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With DD #1, I went to Bradley classes, read tons of birthing books, and even kept a journal to work out my thoughts/fears/emotions about the upcoming birth. I read positive birth stories online, made/revised/pondered/revised/reworked and reworded my birth plan over and over, and otherwise basically did a ton of prep work for my birth. We had a very successful, rather painful (at least for part) HB with DD #1, and overall I was very pleased, content, and proud of my labor and birth experience.<br><br>
With this pregnancy, I'm not sure I could care less about prepping for the birth. I checked when the Bradley classes are, but have made no effort to arrange child care for DD so that DH and I could attend. I loaned my birthing books to a friend, and have made a half-hearted effort (at best) to get them returned. I'm not sure I really care to read them again. I do have a homebirth midwife, but I haven't really given much thought to a birth plan.<br><br>
I keep thinking that as my pregnancy progresses, my interest will also increase, but I'm beginning to wonder. I can't figure out if I just don't want to deal, don't really care, or have some sort of trust that all will go well. Right now I'm thinking that my last birth experience humbled me, and now I think that nothing I do will really change it -- birth will happen no matter if I'm prepared or not. So why waste time preparing for the inevitable? This is so different from my last time, and not like me at all. I'm usually an over-prepared person, not a "whatever will be will be" type of person.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/headscratch.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="headscratch"><br><br>
Anybody else having trouble gearing up for labor and delivery? Any thoughts about gearing up for birth #2? (or #3, #4...) Is it normal for "veteran" moms to not be as enthusiastic about birth prep? Thanks for your thoughts.
 

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Ha! DDCC from June. I am 36weeks today, and if the birthing "interest" is going to kick in...well, it hasn't yet!<br><br>
I am very similar to you. With DD i read all the "good" books, (ina may, kitzinger etc.), planned my labour to the nth degree, read and researched everything i could, rehearsed breathing, you name it. I never did bradley, mainly because here in the UK it's not all that common or anything, but i did read up on a lot of techniques, buy essential oils, and have a whole bunch of stuff planned out.<br><br>
This time i had already lent all my books out to other (first time) pregnant friends, haven't even bothered trying to get them back, have no birth plan, discussed details very vaguely with my mw today (ie am happy to have no VE's unless requested/necessary, happy to have doppler monitoring every 20-30mins, want a physiological 3rd stage as default, don't mind augmenting it if medically necessary) and though we hired an independent midwife, that seems to have translated into me not really worrying/thinking about it much. I keep thinking of the things which actually helped/worked out with DD's labour (which was very non-textbook and frankly crazy at times, long prelabour, then 86mins 1st stage, 5mins 2nd stage, 14mins 3rd stage, was holding the baby wondering if it was time to push yet) and thinking i'll deal with it all when my contractions start.<br><br>
I don't think it's that i don't care as such, more that i kind of realise that whatever i plan i will get what i get, and i know the bits which helped (deep slow breathing, warm bath, hands and knees to help rotation from OP) and the bits which didn't (practically everything else i rehearsed/planned/tried) so i guess this is me now. I do think it's normal to some degree for 2nd-time arounders who were pretty happy with their first birth to not think too much about it next time.
 

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This is my third. I took Bradley classes with the first, I read a lot with the second (my first UC). I'm doing nothing this time-- I'm ready when she is. I've hardly thought about the birth at all. I'll order my birth supplies next month and maybe think a little more about it then.
 

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I totally relate. Last time I made so many lists, did so much research, and read hundreds (if not thousands) of birth stories trying to prepare myself. I packed so many things to go to the hospital (birth ball, snacks, tennis balls for back massage, my breastfeeding book, sudoku puzzle book, candies, gum, multiple baby outfits, you name it!). My birth plan was one very full page packed with 10 point type.<br><br>
Then I had a very fast birth (so I didn't need many of the items I brought to get through labor). I don't think I would have used them either way. Also, the hospital completely ignored some of my birth plan (such as physiological third stage). My birth was very different than I imagined.<br><br>
This time I have a minimal birth plan that really highlights the things that matter most to me (focusing on the things that went wrong last time). I am doing much less to prepare and just expect to go woth the flow a lot more. I think I learned last time that as much as I wanted to control the birth of my baby, I will mostly just be along for the ride! At least that's how it feels.
 

