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My daughter, Olivia, is 7.5 and she is gifted intellectually but she is also gifted in many other areas. Everything she does she excels in - ballet, gymnastics, singing, theatre, writing, etc. I am not trying to make this post a brag fest, I am just wondering if there is anyone else who's child is a mega overachiever. Sometimes I want to force her to just slow down but she loves everything she does. My other two kids are amazing and wonderful but they like to just kick-back and relax and do things at their own pace. Olivia just loves to always be on the go. Anyone else have a child like this?
 

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Yes, my six year old daughter is like this. She is interested in everything, and she excels in all that she does. My gifted son (9 years old) is not at all this way. His gifts are intellectual and artistic, but that's it.
 

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My *just* gifted child is -- wicked smart, talented, and atheltic. She is also beautiful, sweet, and makes friends easily. She is happiest when constantly on the go.<br><br>
My 2E child is very good at a few things, and has other things she just can't do.
 

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I have a theory about this. I have come to see this as more a result of having unusual focus, quick memory and self-control at an early age than true giftedness in everything. For my DD, it seemed everything she touched turned to gold. For example, when DD started playing the violin at 5, she was incredible and everyone commented on her musical giftedness. However, at 13, she's a talented/skilled player, not a "gifted" one. Once her peers developed comparable focus and strong fine motors, those with real passion began to surpass her. From 2 to 10, she was an incredible artist! However, what was truely amazing was her intellectual attention to detail and fine motor control. She can still draw but we've met some truely gifted artists her age and DD is not in the same league. Even in sports, her drive, fearlessness and gross motor control had her running circles around her peers. As a teenager, her body has shown limitations that no amount of hustle can overcome. I could sight other examples but they all follow a similar pattern.<br><br>
Don't get me wrong. DD continues to be a high-achiever in all that she does because she pushes herself to be so. There are certainly areas where she is clearly gifted and her peers aren't catching up even with equal physical strength and developmental maturity. She's just not the "best" at everything all the time as she once was.... especially in high-caliber environments that attract the most passionate and able kids.<br><br>
My DS is a totally different story. Even at 9, he still struggles with fine motors making him a poor artist and frustrated writer. He is mildly dyslexic which has made even learning karate routines challenging. People always get that he's smart but he doesn't have a shelf of first place trophies if you know what I mean.
 

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No, my kids are quite average in some areas. Intellectually they excel. Physically, ds has struggled (he's 2E in that he has some motor planning issues and was in OT for a while). He's doing baseball this year and has progressed a lot, but he'll never be the best on the team. Socially, ds is well liked, but definitely not advanced. I think as an adult, he'll do well socially as he's got a sly and quick sense of humor, but he's quiet enough that most kids don't wait for his jokes. Ds could be musical, but refuses to exercise that talent.<br><br>
Dd is intellectual and musical. She may also have some artistic talent. She likes sports, and is good at them but she's not super talented, I don't think. If she is going to excel at physical stuff, it's going to be through hard work. Socially? I dunno. She's very social, but she also has a definite idea of how the world should run (her way) and doesn't suffer fools gladly.<br><br>
So, I'd say your daughter is quite exceptional in many ways!
 

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whatsnextmom's theory is an interesting one to me. My 8yo has played baseball (as in, we've pitched to him and he's actually hit a moving ball) since he was 2. He started Little League at 5 and was one of the 2, maybe 3, best on the team. And right now, at 8, he barely hits the ball. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> It's very strange to see him have what looks like talent and then see it fizzle.<br><br>
So, I would say that, no, my kids aren't gifted in everything. They LIKE everything and want to try it all, but there are definitely areas where they're just pretty average - and those areas have changed over time.
 

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I'm not really sure? My DD has never done any organized sport or music stuff. She is gifted in all academic areas, with a special interest/obsession with History.<br><br>
Handwriting NOT gifted! lol
 

