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My 10 yo DS has a big problem being bossy. It happens mostly with his peers. He has always been an alpha male type. I encourage his assertiveness but I'm afraid his bossiness is going to cost him friends. I want to nip it in the bud before he hits his teen years. I frankly don't know what to do. A pre-teen bossy boy is the pits. Any suggestions
 

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Has he had arguments w/friends or lost friends because of his bossiness? If so, is he aware of the problem? I think bossiness may be one of those personality traits that will be hard to change at his age unless and until he experiences the natural consequences of it -- friends who temporarily distance themselves, acquaintances who tell him to buzz off, or something like that.

Is his bosiness disrespectful of others, or is it good-natured bossiness (if that makes sense -- I know what I mean but I'm having trouble articulating it
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we have one who is bossy, even when she has no idea what she's doing. She can't stand to follow instructions, no matter who they come from. she also has trouble relating to her peers and bullying seems to be following her. I can't help but think there might be a connection.

My husband has no problem with this as long as she does what he says. He thinks it is a leadership quality. I think if you don't know what you're doing but you try to call the shots anyway, you're a pretty lousy leader!

have you had any success in dealing with this, or is it still the same situation?
 
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