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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Charlie needs to start napping in his crib. He is almost too big for his swing and we cannot leave him on the bed unattended. Plus Jean takes him to work with her and she needs to be able to lay him down and have him just go to sleep during the day. She cannot keep laying with him for his entire nap.<br>
I tried yesterday and after lots of screaming and crying (I was there, he wasn't alone) and me rubbing his face and shushing him, he slept for about 15 minutes, and was up and crabby the rest of the day.<br>
I don't want to leave him to cry, but he has GOT to start sleeping in his crib during the day. Sleeping with a parent isn't optional, and neither is being nursed to sleep and nursed back to sleep every 10-15 minutes.<br>
Help!
 

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Estelle, first of all, I looked at Charlie's picture and he is beautiful <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
You know, sleeping is really different for each child and their needs change as they grow. I am thinking Charlie senses the urgency when it is nap time and it makes him anxious. My dd didn't sleep on her own at nap time, really ever. I'm sure that's not what you want to hear. My son, OTOH, slept for a nap on the bed, after being nursed. Both of my kids nursed to sleep and when waking.<br><br>
Is there any way you and Jean can make a different schedule with Charlie for now, like longer lunches at work to try nursing charlie all the way down and then trying to lie him down? He may sleep much better after nursing contentedly. He is letting you know what he needs right now and he is still so little. This time really is short, even tho it doesn't feel that way now...<br><br>
Can he sleep in a sling while Jean is working?
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
He won't sleep in a sling. He's too big to 'lay down' in one, and she couldn't carry him for the whole time.<br>
Right now to get him to sleep she puts his swing outside. He won't sleep in it inside.<br>
She can't lay down with him or take breaks. She doesn't get breaks!<br>
Right now I stay home with him 2 days a week and she takes him with 3 days a week. If she can't figure out a way to get him to sleep alone those three days, he's going to end up in daycare, which means me working the other two days to pay for daycare, so basically him being there five days a week. Obviously we don't want that to happen!<br>
She is also having problems with nursing him to sleep and wants to stop that, but that's a whole other post! She wants to wean him entirely, but won't as long as she can make the sleep thing work.<br>
We gave in way too much in the beginning. Well, not give in really. But he was so sick and was so itchy and in so much pain all the time, so we were willing to do anything to get him to sleep. Now that his health is a bit better and he is more comfortable during the day and night, we would like to get him to sleep better, versus being up 6 times a night and sleeping in ten minute stretches during the day. If he doesn't sleep better, Jean is going to demand he be out of our bed period, and she'll likely stop nursing him. She's tired of not sleeping. But this post is about the more pressing issue of the naps. Unless someone has some magic formula for him to night wean peacefully (or cut down to 1-2 times a night, instead of every 45 minutes)
 

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It can be done, but not very quickly, I don't think. Swaddling works for some kids, even bigger babies like yours. The No-Cry Sleep Solution has good ideas. My ds falls asleep in his car seat, his sling (while sitting up on my hip), or while nursing most easily and can often (though not always) be transferred to his crib.<br>
It sounds like you have pressing issues, but it's not a problem that can be solved in a matter of days <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Good luck!
 

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What a beautiful little boy you have!! My DD is 5 mos and until recently I held her for almost all of her naps. Whenever I tried to lay her down she would wake up within a few minutes until I "discovered" the swaddle cure. (She's a big girl, at 4 mos she was 17 libs and 26 in. So I had to cut a sheet up to make a swaddle wrap for her.) I took one of our old sheets and cut out a 52 inch square.<br><br>
I swaddle her up (nice and tight) and then nurse her to sleep and then lay her down. She'll now sleep 40 mins at a time. (She naps about 4 times a day. I put her down every 2 hours for a nap.) The whole process takes about 15 min. The most important thing is getting the swaddle wrap on snug so he'll feel wrapped in a little cocoon. (I used instuctions from the Happiest Baby on the Block book.) The one thing I don't do is pull her legs up. I leave them long so she can't kick out of the wrap. I laugh when i think about swaddling her because she's not a newborn and seems so big, but it has been the only way for her to nap outside of my arms.<br><br>
Noise also disturbs my DD. If your DP's work is noisy at all you might want to consider a fan or white noise machine. I hope this helps!! Good luck! (I also swaddle her at night and it has helped her not nurse as frequently.)
 

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Hey Estelle...<br><br>
Dominic slept ON one of us well past 6mo. He wouldn't sleep anywhere else AND he would wake up upon transfer. Then it got to the point that I could transfer him... first it worked about 30% of the time and eventually we got to about 95% if the time. It was another few months before my SAH DH could transfer him (after a bottle of EBM). These days (and he's 13mo), he's transferred for all his naps, but still nurses / sucks a bottle (he won't take a paci) to fall asleep.<br><br>
NCSS is brilliant. We haven't made it work yet.<br><br>
Has the every 45min nightwaking been constant since birth, or is this a newer addition - cuz it comes w/growth spurts and teething. We introduced solids becaiuse i needed more sleep. Not sure if ya'll are holding off due to Charlies' allergies..<br><br>
hope this helps...<br><br>
Joy
 

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Hi Estelle,<br><br>
I just wanted to share what we do with our 5 mo. old DS. He is a big baby, was 19 lbs. 6 oz. 3 weeks ago, not sure how much he weighs now, but probably over 20 lbs. Anyways, he fits laying down in my sling and falls right to sleep (we have the new native baby carrier) then I can easily transfer him to his crib while asleep. Have you tried essential oils? For my DD's I put a drop of lavender oil on the backs of their pillows, also my ODD likes to listen to music to fall asleep. GL! I'm sure it is frustrating.
 

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When our DS was younger we used the "stinky t-shirt trick" with great success.<br><br>
He went through a stage when he would wake up every 15 minutes if I was not in the family bed with him.<br>
So after nursing him down initialy -- we would leave a t-shirt that I had been wearing and nursing in for a day or so with him. Somehow the mama-milk smell and softness there helped him stay asleep longer and if he stirred he would grab and smell the shirt and re-settle. I'll bet it could work in a crib or wherever he goes to sleep.<br>
It made life easier for me because I work nights at home after he sleeps and now he sleeps from the time he goes down until I come into bed around 1am. And naps are better too. Eventually, he didn't need the t-shirt anymore, but he does have a blankie and it serves the same purpose.<br><br>
Hope this helps!<br>
Best to you!
 
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