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In ALL areas? No. They have talents in a few other areas. They've chosen to develop some - ds has focused on his music and dd on drama - and leave others.<br><br>
They are well-rounded teens who enjoy academics, sports, and various artistic pursuits too. He's been into film-making lately and she continues her music lessons too. They've also both been working part-time.<br><br>
One issue that arises as they get older is that it is very difficult to pursue multiple interests at an elite level as the time commitments for those activities increase exponentially. I've found that happens at about age 8 to 10 - you may confront this problem soon. Be prepared to provide some guidance on making choices. It can be tough for an overachiever to realize that it's just not possible to participate at the highest level in everything. Especially as she watches former peers who have chosen to focus on a particular interest continue to develop and excel, thanks to more intense instruction and practice, while she stalls a little - or a lot.<br><br>
Your dd sounds very impressive. I'm sure your other 2 are amazing as well.
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">One issue that arises as they get older is that it is very difficult to pursue multiple interests at an elite level as the time commitments for those activities increase exponentially.</td>
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Absolutely! When DD turned 8, she zero'd in on theatre and that has dominated her life ever since. I'm still waiting for my youngest to find his passion though I think it'll take some time which I'm happy of. Once they start hyper-focusing like that, they usually move into environments with similarly passionate and able kids.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>whatsnextmom</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15373468"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Absolutely! When DD turned 8, she zero'd in on theatre and that has dominated her life ever since. I'm still waiting for my youngest to find his passion though I think it'll take some time which I'm happy of. Once they start hyper-focusing like that, they usually move into environments with similarly passionate and able kids.</div>
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Yes. The payoff for focusing on one or two activities is that they can actually become more creative and try more interesting things, instead of skimming the surface.<br><br>
Occasionally I'll ask if they miss an activity where they once devoted a lot of time and effort. DD once danced a lot - ballet, jazz, tap - and her studio really wanted her to dance competitively. The hours required are enormous though. She told me she doesn't miss it - even though she dances around the house all the time. Yesterday, she had me in stitches with her spontaneous creation of an interpretive dance for welcoming spring. Her portrayal of the wind and rain and growing flowers was lovely, but her imitation of squirrels had me laughing so hard my sides ached!!.<br><br>
Part of me wishes she still danced with a studio, but she's happy with her drama group. She's been pretty wise about where to put her energy and recognizing that she doesn't have unlimited resources.
 

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Agree with whatsnextmom. I have two kids in particular whose giftedness combined with temperament leads them to apply themselves with unusual focus and exceptional analytical and problem-solving skills to learning a variety of things.<br><br>
My 7yo, for example, has caused me to be pulled aside by dance teachers, soccer coaches, martial arts sensei, piano teachers, art teachers and violin teachers who quietly told me after just a class or two "Your daughter has exceptional talent in this area; please make it a priority for her." She doesn't attend school but her academic abilities are at least as impressive as these extra-curricular abilities.<br><br>
Like her 16yo sister before her, she will no doubt find a couple of areas of passion to focus on and pursue with passion and let the others drop as time becomes a constraint. I got a pleading e-mail from a university piano professor halfway across the country a few months ago begging me to reconsider letting my eldest drop piano; he had had his eye on her as a potential student and thought it was a tragedy that she not pursue piano as a career. But piano is not really her passion... and she has other things that are passions that she's just as talented at. She can't also be devoting 20 hours a week to piano.<br><br>
Miranda
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>ollyoxenfree</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15373380"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">In ALL areas? No. They have talents in a few other areas. They've chosen to develop some - ds has focused on his music and dd on drama - and leave others.<br><br>
They are well-rounded teens who enjoy academics, sports, and various artistic pursuits too. He's been into film-making lately and she continues her music lessons too. They've also both been working part-time.<br><br><b>One issue that arises as they get older is that it is very difficult to pursue multiple interests at an elite level as the time commitments for those activities increase exponentially. I've found that happens at about age 8 to 10 - you may confront this problem soon. Be prepared to provide some guidance on making choices. It can be tough for an overachiever to realize that it's just not possible to participate at the highest level in everything.</b> Especially as she watches former peers who have chosen to focus on a particular interest continue to develop and excel, thanks to more intense instruction and practice, while she stalls a little - or a lot.<br><br>
Your dd sounds very impressive. I'm sure your other 2 are amazing as well.</div>
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This is something we are starting to deal with now. She loves being involved in so many things but she is starting to realize she can't do everything. She just got recommend to move up to Senior Advanced in gymnastics, which is ages 9-11 and she is only 7, which is more training hours and they are thinking of moving her up to Senior Pre-Pro within the year so we've been having discussions of what it would mean to focus solely on gymnastics. I thought she wouldn't want to but she is set and determined to get to the competitive level. We do make sure to tell her that it has to be her choice and that she has to realize there are sacrifices.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>HeatherB</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15372911"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">whatsnextmom's theory is an interesting one to me. My 8yo has played baseball (as in, we've pitched to him and he's actually hit a moving ball) since he was 2. He started Little League at 5 and was one of the 2, maybe 3, best on the team. And right now, at 8, he barely hits the ball. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> It's very strange to see him have what looks like talent and then see it fizzle.</div>
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Huh, I wonder about that. DD has shown some talent in soccer (she'll dribble it around quite a bit and even attempted a step-over move yesterday <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">) but neither DH or I are particularly good at sports (I did play for many, many years but more because I was stubborn than due to any natural talent). I wonder if the same will happen to DD? She's also really good at dance moves etc.<br><br>
I'm pretty well-rounded and DH is very, very good at 2 different things but not so much everything else (although that is also because he's not really interested in anything and I'm interested in too many things!). So I'm curious how it will play out with DD as she gets older. My own parents were pretty similar (mom was good at 2 specific areas and dad was good at everything but not the best) so I wonder how much the environment and parental interests play a role?
 

