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I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing...<br><br>
When my 2 3/4 year old gets frustrated or angry he wants to hurt things, so he'll tell me that he wants to hurt me, or hurt the baby, or hurt one of his little stuffed animals and he'll try to do it. EAch time I talk to him about what he is feeling - is he mad, sad.... "you really want that xzy don't you?" and I explain that he can exclaim "I am so mad!" and do <insert activity here like stomping or hitting a pillow> instead of hurting the baby, for example. Is that ok? IS there a better way?
 

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I do that but I also find it very helpful to act it out <b>with</b> him. We're generally very happy people overall so acting it out together usually dissolves us into giggles. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/joy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="joy">:<br><br>
It also helps him to understand the suggestion. I find that often my DS needs to see what I am saying in order to thoroughly understand it, which isn't surprising. After all, if you were set down in a foreign country, charades would be more useful than someone chattering at you all day long. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/blahblah.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="blah blah">
 

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One way I learned while doing my student teaching was to have an area where you keep a red cloth (red for anger) and encourage them to go to that spot when they are mad/angry and rub off all the anger with the cloth, scrub real hard, maybe even throw it on the ground and stomp on it. It gives them a physical way to express it, and becomes a bit of a distraction too so that when they are done they are calmer and have either forgotton why they are mad or are in a better state of mind to discuss their feelings
 

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I love the idea of the angry cloth. Any idea what age it might start being useful?
 

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my friend gives her son paper to shred (used paper bags work, too), a pillow to wack around, and crayons to draw his feelings if he desires. works well.
 

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Forgot to mention earlier:<br><br>
Something else we do together is bang on drums. If he's angry about something, a drum can be much more satisfying than a pillow because it is generally harder and will make a loud noise. I bought a child-size bongo drum set for about $20 and it works very well for us. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/drum.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="drum">:<br><br>
I also think it's helpful for me to be very matter-of-fact about it. I stay calm and let him know that it's okay to be angry; "here are some ways to be angry." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/fencing.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="fencing">:
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>hergrace</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11625095"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I love the idea of the angry cloth. Any idea what age it might start being useful?</div>
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well, I saw it used in a preschool classroom (3 and 4 year olds) but it would probably work as soon as they are old enough to understand the concept and follow directions (or mimic you doing it) That would vary from child to child.
 
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