[TeaBag]

Well, in the last week, I've dealt with my husband coming back after 13 months, telling me there's no chance for us to work on our marriage because not only is he having an affair, they are getting married in the spring. I have dealt with the hurt and anger in some healthy, some not-so-healthy ways. I have asked 5000X "why?" I will never have a true answer to that question.

We have discussed finances, we have discussed custody, we have discussed tons of stuff. He is being generous financially, taking on all the debt as well as paying a more than fair amount in c/s and s/s. I removed my wedding ring the other day and replaced it with a beautiful amethyst and diamond ring that I chose myself. We went out drinking last night and had a good time

: We have agreed to remain friends, I even see us being good friends in the future, once I have worked through all the hurt. I am beginning to stop looking at what *we* had, and looking at what I *can* have. I'm moving to a place that I love and I have good support. I am even considering purchasing a house instead of renting--oh the joy of him taking all the debt! :nana: I am going to get us there, get us settled; find a job. I plan to start college in the spring, online probably at first as I won't want to leave the kids any more than necessary, but as they get older and start school, I will be able to take more classes, etc. I obviously have my moments of sheer terror; my moments of just wanting to sob my eyes out, my fits of temper--the other night, I lost my temper and flung anything within my arms' reach at his head.

Unfortunately, I'd had a few beers and my aim was off.

I'm going to heal. I'm going to be stronger. I'm going to be healthier.

I Can Do This.

 

[mandib50]

i feel proud of you

you're gonna shine

 

[MamaDaednu]

You rock, mama.

And what an inspiring post.

 

[Jilian]

I'm glad you are doing better. Just a word of advice: Have him put all his generosity in writing while things are friendly between the two of you. You should both sign it in front of a notary and have it notorized. Sometimes things can get ugly quickly and ex's can change thier minds. CYA mama!

 

[JustVanessa]

You are doing awesome!!!!!

to you Teabag. Maybe it will rub off a little?

 

[Red]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilian I'm glad you are doing better. Just a word of advice: Have him put all his generosity in writing while things are friendly between the two of you. You should both sign it in front of a notary and have it notorized. Sometimes things can get ugly quickly and ex's can change thier minds. CYA mama!

Oh, yeah! Things can change very quickly and that's excellent advice.

I'm so glad things are working out for you! Yeah! Dump that debt and run. Apply for any help you can get. Don't do anything, like try to hurry the divorce for him, until after you have his agreement in writing.

If you and your dh can actually be friends, how marvelous THAT would be for your kids! What a gift to give them.

I've been thinking of you every day.

: Thanks for keeping us informed.

 

[CrazyRED]

WOO HOO

Does it make you stronger to write it out.

You CAN do it, you will do it. And you will be a better person for it.

 

[MissAbbyRosesMamma]

YES YOU CAN!!!

 

[bobica]

You freaking rock mama!!! You can do this!!!

You are one amazing mama and will be so much more so on the other side of this mess!

 

[Kaitnbugsmom]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilian I'm glad you are doing better. Just a word of advice: Have him put all his generosity in writing while things are friendly between the two of you. You should both sign it in front of a notary and have it notorized. Sometimes things can get ugly quickly and ex's can change thier minds.

totally agreed..