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Can I post here? *UPDATE* in post 11 :)

923 Views 15 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  girlie1125
Hi ladies. My name is Jeannette, and I'm hoping its ok with you that I'm here. I've been posting on a PCOS message board on another site, but its been offline due to technical issues, and I just really need some folks to talk to right now.

I've been ttc since January, and while I know that's not 'long enough' to qualify to be here, I've found that my circumstances are different than most of the "ttc" area people's seem to be.

I'm 27, have PCOS, though it doesn't seem I've had issues with IR. DP Crystal and I decided in January to start trying. Of course, we can't just BD our hearts out, so that's one of the reasons why I guess it saddens me to hear of the folks who can try whenever they want.

My cycles were usually pretty regular. Long, but regular (about 35-40 days). All of a sudden, AF disappeared. She was supposed to come in mid-late January, and nothing.

I had my first appt with the RE and got prescription for Provera and Clomid 50 in late Jan. AF finally came on 2/21. Had an HSG (omG the pain!) on 2/26 and was taking my clomid for days 5-9.

Went in for my day 14 u/s yesterday, and zip, zilch, nada. *sigh*

Which I should have expected. I know. But for some reason I was really feeling like this would be it. I'm so utterly crushed.

So, I'm on the Provera again, this time will be Clomid 100s. But I'm extremely frustrated at how long it all takes. I started the Provera yesterday, but it will still be around 14+ days until AF even shows up, and then another 14 days after that for u/s.

Also after reading someone else's post about healthy/unhealthy way to pass the time, that was totally me. Looking at baby names, birthing options, birth stories, baby furniture. Of course, since yesterday, I can't stand to look at it. Telling myself "you're not even &%$#ing pg, stop acting like you are". But I really think it was about trying to be informed, in control, and feel some iota like I can affect the outcome of all this ttc mess.

I'm wondering if there's anything else I can do, really do (other than eating and exercise) to help this. I've seen some posts about licorice root, etc. But won't that affect the Clomid I'll be taking? Is there anything else I can do?

I understand that most of you have been doing this for waaay longer than I have, and can't even imagine your heartache and frustration. I guess since DP and I have to go through all the meds and u/s and IUIs that most ttc'ers wait a year or more for, I just feel like I'll be more comfortable posting here.

If it would be better that I don't, I completely understand
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I welcome you here! I hope you get the info, resources, and support you need. I think that part of the pain of infertility is that you have to do all sort of extra things to ttc. I often resent the trips to the Dr., the RE, the cost, the stress of ttc. I am extremely grateful though for my dd that I have an realize the blessing. I am finding it much harder this time around that I am taking dd to all the appointments. All the while my 3 SIL's are pregnant with #2's with no 'inconvience' at all.

Blessings on your road to parenthood.
Hi Girlie,

I'm sorry to hear of your PCOS diagnosis--I have stage 4 endo so I sympathize with the interventions often necessary for conception. I'm glad you found a place to land while your regular support network is down. You might also try for more resources specific to PCOS and ttc.

Best of all to you,
Hi girlie1125,

Welcome! I was just diagnosed with pcos recently, and we're also dealing with some male factors. It is incredibly frustrating to hear people talking about ttc the "regular" way when we have to jump through so many hoops!

I know how crushed you are about not having any follicles. That happened to me in Dec., and I was just despondent. To be soooo hopeful, to do everything right, and have NOTHING there. Well, I had a zillion little follicles (cysts), but those only make things worse! I just kept sobbing, and my poor ds(4.5) decided that the only way to cheer me up was to tell me he didn't need any brothers/sisters, that I could just have him. Which was really really sweet, but just made cry harder.

Some of the ways I try pass the time is to focus on eating a low-grain/low-sugar diet and trying to keep an exercise routine going. I thought about taking other supplements (I'm already taking extra folic acid and b6), but I'm too nervous about them interfering. I have also tried so many things on my own over the past several years, that I'm just waiting this out, too.

What kind of light noise is in your bedroom? The things I've read recommend sleeping in cave-like darkness either the entire month, or on cd13-17 leave a dim light on in the bathroom/hall/closet to simulate moonlight. If there is too much light where you sleep, it can disrupt your body's natural rhythms. This is supposedly supposed to help your body ovulate around cd14/15.

Best wishes to you. I hope your stay here isn't long!

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Thanks for the welcome

I never thought about the light in my bedroom...hmm...not too much...but definitely not cave-like! Would wearing a sleep mask help?
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It probably would. I've read that anything from street lamp glow to the display on your digital clock can interrupt things.

Here's a link to an article about it that I bookmarked. You have to scroll down a bit to get to the part that talks about lighting.
Girlie, I've only been TTC for 9 months... but I'm seeing an RE, hubs and I didn't see the point in waiting a year to see the RE when we know there's a problem.
And the no follicles thing is so freekin' hard to deal with, it's like all the pain of the drugs and the emotional build up for nothing. Breaks my heart..
sigh anyhow I"m sorry I have no advise, just a friendly ear, or eye.... kwim?
good luck!

