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505 Posts
I'm going to lose it. Seriously.
I feel like I'm on here every day either posting a problem or a worry. This is only confirming for me that I'm doing such a lousy job. None of my IRL friends seem to have complained so much.
DS won't sleep unless I'm holding him. If I put him down, he wakes up within 15 minutes. And the only place I can put him down is in his car seat. He won't sleep lying flat. I put him on his tummy the other day and it lasted a little while, but I'm not "supposed" to do that. He barely sleeps at night.
He sleeps when he's nursing though, that's not a problem! Then it seems like he doesn't eat enough, so he's up again in a few minutes.
I guess I could spend the entire day and night (for what seems like the rest of my life) in my bed, topless, with him attached to me.
I put him in his carrier, and sometimes he likes it, but mostly I have to be walking around. Otherwise he's kicking me and slamming his head into my chest.
I have been having tons of breastfeeding trouble - you can read all about it in that forum. It's non-stop, painful bf-ing.
I try to entertain him, but he doesn't seem to enjoy it. I know he's young, but I don't know what to do with him. Then I find myself online or watching TV. Is that good parenting? It seems like no.
I can't eat, I can't sleep. All I do is argue with DH. He says I seem depressed (ya think?). Then he tells me that he thought I knew this would be hard. I didn't know it was going to be this hard, all day, every day for weeks on end. I thought I would enjoy this. I thought there would be fun times. And maybe we've had fun times, but I'm so tired and unhappy that I feel like I enjoy nothing anymore.
I just want to get out of here and sleep for about a week or two.
I can't go outside, it's way too cold now. I go back to work in 5 weeks. How in the world am I supposed to hold down a job when I'm up all night? DH works a ton and is NO HELP when he gets home. In fact he often complains about how dirty our house is and how tired he is and blah blah blah...
I feel like such a bad mother. I can't keep up and I'm losing my mind. I'm embarrassed at how bad I'm doing with all of this. I wanted this baby so badly. It was all I could think about for years. And now I keep wondering why I wanted this - I'm so unhappy. And how can I be this unhappy with this beautiful baby whose only crime is wanting his mama 24/7.
DHs suggestion is to have his mother come and stay with me to help me. I don't want her here, watching me fall apart. I don't want someone else to take DS like he's a problem I need help dealing with.
I'm nursing him again, he's falling asleep, which means he won't eat enough, he won't stay asleep and I'll be doing this again in less than an hour.
Is it this bad for everyone and I'm just stupid for thinking it would be different? Why can everyone else do it and not me. What's wrong with me...
I feel like I'm on here every day either posting a problem or a worry. This is only confirming for me that I'm doing such a lousy job. None of my IRL friends seem to have complained so much.
DS won't sleep unless I'm holding him. If I put him down, he wakes up within 15 minutes. And the only place I can put him down is in his car seat. He won't sleep lying flat. I put him on his tummy the other day and it lasted a little while, but I'm not "supposed" to do that. He barely sleeps at night.
He sleeps when he's nursing though, that's not a problem! Then it seems like he doesn't eat enough, so he's up again in a few minutes.
I guess I could spend the entire day and night (for what seems like the rest of my life) in my bed, topless, with him attached to me.
I put him in his carrier, and sometimes he likes it, but mostly I have to be walking around. Otherwise he's kicking me and slamming his head into my chest.
I have been having tons of breastfeeding trouble - you can read all about it in that forum. It's non-stop, painful bf-ing.
I try to entertain him, but he doesn't seem to enjoy it. I know he's young, but I don't know what to do with him. Then I find myself online or watching TV. Is that good parenting? It seems like no.
I can't eat, I can't sleep. All I do is argue with DH. He says I seem depressed (ya think?). Then he tells me that he thought I knew this would be hard. I didn't know it was going to be this hard, all day, every day for weeks on end. I thought I would enjoy this. I thought there would be fun times. And maybe we've had fun times, but I'm so tired and unhappy that I feel like I enjoy nothing anymore.
I just want to get out of here and sleep for about a week or two.
I can't go outside, it's way too cold now. I go back to work in 5 weeks. How in the world am I supposed to hold down a job when I'm up all night? DH works a ton and is NO HELP when he gets home. In fact he often complains about how dirty our house is and how tired he is and blah blah blah...
I feel like such a bad mother. I can't keep up and I'm losing my mind. I'm embarrassed at how bad I'm doing with all of this. I wanted this baby so badly. It was all I could think about for years. And now I keep wondering why I wanted this - I'm so unhappy. And how can I be this unhappy with this beautiful baby whose only crime is wanting his mama 24/7.
DHs suggestion is to have his mother come and stay with me to help me. I don't want her here, watching me fall apart. I don't want someone else to take DS like he's a problem I need help dealing with.
I'm nursing him again, he's falling asleep, which means he won't eat enough, he won't stay asleep and I'll be doing this again in less than an hour.
Is it this bad for everyone and I'm just stupid for thinking it would be different? Why can everyone else do it and not me. What's wrong with me...