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Originally Posted by tabitha View Post
i have a really hard time with those quizzes, because nothing is so clear cut for me and i can never choose answers.
I feel like these quizzes CAN be useful, but as Tabitha says, it's asking for people with aspergers (or autism) to be able correctly interpret the situations listed as well as identify what their true reactions are. My son tried this quiz, but he honestly does not see how uncomfortable he makes other people in discussions, so his points for that were not taken. He doesn't LIKE to do things on his own, he LOVES to be around other people, so that was counted as NT, even though he almost NEVER thinks to call an acquaintance or hang out with peers his age (or if he does go out with them he completely ignores them while he goes on and on about his stuff and they ignore him to talk to other peers) He doesn't see his obsessions as much more than interests, and doesn't realize how much TIME he spends on them, so those were other questions that didn't get answered truthfully. He LOVES to make up stories, but he doesn't see that the stories he's creating are little more than cut-n-paste from other things he's read.

Do those all make sense? My dad is the same way, so far on the spectrum that the colors burn my eyes
...and he doesn't see it. Which is why when people tell me that they know they have aspergers because they took an online quiz...I smile and wave....smile and wave.
: because who really knows? Although I'm the first to sit in the McD's playland and say to myself...that kids has ISSUES!
 

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I've taken those quizzes just for curiosity's sake after I already had a formal dx. I was self-diagnosed at 16 using the DSM IV criteria and I got a formal diagnosis from an AS specialist shortly thereafter. I think there are some of those tests that are the real deal (or, at least, as close to the real deal as you can get with an internet test), but there are some of them that aren't.
 

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Discussion Starter · #23 ·
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Originally Posted by tabitha View Post

all my life i have felt personally to blame for all of my social shortcomings. it has always been that if i didn't fit in, it was because i was not trying hard enough.

i have developed a knack for pretense that frightens me, and i try to shy away from people to avoid using it. .

....this is true for me too. I thought that "pretending" was what everyone did in social settings? ... the difference for me, I guess, is that I *want* to be .....well, not introverted I guess....it's just hard.

I had a hard time for some of the questions too...some were obvious. Like, "do you often have the urge to jump over things?" Umm, no, can't say that I do. .... "Do you sometimes not know what to do with your arms?" ALWAYS. .....lots of them that were not so clear though; maybe some days yes, some days no.
 

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Discussion Starter · #24 ·
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Do those all make sense? My dad is the same way, so far on the spectrum that the colors burn my eyes ...and he doesn't see it. Which is why when people tell me that they know they have aspergers because they took an online quiz...I smile and wave....smile and wave. because who really knows? Although I'm the first to sit in the McD's playland and say to myself...that kids has ISSUES!
The whole post definitely makes sense....which I guess was kinda my original question in posting this..... so maybe if you know you're socially awkward, you're just, well, socially awkward. Or shy, introverted, whatever. If you're autistic you likely wouldn't realize that?
I definitely would not be diagnosed myself based on the DSM IV stuff...that's much clearer than the quiz.
 

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Discussion Starter · #25 ·
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Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy View Post
Sign language was useful, .
See, now THAT confuses me; as I understood it, Aspergers (SP?) comes with a large vocabulary? .... I've mostly ignored or skipped over aspie stuff for that reason in my reading, since DS has a delay in speech, quite the opposite. Sign language HAS been a huge help here, esp in the last couple weeks, he's learning signs now as fast as we can learn them. Being able to communicate definitely helps cut down on frustration, on both sides. We've had a few people telling us to quit signing and he'd start talking 'cause he'd have to; I've wondered whether we were doing the "right thing" or not w/ it; but now that he's learning so many of them I'm very glad we are.
Do autistic kids "turn into" aspie adults as they grow up, learn to talk, & learn some social rules?? (Does that ? even make sense?)

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It took me a VERY long time, a lot of heart ache, and a lot of help from some really good personal relationships to get to where I am today, maybe if I had figured out early on a way to chew-stim in a socially acceptable way, or maybe if I had learned to self medicate myself with caffeine earlier, or maybe if I had learned that I need to drown out distractions, and think of many things at once before the clarity singular concentration can happen, it would have been easier,
can you elaborate a little? Specifically, ANYthing that you think I may be able to use with / teach to my son that might save him any little bit of heartache or pain.... I know I can't "save him from the world" but ..... I certainly don't want him to have a more difficult time than average at the very least.
....How does the caffeine help? My mom gave my brother coffee instead of ritalin when the school wanted him labeled ADHD.....but we all feel like he really isn't ADD/ADHD at all, he's just very smart, and learned stuff quickly so he was able to do his schoolwork more quickly than most kids. And when he was done, like any boy, he didn't want to sit in his seat anymore. Just easier for teachers, if he's on a drug to make him act like a zombie, than to find something else for him to do. (and no, I'm NOT saying that's always the case, I think there are kids and adults who do need help....just that it's often overused)....
OTOH; I "need" coffee in the morning to ....the running joke in the family (me and my aunt both) are not "human" til after the first cup of coffee. Tried to "break the habit" lots of times but I'm always more social w/ it, so risk the health stuff associated in order to get along w/ everyone better. Especially work days.
What about the chewing thing? Do you mean ...you wish you'd learned to chew gum or something instead of hand flapping or similiar? Is that even possible?? Can you teach a child that without making them feel bad? (seems to be the debate for / against ABA, right?) We've been pretty successful w/ the vibrating teether or ice, to keep DS from biting his cheeks - that's a new habit though anyway, so ...? Haven't been doing that so much with the intention of teaching him something though, as to keep him from, well, biting his cheeks (he bit enough to bleed the other day; and I don't want that to continue or become a real habit)

