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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DH and I are discussing a new latex bed from Savvy Rest. DH wakes up sore every morning, and our old coil bed is just no good.

However. I'm expecting baby #3 in a month. Will the bed be too soft for SIDS risks? All the SIDS literature says make sure that the bed is very firm. I tend to co-sleep for four months only, and I expect the bed to last much longer than that. We're planning on the top layer being soft talalay. Would that be a problem for co-sleeping?

Also. We're thinking of getting a king, maybe even a CA king. DH is 6 ft tall, and is excited about the prospect of getting a taller bed. Again, we won't need all that width once I'm no longer pregnant (I'm using a lot of pillows right now and I take up a lot of space!) and once we're no longer co-sleeping. I've heard some people say that having a king was bad for their marriage in that it was too easy to stay angry and just sleep at opposite ends of the bed, whereas with a smaller bed you really have to make up before falling asleep. DH and I don't really fight, but we do fall into spells where we sort of lose touch with each other. Does anyone have any experience with that, either way?

This baby (#3) is supposedly our last.

Aven
 

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I don't know anything about the type of bed you are looking in to but I wouldn't get a huge bed like that. DH and I have a queen now and discussed whether or not to get a king size bed when we get a new bed but decided against it for the same reason you listed. We don't argue but when we do get aggravated with each other we always get over it by bedtime.
 

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There's no guarantee that your separate-sleeping kids will actually STAY in their separate beds, or that this new baby will happily transition to a crib after 4m the way your others did. You just may find that you'll have extra people in your bed, whether that's currently your plan or not.

As for the "separate sides of the bed" issue- I for one can't imagine a marriage where sharing the bed was so important. There's always the option of sleeping on the couch or climbing in with one of the kids, or going to bed after you've fallen asleep. Couples can avoid interacting with each other no matter how small their bed is, and couples can maintain open communication and loving attitudes towards one another even if they sleep in separate beds every night. IMO, a big bed gives you the option of snuggling together if you want to (ie, you're in the same bed) but also the option of having your own space if you need it. Forced closeness and the resultant resentful feelings can cause problems as well.

The thing is, your DH needs the extra length in the bed, right? I've only seen XL beds available in twin or king- it's not like you even have the option of getting an XL queen or full bed.

As for the softness of the bed, I thought that latex was a fairly firm material? I guess there's latex of various firmness available? One good option would be to have a removable "pillow top" over a very firm bed. You remove the "pillow top" when you have a baby in bed with you, and put it back on when the child sleeps in his or her own bed every night.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ruthla View Post
I for one can't imagine a marriage where sharing the bed was so important.
I don't think that a king vs. queen is going to make or break my marriage, not by a long shot... but I think that sharing a bed is one (small) aspect of a happy marriage. I'd like my bed-sharing to contribute to my marriage, and not detract from it.

Aven
 

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Not sure about the firmness of the latex, but I sure wish we'd gotten a king when we got our new mattress before DD was born (we have a queen). We're still cosleeping at 2ys and we could sure use the extra space. I don't think a larger bed would 'prevent' cuddling BTW, I think that is all up to you


Even before DD when DH and I would go on vacation, we LOVED the spaciousness of the kings! We didn't get it because we thought it would take up too much of our bedroom - but I still wish we had!
 

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I recently bought a latex bed, and I can attest to the fact that is is VERY firm. It is also super comfortable, as it has a wool topper. I feel totally safe having my nearly 6 month old in bed with me, and would have definitely felt ok with having him in this bed when he was a newborn.

My boxspring on the other hand... (see thread below)
 

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I've got to weigh in on having a king.

We used to have a double. We thought that was fine, and we were a little smug about how close we were because we slept so close together. Then by chance someone gave us a king. Now that we've had the king, we'll never go back even to a queen. We love having a king. We seriously sleep so much better than on the old double. I think that we were sleeping more restlessly before because the movements of each other kept disturbing us, but neither of us realized it until we had the bigger bed! Plus, it's nice for all cuddling in as a family on lazy mornings!
 
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