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Gifted kids generally do tend to be gifted in many divergent areas. It really is exciting to see children who can excel at anything they put the slightest amount of effort into. I just have to remind my kids that some children are not gifted and this isn't something that should be held against them, it just is what it is. Like others have written here, there may come a time when they will have to prioritize a bit, but for now they are 'renaisssance' kids for lack of a better term. My dd made the most adorable clay mask for me the other day in art class and she said it was a cult mask for communicating with spirits. She says this is her religion now, lol.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Heavenly</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15373892"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">This is something we are starting to deal with now. She loves being involved in so many things but she is starting to realize she can't do everything. She just got recommend to move up to Senior Advanced in gymnastics, which is ages 9-11 and she is only 7, which is more training hours and they are thinking of moving her up to Senior Pre-Pro within the year so we've been having discussions of what it would mean to focus solely on gymnastics. I thought she wouldn't want to but she is set and determined to get to the competitive level. We do make sure to tell her that it has to be her choice and that she has to realize there are sacrifices.</div>
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Be sure to look around at other gyms and compare ... I don't understand the Canada system particularly but in the US there are tracks where the girls can train and compete in local competitions in a way that can be very gratifying for them but clearly aren't going anywhere serious and hopefully won't lead to a lifelong of back pain etc. My 6yo DD does 6-8 hours a week in the gym and I'm hoping to keep it that way.
 

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No, I don't think my gifted son is artistically gifted. Academically and physically, he is definitely way ahead, but his art seems pretty standard for a 4 yr. old.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>pigpokey</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15377380"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Be sure to look around at other gyms and compare ... I don't understand the Canada system particularly but in the US there are tracks where the girls can train and compete in local competitions in a way that can be very gratifying for them but clearly aren't going anywhere serious and hopefully won't lead to a lifelong of back pain etc. My 6yo DD does 6-8 hours a week in the gym and I'm hoping to keep it that way.</div>
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I think they do have a track like that, it's called the progressive level. I think that would probably be a better choice because then she could still do the other things that she loves. She just got her third call-back last night for the play Annie and she is so excited! I reminded her that if she were training many hours a week she wouldn't be able to do musical theatre. She is still so young she has years to decide about this.
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">She is still so young she has years to decide about this.</td>
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It's so unfortunate that in some areas, they don't get years to decide. Gymnastics isn't something they get to wait on considering they peek while still in their teens. Theatre is at least something that can wait as long as you are willing to give up those prime 8 to 12-year-old roles (and really, you wouldn't neccessarily use those on an adult resume any way.) We know countless performers that didn't come into their interest or talent until highschool or college. It's not impossible or improbable really. The female voice even doesn't reach full maturity until about 25.<br><br>
Kids with real passion will take a stand. Like I said, DD decided at 8 that theatre was top priority. She started with a very high-quality youth theatre but even that required 10 to 20 hours a week of rehearsal. When she moved into the professional realm, everything else ceased because what else can a kid who has 8 shows a week for months on end do? Now that she's 13 and 5'3", there aren't many professional roles for her but she still loves her youth theatre and chose a performing arts high school for next year. While I know it frustrated her, when push came to shove, she always chose theatre.<br><br>
While it seems now she is pulled in many directions, you will know when she's made her decision. It won't be a question or a dilema for her.
 
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