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I can provide my parents with working rules to help them interact with my kids in a way they never could with me.
Care to share?

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That is what it means to be human though, humanity stands out in its ability to learn things collectively that cannot be learned in a single life time.
pure brilliance right there.

and feel free to write a book ....or whatever. ANYONE here. Looking for as much info as I can get my hands on....

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I don't think it's unusual to go your whole life and not realize until a child is diagnosed. I think that's somewhat common actually.
Really?? ... that seems, well, somewhat crazy to me. Maybe not so much in a case like above, where the parents know and hide it from the child, tell he grows up and figures it out himself. But to not have a clue at all??? Is that really commonplace?
 

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Quote:
Your Aspie score: 120 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits
I don't think I am Aspie, I have a lot of other diagnoses (OCD, ADD, social anxiety) that could also explain my non-NT behaviors.
 

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My parents didn't seem to notice. They knew I was unusual. But I was a fantastic reader and identified as gifted in the early years( then had the gifted diagnosis taken away when I was in grade 5 or six) really clutzy but good at swimming. They thought I had some OCD type of behaviors and I hoarded food at one point. I had really bad anxiety that was misdiagnosed as asthma attacks (rolling eyes!) They were messed up themselves though and alcoholics so they didn't pay much attention. My step brother was diagnosed just a couple of years ago in his 30s with tourrettes. That went unnoticed as well.
Kids that were Aspie back in the 70's or 80s wouldn't have had any " box" that they fit into... we clearly didn't fit the stereotype of classic autism. we were just Seemingly intellegent kiddos with lots and lots of quirks. I just always got blamed for not trying hard enough... always treated like I was wasting potential. I was just considered quirky. It would be interesting to see what teachers really thought about me back then.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
Care to share?
after many unsuccessful attemots at interacting with our kids peters parent finally asked us what could they be doing differently. it was tough cause i always kinda wanted them to work out their relationship on their own and didn't want to be a helicopter parent and tell them how to interact with their grandkids, but man, they needed help. last year before we visited in december we came up with a few things and man did it work. they were here a couple weeks ago and they are definately 2 of our kids fav people now.
: before the "rules" every visit with them had ended in a meltdown from jet (since he was like 4 months old even). and marvel had never had anything to do with any of them - just clung to us the whole time refusing to make eye contact.


here's what we wrote -

Quote:
Also thanks for the interest in how to better interact with Jet and Marvel.

I will do Jet first cause he is the hardest.

Jet often mistakes enthusiasm for aggression. This means that if someone is excited to see him, he may think they are mad at him, which is very stressful for him. Jet responds very positivly to the strategy of letting him come to you. This doesn't mean that you must ignore him, just that you can't make a big deal about him or he can get really uncomfortable.

Item/gift recieving is uncomfortable for Jet. He does not accept things out of people's hands most of the time (like if I give him a hot dog, I am more successful if I just set it on the table and walk away, casually mentioning to him "There is a hotdog on the table for you" he will not respond, but later he will go and get the hotdog.) Of course, if he asks for something rather than you offering, it is ok to directly give it to him, but if he does not accept it, then it is best to set it down and let him know where it is.

iIlicited responses make Jet very uncomfortable. He is often unsure what the correct response is in a social situation, so he gets very nervous when someone makes it clear that he is supposed to respond. "Hi Jet" is fine, but "Hello Jet, hello? hello? hi? hey I am talking to you..." will send him running for the hills. Sometimes his responses to questions and greetings will come HOURS later, sometimes minutes later, sometimes never. It is ok to ask questions and to be friendly with greetings and such, but it is not ok to press for responses.

Blurted instructions to jet will not go over well. Even if positive. "Jet! go get your candy!" will get just as horrified a response as "Jet get off the kitchen table!". He will accept most instruction more readily if you explain the reasoning behind it. It is better if nobody besides andrea or I gives him direct "orders" even if they are positive ones.

