[luv my 2 sweeties]

What do you think? I have a new friend whom I like very much. We have really hit it off and have so much in common. I haven't had a very close woman friend for some time, so I'm very happy about our relationship!

She has an almost 6 y.o. dd in Montessori and a 3 y.o. ds at home. She would *love* to homeschool -- talks about it a lot, reads homeschooling books (torturing herself), says she agrees 100% with every reason I give for wanting to homeschool. BUT, she says she can't do it because she doesn't have enough patience. I don't feel I know her well enough yet to either agree with her or to just tell her to lighten up!

For now, I'm not questioning her self-evaluation -- she knows herself and her kids much better than I do. But I've been trying to let her know that there are methods of homeschooling which do not require the mom "teaching" the children. I think that's where she gets hung up. (I've suggested she read Holt.) When I watch her with her kids, she seems great! She points out interesting things, helps them discover answers to their questions, etc. Anyway, I just feel at a loss when she starts to talk about HS. She badly wants to give her children the advantage of HS, but just doesn't feel up to the challange. I kind of had the impression that anyone could do it who wanted to, as long as you find a method that works for you. Maybe not?? I don't want to insult her, or make her feel even worse that she does about having her kids in school. I'm hoping that as our friendship grows, we'll be able to talk about it with better knowledge of eachother. I'm wondering if any of you can identify with someone like her?

 

[SagMom]

I think that WANTING to homeschool is the #1 most important thing. If someone really wants to, they can find a way, and if you want it to work, you'll try different methods until you find what works.

Maybe your friend is just nervous--my oldest went halfway through 3rd grade in school because I wanted to pull him out, but wasn't sure I could do it. If this is the issue with your friend, then just being there for her and talking with her as you've been doing might be just the support she needs.

OTOH, I've met people who've said they wanted to hs but couldn't because ____ and it was just an excuse. For instance, "I wish I could homeschool but I have to work." I'd offer info on how they might hs and still work, but it was met with disinterest. Or..."I'd like to homeschool but I want my kids to go to college" and again, I'd give info which was dismissed. So, sometimes I think people feel the need to have an excuse as to why they're not homeschooling.

 

[Jacobs_Mother]

I love home schooling,I have been 3 years now since my son was 4.I to thought i didnt have the patience to do it but with gods help SURPRISE i am doing it and LOVE IT. You never know JUST how much opatience you have till you try it

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[Jen123]

I honestly think that more people could homeschool if they put their mind to it. Seeing how there isn't a right or wrong way to homeschool they can easily adapt hs'ing to their lifestyle. I would not have the paitence to school at home. I know my limits.

And I agree some people feel the need to have an excuse as to why they won't homeschool. It's almost like they feel guilty they aren't and don't measure up to those who are. I don't know why but it always comes across that way. I've lost a few 'friends' who thought about homeschooling , asked me about it and then decided not to. They won't look me in the eye. They have this really guilty look on their face.

 

[phathui5]

I don't think that homeschooling your kids requires more patience than being home with them. If your kid is home with you at age three, what's so magical about four or five that you need to send them off to school? How do you need more patience? I think I would need more patience to deal with my three year old than say, a ten year old.

I think a lot of moms get hung up thinking about homeschooling as school at home. But I think that homeschooling is easier than teaching in a classroom. You don't have to dela with 20-30 kids. There's a lot more flexibility with stuff like your schedule (if you even use one) and what resources you use to teach. If you're getting stressed out that day, you can take a break.

 

[Jacobs_Mother]

I agree ,If you can raise your child well think of it you are already schooling him/her

so why not go father and not put your child in public school but keep homeschooling him/her.
It is only as hard as you want it to be.Look at it this away, you WILL know what your child is learning,and who the child/children are around and do not have to worry about violence in the schools

 

[Openskyheart]

I took a long time to come to the realization that I could do it. We tried homeschooling for a little while early on. I hadn't really decided to homeschool yet, though. We had chosen it at that time only because public school had been such a disaster for my son. It was more of an interim solution. When he was accepted to an alternative private school, we went for it. Eventually, we took him out of that school and started homeschooling. At the point we started homeschooling this time (2 school years ago), I was really committed. I'd done a lot more research, lurked on these boards and others for a couple of years, talked to other homeschooling parents, etc. We had also seen for ourselves that even a good public school, and a great private school were lacking in comparison to what we could do as homeschoolers.

Just keep doing what you do, Stephanie, and listen to your friend when she needs to talk about how rotten school is for her child (I am being a little facetious here, but only a little

). She'll see the differences for herself, and if she wants to learn more about homeschooling, or wants to try it for her family, she'll have a good friend to turn to.

Just this week two friends of mine called - one with an 11 year old son, and one with an 8 year old son - who wanted more detailed information about what we do and how we do it. They're both considering homeschooling, and our experiences have influenced them.

It's all good.

Laura

 

[sleeping queen]

Patience isn't one of my virtues but I've homeschooled my oldest through 6th grade and plan to continue through high school.

Maybe your friend is lacks the confidence in her ablilities to hs her child. She could just try it for one year to see how it works. Her child is young enought that not being in school for that year really isn't going to hinder her in the long run. I started out just to do kindergarden and here I am 7 years later.

 

[lilyka]

My kids have been learning math and reading while i have been learning patience. I have none. But it is growing. Still miniscule. And we are striving for a pretty structured education (it actually helps all of us).

It never hurts to try. if she is a collasal failuer she can always put her kids back in school. What has she lost. (