[Childishgoth]

Hi,
Im not sure if this is the correct place to post this, so im posting in 2 places and hoping for the best. I just had my first child 2 months ago and due to medical problems I am unable to produce more than ½ an ounce to an ounce of breast milk, because of that I am using an sns feeder (and occasionally a lact aid nurser) to nurse my baby. It is my understanding that they are primarily used by adoptive mothers. I was hoping to find someone who was using/ or is using either product with their babies.
Its been a tough road for me ad im just looking for others who have already faced it

Thank you

 

[steph]

Welcome Childishgoth! I've been using the lact-aid nurser for the past 3 1/2 years with my dd. I can probably answer most any question - what's going on for you when you say "tough road"? Yes, using a nursing system is time consuming - if you don't have enough units it seems like you're forever cleaning them! Also, w/newborns there's the keeping the formula cold until ready to nurse then heating it up - esp. at night. There can be lots of hassles for sure, but it's worth it, imo, for the bond that nursing can bring. And it's great that you can even produce a little bit of bm. It took me about 3 months or so to get to producing what you do now. Anyway, let me know how I can help! Best wishes!

 

[T. Elena]

HI there and welcome! Just wanted to suggest that you try the forums at the Adoptive Breastfeeding Resource Website at http://www.fourfriends.com/abrw. There are plenty of women there with extensive lact-aid experience.

Are you having a specific problem? Or just need general tips and support? There's a downloadable tip sheet at the http://www.lact-aid.com site that might be a good general resource, if you don't already have it.

Good luck!

 

[Laurel]

1/2 to 1 oz was the most I ever made too in 5 months of trying to induce lactation.

As long as your baby is comfortable with the nursing supplementer you can continue to use it indefinitely. My baby was having a lot of problems nursing (I now think it was undiagnosed reflux) and he got the point where he just couldn't tolerate the lact-aid. But I would have continued with it if it had been possible.

The lact-aid system is considered far superior to the sns both for stimulating your breasts to produce milk and for making it more "authentic" for your baby. The sns makes it too easy for your baby to get milk from the tube, which keeps them from sucking properly. There is definitely a learning curve when beginning to use the lact-aid, but over time it becomes routine. I had six lact-aid units and got to where I only had to clean them once a day and could do all six in about 20 minutes.

 

[Childishgoth]

Hi, Thank you all for replying. I guess im having more of physiological issues with all this. I mean i guess i looked foward to breastfeeding through my whole pregnancy and it was just a real slap in the face to find out that i would not be able to. luckily i kind of can with the sns feeder but there for some reason is still a saddness in me not to be able to do it the "regular way." and im scared about not giving him the immunities he needs and all the positive things that are in breast milk.
I was wondering how did you all handle being out in public and feeding your babies. I mean do i need to excuse my self to the bath room to hook up the feeder ad then feed him. I'm just not comfortable hooking up the feeder infront of people. I dont like the way that people react. the nicest reaction I have had alot of people say "oh so hes adopted", but most people tend to stick with the "whats wrong with you, why do you have to use that" and my favorite.. oh so one of you is deformed" .. still haven't figured out what that comment is suppose to mean.
I also wasnt sure how to handle long term feeding, should i keep giving him formula or someone suggested just switching to actual milk in there after he turns 1 year old.
and i was wondering if he sees other babies being fed will he start to wonder or ask questions on why we have to use it.
I guess im jsut kinda confused about things like that
thanks you

 

[Leatherette]

Childishgoth,

Sorry that people suck.

I did not use a SNS, but I nursed my bio son and could not induce lactation for my daughter before we adopted her, so we bottlefeed. But my son never asked about other kids and their methods of feeding. He was just interested in getting the goods for himself.

Do what works best for you. Hope some of the moms who have used lactaid/SNS can help you out with some stealth methods.

Another

L.

 

[Laurel]

I've heard most everybody say that the lact-aid works better for long-term nursing. I think the lact-aid is more conducive to NIP. Supposedly the bags can even be slipped underneath your shirt and hidden so no one knows you are using it.

Personally, I never got very comfortable with NIP with the supplementer, but a lot of that was more my baby and the challenges he had nursing. I did not like the bag under my shirt because I always felt like I would accidentally squash it and get soaked with milk. When I was out with him I tried to find private places to nurse. Another problem was finding places to warm the bags of formula. I mostly got good comments from people, like how neat it was that I could actually nurse. I think since I'd adopted I went into it with different expectations than you did, so I expected the extra attention and for me, just being able to nurse any way at all was thrilling. The most awkward place I ever nursed was a LLL meeting just because I was so intimidated about being different.

I doubt your baby will notice much about his being fed differently until he's much older. He will just know that this is his reality. If anything, he will think that your way of doing it is "normal" and everyone else is different. Even though my ds wasn't able to keep nursing, I take every possible opportunity to point our nursing moms and babies to him and to teach him that this is how it's done. I plan to dwell on the fact that he *was* nursed and the commonalities between him and other nursing babies rather than the differences. I already know that I will be having to explain to him how come my uterus didn't work and my body couldn't grow a baby, so explaining that mommy couldn't make milk doesn't seem so intimidating.