Marvel

Marvel is extremely bothered by loud noises, off-key singing (like me and andrea's singing, she begs us to stop), bright lights are painful/frightening to her. Also loud/confusing conversations (like where many people are talking at once) can sometimes cause her to retreat.

Both kids actually love attention and affection, but it just takes them a loooong time to warm up. It is best to just let them be and hope they come to you.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy View Post
That is what it means to be human though, humanity stands out in its ability to learn things collectively that cannot be learned in a single life time.
What you said is part of the gift aspies/people on the spectrum have. I don't think it's the high IQ (which so often goes with it), but a different way of seeing the world that would be lost if there were no aspies.

With all the heartbreak of trying to fit in, be "normal" and live in a NT world, it's so important to honor the strengths and gifts that come with it. Aspies are beautiful people with a depth that is sometimes astounding.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
Do autistic kids "turn into" aspie adults as they grow up, learn to talk, & learn some social rules?? (Does that ? even make sense?)
Many people are confused about speech delay and Asperger's because of some overly publicized generalizations... the DSM-IV states:

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DSM-IV:
There is no clinically significant general delay in language (e.g., single words used by age 2 years, communicative phrases used by age 3 years).
in other words, many kids that are considered to have profound speech delay, actually have "no clinically significant" delay.
This is why the youngest you can possibly get an Asperger's dx is age 3, this is one of the reasons PDD-WTF is so common, because if you do not meed criteria for Classic Autism, but you are not old enough to be dx Asperger, you will default to the "I dunno" diagnosis.

Also, with regard to Autistics "turning in to Aspies" when they grow up... Autism is still largely considered a childhood developmental disorder, Asperger's has a bit better PR, so it is the natural course of events. Since there is a spectrum, and the spectrum is measured largely by skill level, it only makes sense that one would be able progress, the traits that do not have to do with skill level, should not be considered "lower" or "higher", but the fact remains that many people think of/define aspergers as a "higher functioning" autism, and I would expect most people are "higher functioning" as they mature.

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Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
....How does the caffeine help?
Caffeine works for me like a mild ADD medication, with better-known side-effects. It speeds up my heart rate, and helps me focus.
Before I discovered caffeine, I discovered that I could do my math homework significantly faster if I had to pee, so I would chug water and intentionally hold it in so that I could blast through my math work. I know now the science behind what I was doing. Men particularly, have higher blood pressure and pulse when their bladder is full. Effectively speeding your whole body up.

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Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
What about the chewing thing? Do you mean ...you wish you'd learned to chew gum or something instead of hand flapping or similiar? Is that even possible?? Can you teach a child that without making them feel bad? (seems to be the debate for / against ABA, right?) We've been pretty successful w/ the vibrating teether or ice, to keep DS from biting his cheeks - that's a new habit though anyway, so ...? Haven't been doing that so much with the intention of teaching him something though, as to keep him from, well, biting his cheeks (he bit enough to bleed the other day; and I don't want that to continue or become a real habit)
The chewing and sign language thing are inter-related I have motor problems with my mouth if I do not properly stimulate and exercise it, if I do not, I tend to slur, studder, stammor, and trip over words. When I was little, I was punnished and shamed for chewing on my shirts, it worked to break me of the habit, but it greatly stifled my physical ability to speak, even though I had plenty of mental capacity for it. I was self conscious about it, so I stopped talking unless absolutly necessary, 3rd grade sign language afforded me a more comfortable means to make my needs known.

Later in life, I unconsciously discovered that if I constantly ate chewey candy, I could flirt and talk and articulate... I got a job at a candy store, and constantly carried gummi candy with me all throughout high school. I switched to Mentos in college, still I am famous for having insane amounts of candy all the time... nowadays I chew "Trident White" before every business meeting, the candy has done havoc on my teeth, but I would not be where I am today without it.

I would not try to stop a stim or substitute one, I would try of offer a more effective means of accomplishing the stim. "If you like chewing shirts, wait till you discover the accompanying shock of a pepermint blast from chewing gum." Rather than "Here lets hide your shame, no shirt chewing allowed, only gum." It is a difference in attitude, focusing on helping the person deal with themselves, rather than focusing on dealing with how other people see them. Many "make em look normal" therapies fail miserably because of the simple fact that many Autistic people REALLY DON'T CARE how other people see them.

Quote:

Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
and feel free to write a book ....or whatever. ANYONE here. Looking for as much info as I can get my hands on....
I am working on it, but it is currently back burner to my NanoWriMo novel.
 

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Your Aspie score: 129 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 57 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie

(I got a 38 on the other test where over 34 is an extreme score.)

...if that's true, it would certainly explain a lot!


I really didn't need a test to tell me this. My whole life has been one experience after another pointing to the fact that I'm coming from a very different place than most of the people I interact with. Must be the two heads I have grown (or at least from other people's reactions to me I must have two heads as far as I can tell).

