've been connecting with your friends and family. I've had similar lucid dreams but I don't think they were connecting dreams with the dead, but just lucid dreams where my minds was playing out my deepest fears (usually involving my children dying in some sort of preventable accident and I can't save them for some reason <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">). I always wake up so pissed off and freaking out...of course.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>2crazykids</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10268953"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I've had similar lucid dreams but I don't think they were connecting dreams with the dead, but just lucid dreams where my minds was playing out my deepest fears (usually involving my children dying in some sort of preventable accident and I can't save them for some reason <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">). I always wake up so pissed off and freaking out...of course.</div>
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I'm a bit confused... I thought that Lucid Dreams were dreams in which you realize that you are dreaming and can therefore control the dream. Is a Lucid Dream just the realization while dreaming that you are dreaming, even if you aren't able to control your dreams?<br><br>
I go through phases where I'll have lucid dreams fairly often, but then I don't for awhile. I've never communicated with dead people, though - I do the more typical things like flying, making out with hot guys, etc. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Queen of Cups</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10273853"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I'm a bit confused... I thought that Lucid Dreams were dreams in which you realize that you are dreaming and can therefore control the dream. Is a Lucid Dream just the realization while dreaming that you are dreaming, even if you aren't able to control your dreams?</div>
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I didn't know the answer for sure so I looked at Wikipedia.<br><br>
It says:<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">A lucid dream is a dream in which the person is aware that he or she is dreaming while the dream is in progress. During lucid dreams, it is possible to exert conscious control over the dream characters and environment, as well as to perform otherwise physically impossible feats.</td>
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So it seems that while control is possible, it is not required for the dream to meet the definition of lucid.<br><br>
In the two dreams I described above (I'm the OP), I did not exert any control while speaking to the dead people (I have at other times, however).
 

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Have never directly had this myself ... have dreamt about dead people but never in a way that I knew they were "contacting" me.<br><br>
But it happened to a close friend a long time ago and I witnessed it. Meaning she told me about it the next morning (we worked together) ... her recently-deceased mother came to her in a dream and insisted that this friend reconnect with her sister, that there was so little time, please, do it now, just desperately urgent ... (am also remembering the day the friend came in to work all upset about this dream and how worked up her mother had been in the dream) ... anyway, so the friend did just that, reconnected with her sister, calling her for the first time in ages, and then went to the West Coast to visit her a few weeks after that ... and a short time later the sister suddenly fell ill and was then diagnosed with a particularly fast-moving cancer and was then dead within a year.<br><br>
It was so clear to me (and her, of course) that that had truly been her mother sitting there with her in the dream, not just an image pr memory of her mother, you know?<br><br><br><br><br>
When I've dreamt about dead folks, nothing ever came of it, IYKWIM. Just silent or weird interactions.<br><br><br><br><br>
BTW I also understood lucid dreams to be dreams you are aware you're having when you're having them and that you can "control."
 

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A few weeks ago DH had a dream where my father's mother and sister came to him and had a message but he couldn't understand. I immediately felt that it was real when he told me, even though I seldom buy into that stuff. I still genuinely feel that they came to him; why not me? I don't know. I hope I can open my mind enough that they can reach me with the message, and truly I just want to see them again. It's been a long time.
 
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