 

[Heavenly]

Hi I can be of help. I am breastfeeding after reduction surgery. I used a lact-aid (also tried the SNS and the lact-aid is SO much better) for 16 months. I still view it as my daughter was 100% breastfed because although it was 100% breastmilk she was fed 100% at the breast. I don't have a lot of time now but I will post again later. Oh and I nursed in public with it all the time. And if you want the success story she is still nursing at 25 months!

 

[Childishgoth]

aww you guys are so great. my husband actually asked me if i had gotten a nap in today because i just looked so much happier. Its just nice to know im not alone, as silly as that might sound thats how i felt. Its great to know that its doable and that others have had so much success.
and Laurel you are right i guess my situation is alot simpler to explain, thank you for putting things in prospective,

 

[Childishgoth]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heavenly I still view it as my daughter was 100% breastfed because although it was 100% breastmilk she was fed 100% at the breast. months!

this is the best comment that i have heard i think everyone using a supplementor (sp) should read that.

 

[steph]

Regarding NIP, what I did usually was keep a few bags of formula in a little insulated tote that fit in the diaper bag (small yogurt cups worked great for keeping them upright) and a small thermos of hot water to take the chill off of them. I always wore a pouch (I almost never took it off except to wash it!), so I'd just slip the warmed bag of milk into the pouch and just sort of get the tube in place as I was latching on. It gets easier with practice! If I felt a little uncomfortable about exposing myself a bit (I'm not real modest so this was almost never a problem for me) I'd drape a blanket or my maya wrap sling over me until we got everything squared away and all latched on.

I'm sure your child will not view the way they nurse as odd - dd is 3 1/2 and still nurses. She's seen other kids have "boobie" in the usual bio way and has never once asked about why we use the lact-aid. It's all still "boobie" to her!

Also, about switching from formula to regular milk - that's what we did (soy milk actually as dd is a bit intollerent of cows milk) after a year and we had no problems. I think it depends on how much solids your little one is eating at that point. Dd got her teeth in real early and was way into solid foods, so I knew she was getting enough nutrients all the way around.

While it can be hard to reconcile the sometimes difficult realities we have to face as parents versus our idealized desires, in the end we just have to accept what we've been given. As someone who wanted to physically experience pregnancy for 14 yrs. - studied midwifery, and was enthralled by the whole physical aspect of pregnancy and birth, not being able to maintain a pregnancy or give birth was a hard let-down to say the leaste. But, for me, being able to nurse was the one thing I held on to. I must admit I've done it as much for myself and my own needs as my daughters. It's something I've worked very hard at - despite how challenging it is. And it is challenging! I've always maintained that adoptive breastfeeding - or using a supplementer regardless of the cause, gives you all of the hardest parts of both bfeeding and bottle feeding, yet none of the conveniences that both of those have. Still, if I was ever to have another, I'd do it all over again. It can be so amazingly sweet.

Best wishes to you and your family. Keep us posted on how it's going - and do check out the "fourfriends" site mentioned above. While it's for adoptive moms, they're a sweet bunch of ladies who have lots of info to share. I'm sure you'd be welcome.

 

[Childishgoth]

*sniffles* i am so glad that i posted here. thank you so so much. and your advice has been so great, im going to send off an order for that pouch today. I didnt order before because it did not seem important. but could you explain to me about the yougert cups? did you just have the bag in there or a fully assembled unit. I only bought two units iim guessing now i should have bought more.

 

[T. Elena]

so glad you're feeling better! In terms of how many lact-aids to have, I think you'll be very VERY glad to have more than two! A lot of the experienced women say you should have six or more.

As for the yogurt cups, I have a hunch the person who recommended that found them to be a good way to keep the filled bags upright (helps prevent leaks) and, of course, the cups would help contain leaks if they occur! Sounds like a good system to me, and I wish I had tried it.

In terms of insensitive/stupid/clueless comments from people, just brace yourself because you're gonna get them, and just remind yourself that those comments say more about the person delivering them than about you or your baby! (And I can't imagine your child will ever feel different or "weird" about the lact-aid -- kids have a way of assuming their circumstances, whatever they are, are the norm.) Couldn't believe the "deformed" comment. (wha???!!!) It's amazing what comes out of people's mouths! I suppose they could have been thinking about a physical problem that was interfering with b'feeding (cleft lip/palette, short lingual frenum, inverted nipples), but . . . hello? "Deformed?" Lovely. Now I've heard everything.

Take care and take heart. Every mother-baby feeding relationship is different, none are perfect, and every mother just has to do the best with what she has. If you're producing any breastmilk at all, you are helping provide immunities to your child. No one knows for sure how much you need to produce to provide the "full" immunological benefits of breastfeeding (some in the adoptive breastfeeding community cite 4 ounces as a magic number, but I've seen the math behind that, and it is very suspect, IMHO). They do know, however, that the less b'milk you produce, the more concentrated it is in terms of immunities. Just do your best and remember that, ultimately, loving your babe is the most important thing!