Actually, I think the quiz only scratches the surface. Plus, there was some ambiguity in the questions, leading to uncertainly in my answers. In addition, it's difficult for me to say whether some of my answers would actually agree with the way others would answer for me.
 

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DH and I periodically have the "introvert" debate. I think there is absolutely nothing in the world wrong with being an introvert. It takes all kinds to make up a world. DH sees introversion as a mild defect - something to tease me about. (The real joke is that *I'm* excited about visiting family for the holidays, while he'd rather stay home and piddle-fart around the yard.)

Growing up my mom always felt I had "too much self esteem". I'm not joking - she has said those exact words to my face. What she's really picking up on is that I'm pretty self aware - not that I think so highly of myself. I recognize my abilities, dis-abilities and oddities, and I accept myself for who I am.

I'm very self aware - so I notice the things about me that are not "typical", but I can't take all the credit - I've had alot of things pointed out to me. My family is very blunt, and I have been told when I am weird - so maybe I have been trained to be more self aware than normal. (Maybe the self esteem is that I'm fine being who I am.) Anyway, the point of all this was that I can see how someone less self aware might not find a test like this useful.

I makes good sense to me that there are all kinds of ways of being. I think what autism illuminates is how unfair it is to assert that only one way of thinking and being is socially acceptable.

I wrote alot and don't feel like I've really nailed what my thought was - I guess it is just that alot of people seem to feel unhappy and uncomfortable in their skins, and I just wish this world was more accepting of all the human variations.
 

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Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
Really?? ... that seems, well, somewhat crazy to me. Maybe not so much in a case like above, where the parents know and hide it from the child, tell he grows up and figures it out himself. But to not have a clue at all??? Is that really commonplace?
That's my story. I didn't realize there was anything wrong with me until a few months ago.
 

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ShaggyDaddy, today I was thinking....at least your parents tried to help you. No one ever noticed that I had trouble speaking, or if they did, they just figured I would grow out of it or something.

Once when I was about ten, my mom screamed at me, "YOU HAVEN'T SAID TWO WORDS TO ME IN WEEKS!!! GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!"

Me:
: stomped upstairs to my room...

Also every teacher always wrote on my report cards that I need to participate more in class. Like I was just choosing not to participate. Or something about not applying myself, the hidden message of wasting potential.

I never had so much as a referral for speech therapy.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy View Post
youngest you can possibly get an Asperger's dx is age 3, this is one of the reasons PDD-WTF is so common,


Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy
The chewing and sign language thing are inter-related I have motor problems with my mouth if I do not properly stimulate and exercise it, if I do not, I tend to slur, studder, stammor, and trip over words. When I was little, I was punnished and shamed for chewing on my shirts, it worked to break me of the habit, but it greatly stifled my physical ability to speak, even though I had plenty of mental capacity for it. I was self conscious about it, so I stopped talking unless absolutly necessary, 3rd grade sign language afforded me a more comfortable means to make my needs known.
I can't remember if I had any chewing stims. I really liked candy necklaces
. It is hard for me to speak, even when I have things in my head I want to say. I don't really know why it's so difficult, I don't studder. But if I'm not slow and careful, I will mix up word order, or even the order of syllables in a word. If I am emotional, my throat and mouth just get tight and closed up and I can't speak. An alternative method of communication would have been helpful.
 

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Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post
....this is true for me too. I thought that "pretending" was what everyone did in social settings? ... the difference for me, I guess, is that I *want* to be .....well, not introverted I guess....it's just hard.

I had a hard time for some of the questions too...some were obvious. Like, "do you often have the urge to jump over things?" Umm, no, can't say that I do. .... "Do you sometimes not know what to do with your arms?" ALWAYS. .....lots of them that were not so clear though; maybe some days yes, some days no.
You're supposed to answer the questions as you were as a child. I loved running and jumping up until adulthood. If I ever got unsupervised access to the school gym, I liked to run and jump onto the play stage.
And I liked climbing onto the roof of the shed, and climbing trees. And jumping hurdles in gym.

ETA: I'd probably still like running and jumping, except now my boobs are too floppy.
 

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That was fun.

Your Aspie score: 62 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 139 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical
(to the extent that introverted geeks are typical, ha)

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Originally Posted by azmomtoone View Post

Score
32 - 50 Scores over 32 are generally taken to indicate Asperger's Syndrome or high-functioning autism, with more than 34 an "extreme" score.
31
30
29
28
27
26
25
24 Average math contest winner
23
22
21 Average male or female computer scientist )
I scored a 22, making me think "wow! their scale descriptions are spot-on."
 

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Interesting--I am definitely, definitely SPD and scored high on the Aspie scale in one section, but I'm very much socially typical. I got:

Your Aspie score: 31 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 174 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical
 
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