[Destinye]

DD is quite bright and highly imaginative and talks quite clearly around us though she talks to herself, her toys and her imaginary friend a lot in jargon as well as normal speech. She talks in long sentences (5 to 10 words) and interacts and plays a lot with us and by herself. In a group or playing with other kids now she does not say anything or babbles, talks very unclearly and does not answer much even stuff she has known for a long time. It does not bother me what people think but wonder if it is a form of shyness or nervousness. We moved and were out of playgroups and things for a while, and maybe thats something to do with it too. I notice too she will not talk as much with us for a while then will come out with a whole new level of speech (new prepositions and adjectives for example) and think maybe she is observing and learning when she does this and when she interacts with new groups of people, as she does start to talk more after a while, but its taken 8 weeks of the library lapsit before she will say anything. Generally she is very confident, affectionate and spirited and the talking and unclear speech around people is relatively new though she has never said much around a lot of people and strangers. I am taking her to more things now and not making a big deal about it but I wonder if it is some form of shyness and if other people have experienced this. She is 2.5 now.

 

[FreeRangeMama]

I would guess it is just normal learning to talk behaviour. My ds2 is almost 3 and he talks very well at home, but in situations with other people he stutters and is very difficult to understand. My 5 yo ds was talking in full sentences for a long time before he would speak to "strangers" and he also stuttered until recently. Maybe your dd feels confident with her speaking skills around people she knows, but not as much outside her comfort zone (yet). Maybe she is over-excited, distracted, etc. in those situations and speaking clearly isn't as easy when she has other things to concentrate on

She will probably grow out of it before you know it.

 

[faithnj]

My DD is not as old as yours-- but she definitely does the same thing. Talks up a storm at home. Won't say the basics, or will babble in public. I really do think it's stranger anxiety. She also took a long time to get used to library play groups, and would stand off at the side. But once she got into it, she loved it. And she would lap sit just like all the older kids, when it was story time. Don't worry. I think this really has to be a phase.

Faith

 

[Destinye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by FreeRangeMama I would guess it is just normal learning to talk behaviour. My ds2 is almost 3 and he talks very well at home, but in situations with other people he stutters and is very difficult to understand. My 5 yo ds was talking in full sentences for a long time before he would speak to "strangers" and he also stuttered until recently. Maybe your dd feels confident with her speaking skills around people she knows, but not as much outside her comfort zone (yet). Maybe she is over-excited, distracted, etc. in those situations and speaking clearly isn't as easy when she has other things to concentrate on She will probably grow out of it before you know it.

Thanks and I am sure you are right. She definitely gets very over-excited and distracted thats for sure, but in a very focussed way. I was concerned as we had a play-date with a litrle girl almost the same age as DD 3 days younger who also spoke very well but seemed much more mature than DD, and I am sure its just a personality thing, DD is extremely focussed and spent the entire playdate playing with the girl's toys and discovering how they worked, and ignoring everyone even food. Anyhow we started a small play-group like I used to go to and hopefully another one or two children will come along and will see how DD does.

 

[Destinye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by faithnj My DD is not as old as yours-- but she definitely does the same thing. Talks up a storm at home. Won't say the basics, or will babble in public. I really do think it's stranger anxiety. She also took a long time to get used to library play groups, and would stand off at the side. But once she got into it, she loved it. And she would lap sit just like all the older kids, when it was story time. Don't worry. I think this really has to be a phase. Faith

Thanks and she also had a lot of separation anxiety, which she is only just overcoming (she has been very high needs all along and would probably be a basketcase by now without AP! - seriously) usually at the library she was trying to do things like open the cupboards where the toys are, go to the back and examine the flag she was obssessed with, run out of the door to examine the water-fountain, but now she will sit and listen and yesterday did actually yell out the words cat and dog, so maybe she is getting more comfortable and less distracted. Part of the distraction is she is very observant and yesterday kept saying there is a moon in the tree, and I said oh! so she said it again, so finally she ran over and showed me and in the wooden reading tree was a carved crescent shape. Anyhow she is who she is and I hope she settles down and becomes less nervous speaking around people.

 

[LynnS6]

You might also like to read "The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child" -- it's got decent 'explanations' for this kind of behavior. Introverts tend to be more stressed by social situations.

Our son is like this. When he started daycare he would not talk to the teachers. He would only whisper. As he gets older, he's doing much better. But new people still take him a long time to warm up to.

 

[Destinye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LynnS6 You might also like to read "The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child" -- it's got decent 'explanations' for this kind of behavior. Introverts tend to be more stressed by social situations. Our son is like this. When he started daycare he would not talk to the teachers. He would only whisper. As he gets older, he's doing much better. But new people still take him a long time to warm up to.

Thanks. The funny thing is I really thought she was more extroverted (which she may still be) but was seeing her in situations she knew and felt comfortable in. I think I will just give her some time and see how she does. She definitely may be more introverted and shy than I thought thats for sure.

I talked to my mother and she said I used to do the same thing (and I am definitely more introverted) even though I could speak perfectly fine.

 

[VBMama]

My ds is the same age as your dd, speaks very well and in complex sentences with us at home, but he rarely talks out in public. It makes me laugh when he actually says something at playgroup, and my friends there (we've been going for over a year) are astounded at how well he talks! I never thought to be concerned about it because *I* know his speech capabilities, I figure he's just busy taking everything in when we're out & about.

 

[rubelin]

Introverted/extroverted describe how you recharge. Introverts, even though they may be very social and enjoy being with others, need to be alone ot recharge, they get drained (and then overwhelmed) by being with others, no matter how fun it is. Extroverts get drained being alone (though they may enjoy being alone occasionally) and recharge by being with others.

 

[Destinye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubelin Introverted/extroverted describe how you recharge. Introverts, even though they may be very social and enjoy being with others, need to be alone ot recharge, they get drained (and then overwhelmed) by being with others, no matter how fun it is. Extroverts get drained being alone (though they may enjoy being alone occasionally) and recharge by being with others.

Thanks and that does make sense - thats definitely me! Maybe she is the same way too she does play and 'read' a lot by herself too, quite happily and by her own choice.

I cannot imagine getting re-charged by being with others its so draining lol! I am an INFJ in Myers-Briggs personality tests.