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If this baby is not your first, is there anything you know already that you plan on doing differently this time, whether it's to do with pregnancy, birth, or baby care? I've been thinking about this a lot. Now that I've been through it all with DD, and learned so much, I'm starting to think of things I'd like to do differently on purpose this time.

For example, I know I want the birth to be different. Also, DD had oral motor control issues (well, she still does) and never learned to latch, so I was an exclusive pumper. I've learned a lot since then about what I could have done to help her, and I WON'T not nurse this baby.

I'm also kicking around the idea of trying EC, although I'm not totally sold on that yet, and I know for sure that we'll co-sleep right from the beginning-- with DD, I didn't bring her into my bed until she outgrew her cradle at around two months old. I'm not bothering with the cradle this time.

And this time around, I'm not going to be in such a big hurry for the next milestone. I want to slow down and really savor this baby's infancy, because there's a good chance it might be my last child.

Anyway, I was just thinking this over and thought it might make an interesting discussion.
 

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Great post!

I am trying to eat healthier this time around. I gained 40 lbs last time, and I am very short, so I felt like a beach ball with arms last time. I ran up until 27 weeks last time, but I didn't exercise as often as I could have; I guess I felt that if I wasn't running, it wasn't worth it, so I didn't walk or do other exercise.

Last time, I went from first contraction to transition in 2-3 hours, and I was so shocked by the pain that I had an epidural. I actually had a wonderful experience with the epidural--no problems at all, and was able to enjoy the birth with dh more. But now that I know what it feels like, and I know that it won't be several hours of that same intensity of pain, I might do this one natural. I am open to either way at this point.

I definitely agree with savoring each stage once the baby is born.

Oh, and I am not going to be in a rush to weat maternity clothes this time. I got so sick of them.
 

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hmm, The only thing I can really think of is I want to cloth diaper from day one. with ds I didn't start till he was about 6 months. I have already started making some tiny diapers. Oh, and I am going to be even more catious of whet the ped tells me. I didn't listen much with ds anyway, thank goodness. They told me I had to give him formula at 2 days old or else he would have brain damage from jaundice, which he neve0r had. But this baby, if they keep insisting on tests, I will say no and go with my instincts, which were right on last time.
 

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I'm not vaxing this baby at all. My son was vaxed for his first year before I stopped. Some were delayed a tiny bit, but I shouldn't have vaxed him at all, and I really regret it. This one won't get any shots.
I'll start cloth diapering sooner with this one. I started CDing my son when he was almost a year old. I hope to start at birth this time.
I'm going to beg family members to finance a cleaning person for that first year of my baby's life - maybe even starting during my pregnancy. I worried too much about having a clean house. Maybe not too much, since I have dogs and a cat, and that hair really needed to get up. But, I wish I'd been able to be more relaxed about it, and it hadn't been such a point of contention between me and DP.
I plan to get out and about more this time. I was so worried about NIP and dealing with the baby outside of the safety of our home that I didn't get out nearly enough. I think I'll feel more pressure to get out this time since I have a 4 year old to take care of, and we won't be able to stand each other if we're stuck inside all the time.
I have more faith in my body now that I've birthed my son, so I plan to be more relaxed about labor and delivery. Especially labor. Prodormal labor had me all sorts of freaked out last time. This time, I'm just going to let my body do what it does.
I'm definitely going to trust my instincts more. Less checking up on everything in the books, and more just trusting myself to know if there's anything wrong.
That's all I'm coming up with so far, but I'm sure there's more!
 

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I will seek immediate and aggressive treatment for post partum depression, assuming I get it (and I do assume that)

That's all I can think of right now

Oh, excercise throughout my pg, and get out of the house ASAP with the babe.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Yo Becca
I will seek immediate and aggressive treatment for post partum depression, assuming I get it (and I do assume that)
: Avoiding another round of PPD is high up there on my list, with prompt treatment being my plan if it does strike again.

I also am thinking about having an IBCLC on hand at the birth to help with bf from the start because that was a nightmare with ds.

Other things - CD'ing from the start, considering part-time EC, and a aiming for a home water birth instead of a the birth center. I definitely want a henna tattoo this time (I've come to terms with my stretch marks and my good friend now has a travelling henna tattoo business
), and I plan on asking for all sorts of help instead of pretending I can do everything myself after the baby's here.

I better start making a list.
 

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I'm not sure a person has control over this, but I am going to try not to put on as much weight as I did last time. I estimate I gained about 60 pounds...I quit counting after I hit the 50lb mark and that was at 34 weeks. My body hurt so badly carrying around all that extra weight...I know that being 9 and 10 months pregnant is hard on a body anyway, hoping maybe with less extra baggage it'll be easier??

Since I know what I'm getting myself into, I don't have to be anxious over natural labor and birth. I think there will still be some nerves or dread as the time arrives, since it does suck and it is really hard work, but I remember very well how ones desire to have that baby out of your body overwhelms any fear you might have about the pain. Yes, it gets that bad, not to scare anyone!
:

I agree with not rushing into maternity clothes...but I say that, and then know how crabby I get, and wearing comfy stuff makes mama happier, so maybe I won't hold up to this one. We'll see.
 

