[emmasmominar]

I don't know if this has been talked about before but....

Are you scared your DC won't want to know about you or who you are?? That really bothers me. He will be 4 in Nov. and I talk to his mom on the phone regularly and his sometimes but I am scared he is never going to want to know who his birth mom is. Now I am Jessica.

Every night when they say their prayers they say "and thank God for my birth mom Jessica" and they are open to him about being adopted (well as much as you can with a 4 year old)

I wrote him a letter telling him why I did what I did and everything but, I am just scared it will be like the movies and he will hate me because he will think I didn't love him, when its the exact opposite, I did it because I loved him more than anything.

 

[Illyana]

My children have been adopted for 8 years now. It used to bother me to think that they would hate me or wouldn't want to know me but now that my daughter is having so many emotional problems where I'm concerned I really wish she didn't remember me so her life would be easier. I'm not allowed to contact her so I just have to suffer through the updates I get on her that are getting worse and worse. I just want what is best for my children regardless of how it affects me. As long as they're healthy and happy it doesn't matter if I never get to see them or talk to them. If me seeing them or talking to them would hurt them then I'd rather not no matter how much I miss them and love them. I started a journal a long time ago for my children to read someday so they know I was always thinking of them and I've always loved them.

 

[gypsypoet]

I'm scared that his relationshipos with women will be messed up because the first woman in his life "abandoned"
him.. We have an open adoption but it still worries me that he will be affected by my decision and feel angry

 

[emcare]

I go back and forth on this one.

Sometimes I am scared that she will never want to know me, and other times I think that if she is happy and secure and kind and loving--that's all I've ever wanted. What she wants to do about me doesn't really matter, you know.

I mean, that's why I placed her in the first place--'cause it was the best for her, not me.

Now, in my heart of hearts, do I want to know her? Do I want her to love me? Of course. Is it esential? No

I hope that our adoption being somewhat open will help in that area, but I guess you never know.