 

[HotMama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by steph While it can be hard to reconcile the sometimes difficult realities we have to face as parents versus our idealized desires, in the end we just have to accept what we've been given. As someone who wanted to physically experience pregnancy for 14 yrs. - studied midwifery, and was enthralled by the whole physical aspect of pregnancy and birth, not being able to maintain a pregnancy or give birth was a hard let-down to say the leaste. But, for me, being able to nurse was the one thing I held on to. I must admit I've done it as much for myself and my own needs as my daughters. It's something I've worked very hard at - despite how challenging it is. And it is challenging! I've always maintained that adoptive breastfeeding - or using a supplementer regardless of the cause, gives you all of the hardest parts of both bfeeding and bottle feeding, yet none of the conveniences that both of those have. Still, if I was ever to have another, I'd do it all over again. It can be so amazingly sweet.

Me too, me too! I was also training to be a midwife when we began to think we'd have a less simple route to parenting than giving birth. We are in the adoption process for dc number two and I will definitely be tandem nursing...woohoo! I am also doing the Newman-Goldfarb protocal for making more milk this time around, even though I don't ever do pharmaceuticals. If I can have fewer milk chores, it will be way worth it.

I've been using the Lact-Aid for two and a half years...we switched from homemade goat's milk formula to plain milk (either raw goat milk or org. whole cows milk) at about 22 months, even though dd was eating well...of course our formula got simpler as she got older. I now only supplement at naptime, since I don't want dd to get much of my own milk as I start taking birth control pills (estrogen, yikes!) on the protocal. She doesn't nurse much these days, between being too busy and me keeping my shirt on since it's winter.

On modesty, I nursed all the time for dd's first 6 months. She had some weight to gain and nursed all the time. I am also I social person, so we nursed at the library (baby storytime, all the babies were nursing), walking around the farm market in the sling, at music festivals, etc. I got pretty bold, with dd ready to nurse, I could usually tune out the folks around me...I've since heard so many encouraging remarks (I obviously live in a more BF friendly place) about how comfortable I made others feel about what I was up to...I had many conversations with little ones about my "contraption."

Oh yeah...traveling. We used the cooler thing Lact-Aid has for a while, but it's too big for an afternoon outing and too uninsulated for big trips. For short trips we use a smaller evenflo cooler someone got free at the hospital with a frozen juice bottle (plastic odwalla type with water inside, don't fill all the way!) and we use our little igloo cooler for big trips...you never know how many bags you'll need on a flight, in traffic, etc. The cooler is also handy as they get older for snacks that benefit from cooling.

Big hugs to ward off the clueless comments, and kudos to you for giving your child the many benefits of nursing.

 

[steph]

Glad some of this info is usefull for you!! Re: the yogurt cups... yes, they're for keeping the bags w/units all assembled upright and kept from leaking. I usually kept anywhere from 2 - 4 units/bags in there - depending on how long I was going to be out of the house. Travelling was trickier. The insulated bag I had could only hold about 4 units (It was a small thing), but I'd try and cram as many as I could without risking a major leaky mess!

As far as getting one of those pouches - I made mine from an old sock and some ribbon. Just cut the toe out of an old sock - roughly the size as a lact-aid bag, poke two holes on either side of the opening and tie with ribbon long enough to hang the pouch between your boobs. cheap and easy. Where I spent my money was on the actual nursing units. At one point I had about 10, which sounds like alot, but it really made things so much easier. I would clean them all at once durning the day - which I discovered, if you put an finished empty one back in the refridgerator, it cleans alot easier! I'd make up as many clean ones as I had - usually close to all 10, and kept them ready in the fridge - again in yogurt cups or drinking cups - anything to keep them upright. Also, if you haven't discovered this little trick, it helps keep the leaking/syphoning action down if you blow a little air back into the bag through the nursing tube before you wind the tube around the neck of the unit (did that make sense?).

Best wishes!!

P.S. HotMama, congrats on getting ready for #2!!!! You're brave to do the protocall (sp.)... I just couldn't do the drugs! Just fennugrek and blessed thistle - though I found that lots (and I mean LOTS) of water made the biggest difference in the amount I produced. With dd at 3 1/2, I don't even try to produce milk anymore - though she sometime will tell me there's a little there (and I think she's fooling me and just being silly - I doubt if there's any milk in me!)

 

[HotMama]

Thanks for the sock idea...I never used the pouch, but I'm gonna try it next time, if I need to supplement...how's that for wishful thinking! It was sure a pain the couple times I was out without the strap.

This is a bigger yogurt container, right? 8oz?quart? That would take up less space in our fridge than the bag hanger, which isn't even designed for the bigger bags we've been using for the past two years or so.

 

[steph]

In the fridge I'd use the larger - like quart size containers - or even like a tupperware type bowl. In the cooler for going out, I'd use the small 6 oz. upright (as opposed to the squat) kind. I never could use the bag hanger thingy - it just didn't work for me! And the pouch was essential for me! I actually made two, so I could wash one and still have one on. I never took it off, except for the shower. That way, when dd was ready to nurse I didn't have to look around for it (it sucks to have a hungry, screaming baby and searching desprately with one hand while holding her in the other). Dd wanted to nurse NOW, so I had to keep things real simple and quick! Hope that helps!