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I am trying to stay in better shape for this pregnancy.

I am also limiting foods during pg and breastfeeding that my second son is highly allergic to.

BJ
Barney & Ben
 

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Not become hugely obese. I went from about 140 to 190 with my first, then got preg with my second when oldest was 6 months old. That one I was alot better, 185-206 (at birth, 190 at 1 month PP) but I still started at an obese level for my heights (5'3'')

I weigh about 135 right now and, though I don't want to be obsessive about it I want to have a strong healthy body and not need XL maternity for my A$$


I also plan on it just being better stress wise- because I am not in a god awful marriage, or going through a divorce.
:

Healthier food, exercise, meditation, more focused on my babe and my family, rather than all the crap I had to deal with through the last times!
 

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Avoiding PPD is always at the top of my list. I had severe PPD after my first and while pregnant with my second decided that nothing was worth suffering through that again - even if it meant I needed serious drugs and had to bottlefeed.

But, by some grace of god or goddess, I was spared after my second was born. A bit of baby blues that first week, but that was it. I think the biggest key was that I forced myself to get out of bed and brush my teeth and then find friends. When Dd was a baby I never left the apartment and I had NO friends in our city. We moved into our town three weeks before Ds was born, and within weeks of his birth I joined MOMS Club and Holistic Moms Network so I could get out of the house. It worked. Now, three years later I have a great bunch of friends and lots to do. PPD is never too far from my mind though, but I feel like this time I am more prepared to deal with it.
 

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Healthier food
More exercise
Less stressing out/anxiety
More natural birth
Enjoy each stage of babyhood
No shots at all (ds had his 2 mos shots)
No circ
CDing from the start
More babywearing
Less stressing out/anxiety
 

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Mavournin,
I strongly feel that a lot of PPD is the hard adjustment to the major lifestyle change that becoming a mother is- and dying to your old carefree self. You might have done better second time around because you were already used to it and you had formed a network of friends. I think social isolation strongly contributes to it as well.
At least that is how I felt in my case. After my first baby was born, I had a hard adjustment. It wasn't until I made friends with other moms and started getting out of the house every day that I felt a little more normal. After the second, I didn't have it at all because my social network was established, I had this motherhood thing down, and I had learned what I was capable of doing, even with a baby in tow.
I am not sure we were designed to bear and raise our babies in our individual isolated familyettes... I think in the case of early childhood, living in a village or commune or large extended family would really help with PPD....
Not that it exists for many, but I do have one friend who lives in an attachment parent co-op in minnesota... wow!
 

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I'm going to drink alot more water while pregnant. I had preterm labor with my first, and one of the reasons may have been dehydration.

I'm also going to have DH get the baby to sleep more often. My son is 19 months old and doesn't want a thing to do with daddy after dark. Its mom or nothing! I've nursed him to sleep since day one. I don't regret it, but there are times I'd like to do something different.
 

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what a great question! I've been thinking about this alot lately...

During Pregnancy/Labor
- not get caught up in reading so many books of how to do it 'right'
- don't overplan the birth -- things that i never could have imagined went wrong (we're all fine now!); things that i stressed about were a piece of cake
- give myself a break! i couldn't breastfeed due to a number of issues (flat nipples which my DD sucked til they were scabs; no milk let-down at all due to excessive hemmoraging and other medical issues). I still feel guilty about this. i just need to get over it!!
- treating my GD - i will definitely closely monitor my diet and blood suger. i will NOT be pricking my fingers 15 times a day again!

After the birth
- like many of you mentioned, treat PPD fast
- do a better job of meeting more mommies in my neighborhood
- become a stay-at-home mom (went back to work when DD was 4 mos)
 

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Chillmom,
I personally think that friend-making would be even better if you did it before the new one arrives. That way the social network/support is already lined up... they might even bring you dinner after the baby arrives! (wonderful)

Also, you can get with an IBCLC or LLL leader and start working on your flat nipples now so that they are ready to go when your baby arrives. Just because nursing didn't work out the first time doesn't mean history has to repeat itself.
 

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Well this time around I'm going to try for a vaginal birth (no choice last time with an emergency pre-labour c-section).

I'm going to try out various slings/baby carriers until I find one that works (last time I just tried the baby bjorn, hated it and gave up).

I'm going to try to exercise more during my pg.

I'm going to take prenatal classes (I signed up too late last time, lol).

I'm going to find some sort of mommy/baby group to hang out with and just try to make more friends with babies/kids in general.

I'm going to get everything I need to get done done sooner this time. My last baby came at 37 wks and I wasn't completely ready.
 

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I thought of one more thing...I got 7 cavities while pg with DD. My pre-preg. dental appt and while-preg dental appts were fine, but when I went after she was born - 7 cavities. I'm planning to be super vigilant about dental care (I want to be clear - I'm a regular brusher and pretty good at flossing, but I'll be adding in listerining and trying to floss more and brush whenever the urge strikes)
I'll also be increasing my calcium intake. I was hesitant about overdoing it with milk with my first pg. I'm not going to go crazy, but I'm going to drink at least a glass or 2 a day, plus other calcium sources.
 
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