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I'm usually overprepared too! With my first I did tons of reading and did childbirth prep classes, full on birth plan, etc. The only thing I did for #2 was take DS1 to a sibling prep class-nothing for me though. It just didn't feel like enough time had passed that I needed a refresher. I also didn't do a birth plan for #2. My hb midwives don't use them and I figured I could print out my old one if I did indeed need a transfer. And for this babe, I've done nothing. Well, I've got all the hypnobabies tracks but I haven't listened to them at all <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br><br>
I think the only thing I'm really obsessing about this time is feeding the freezer sufficiently and surviving the first month!
 

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Same here, and I was kind of worried about it around 20 weeks, so I posted on the "I'm Pregnant" forum and got a lot of "me too" responses, and a lot of people said the second time they were able to go on instinct or experience, and it was okay.<br><br>
Actually, I'm a little relieved that I'm not so focused during this pregnancy. Everything with my first was so intense and important and so very precious that it was almost overwhelming, emotionally. I'm glad just to be sailing along with this one. A few moments ago I caught a whiff of my drawer containing my dark chocolate and dried raspberry leaf, and the smell took me back to the days of my pregnancy with DD. I'm afraid I won't have those kinds of special memories ir associations with this one, but that's kind of ok.
 

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I think the only thing I'm really obsessing about this time is feeding the freezer sufficiently and surviving the first month!</div>
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Me, too! I'm much more focused on the pp period this time.
 

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I am, but for different reasons. With my last baby, I went nutso preparing for birth and it was a really bad experience. One of my most overwhelming feelings was "How could this have failed when I prepared SO much!??!?!?!?!" I promised myself at the start of this pregnancy that I would focus on the BABY and not the birth. I have made the most minor of necessary plans for the birth like hiring a doula, but after that I actively work to totally forget about it.<br><br>
I figure that I know as much as I can and rereading and obsessing isnt going to do anything anymore. It doesn't guarantee a happy positive birth, and the opposite DOESNT mean that you are doing anything wrong or that you are weird. I think its pretty cool this time around to go with the flow and just chill out.
 

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This is my second and at 26.5 weeks I have hardly read anything at all. Last time I was constantly reading "what to expect when you're expecting" and other resources. Last time it was all so unknown! This time I feel confident and relaxed - and I love my midwife, so I trust her a lot. I'm not making a birth plan, just telling my midwife what I don't want at the time. After last time, I really trust my body - I'm actually looking forward to giving birth, but not spending too much time obsessing about it. All I know is that I want to relax even more this time (and I was pretty relaxed last time!), oh and also I don't want them to clamp and cut the cord before it stops pulsing.
 

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I'm definitely much less obsessed about the day to days of pregnancy. I read the weekly update, with most interest in "how big is the baby now" parts. Otherwise, I feel really calm and like "oh, yeah, I've done this before" about pregnancy.<br><br>
As far as BIRTH prep, I did Birthing From Within as our prep class, and I don't know that I got all that much out of it. I had a pretty good birth last time, with the exception of getting a bit panicky about the actual delivery part. I was petrified of tearing, so I was very conflicted about pushing or not pushing and ultimately DID have a 3rd degree tear. This time, I'm taking a Hypnobirthing course, and trying to be prepared to be much more accepting and calm of the delivery. I know I can handle an unmedicated birth just fine, I just want to be a little happier about it, and less in "survival mode."<br><br>
We're also having a homebirth this time, vs an almost homebirth (a freestanding midwifery birthing center), so we have to gather supplies and prepare space. I'm starting to think about that part, and I think that process, combined with my hypnobirthing practice will be what I do.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
I had a dream last night where I went into labor, and my MW showed up and said "where should we set up the pool?" and there was nowhere in the house that it fit...so I must need to do a little prep (at least I should figure out the footprint of the pool!) <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
Thanks for the feedback ladies. It's good to know that I'm not the only one just going along for the ride during this pregnancy.
 
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