Originally Posted by girlie1125 View Post
DP Crystal and I decided in January to start trying. Of course, we can't just BD our hearts out, so that's one of the reasons why I guess it saddens me to hear of the folks who can try whenever they want.
i think you should BD your hearts out!!!! why not? + it's great for stress. just because you are a lesbian couple doesn't mean you can't enjoy great babymaking sex!
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Well sure! We have been BDing, but I hear so many BFP stories where the RE thought that particular cycle was a no-go, but through regular old BDing, couples got pg anyway, despite the odds! Its just frustrating not having that extra shot at it.
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Have you spoken with the doc about Metformin or something similar? It supposedly helps regulate the hormones that are so out of whack with PCOS, and usually is one of the first things recommended from everything I've read. I was on it for 3 months before conceiving (and through the first 12 weeks). I know the wait is hard, and then every month waiting to see if it took or if you have to go through it again next month. I was lucky enough to get follicle growth at Clomid 50 (thankfully, since it turned me into a raving *****), but unfortunately, my ovaries wouldn't release them.

I will second the recommendation on diet. My doc wanted me on a "no white stuff" (sugar, flour, potato, rice, etc.) diet as well as the Metformin. I have no idea whether either the diet or the Metformin had any effect on it, but I'm not going to argue with the outcome, ya know?

Best of luck.
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My ob-gyn had put me on the metaformin for PCOS. However, when I went to my RE, he told me to get off of it. So, I've been off of it.

I have never really had much of an IR problem, glucose tests are always in the normal range, etc.

Of course, now that I've gone through a cycle and the 50s didn't work, I'm second guessing everything and wondering if it would have been different if I'd still been on the met. I don't know if it'd be good to start it all over again now (against RE's wishes) or what. Bout to start a new cycle, and I guarantee if this one doesn't work, I'll be asking RE some hard questions about the Met.

Also, as a bit of an update (I've posted bits of this in other threads, but it seems like new threads have lots of trouble generating responses, so I'll add it here).

As I've said, my cycles before all of this are typically pretty long (40 days or so) and I am pretty sure that I usually O very late in my cycle, if at all.

Last cycle, AF started spotty for the first 3 days before finally going full force on the fourth day. RE said I should count the last day of spotting as CD1, and take my clomid 50s on CD 5 - 9. Of course, at u/s, RE said no good follies. I've finished my Provera, and RE put me on clomid 100s for CD 5-9 again this cycle.

I know at the u/s last cycle, one follie (at least) was 10 mm. I think they typically look for at least 14mm (help me out here, is that right?). At around 14mm, they'll keep an eye on it, come back for another u/s a few days later. The "goal" is about 20mm or more to have a good follie, do a trigger, and IUI. (right?)

Now, I kinda feel like if I'd just had a few more days last cycle, that follie would have looked much more promising. I've seen LOTS of women ttc that were on Clomid or Femara and O'd on CD 20 or 26 and get a BFP. I feel like that strict CD 14 u/s might be a bit too short for my body.

I plan to deviate from RE's directions this cycle. I'm almost positive AF will start off spotty for at least a day or two (if not three) before showing full force. I'm going to count the first day (even if spotty) as MY CD1. When AF shows full force (prolly about 3 days later) I will make my u/s appt for 14 days after that.

So that alone gives me up to three extra days before the u/s for follies to grow.

I also plan to take my clomid on CD 3- 7 instead of 5-9. I'm debating, though, whether to start on MY CD3 or RE's CD3 (probably 3 days difference between the two.

I've never really heard the real, medical, reason behind RE's giving clomid on CD 3- 7 or 5 - 9 (as mentioned in the other thread), so its entirely possible that this is a huge mistake, but I'm not aware of it. If anyone can enlighten me, please do so.

Also, if I take the clomid on MY CD 3 (spotty or not), then its actually me taking the clomid about 14 days before the u/s. (stay with me here)

If I start the clomid on RE's CD 3, I'm taking the clomid 11 days before the u/s.

If I stuck with RE's original instructions, I'd be taking the clomid on RE's CD 5, and thus taking it 9 days before u/s.

So, I'm trying to figure out what day to start it on. MY CD3?, RE's CD3? I really feel like I don't want to take it on RE's CD5, but if anyone has any arguments to present as far as pros or cons of this, I'd be grateful to hear it.

So, what do y'all think? Good plan? Crazy hare-brained scheme? Asking for trouble, or increasing my chances?
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they U/S on CD 14, saw a 10 and just dismissed it? Am I understanding that right?

Uh-uh. If you had a 10, you had follicle growth. My first cycle I had U/S on CD 12, CD 14, CD 15 or something like that, before they triggered the release. The second cycle, we didn't bother with CD 12, since obviously I needed the extra 2-3 days. If they're not following that 10 for at least a few days, I'd question that. Especially since you're coming out of pocket for treatment.

I would also ask why he took you off the Met, see what his reasoning was for that, since it seems to be the standard first step with PCOS.

And I took my Clomid on 5-9. If you want to take it 3-7, I would use his day 3, and not count those first couple days of spotting.

I think I followed. I was perscribed the 5-9 route and I didn't get anything, but I did on the 3-7 one. Then I went to Femara, and did another 3-7 and got lucky (as in a follicle), but no pregnancy
This time I was Femara cd 3-10 and I see the RE tomorrow and I hope that there are more than one...
On my 2nd clomid cycle I had a 12mm follie, and when I went back 2 days later to check again, it was gone, I didn't ovulate it just went away. Apparently they can do that. Sigh.
As for O'ing late, with Clomid I O'ed CD 21, and the 12 mm was cd 21 also... Last cycle on Femara I O'ed on cd 14.
Anyhow sounds like we have similarily messed up systems...
I'm gathering from my RE that all of this is "normal" and can be expected in all of this.
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Dea please let me know how it went today! It does sound like our bodies are similarly fubar'd

Hmm...I guess that makes sense that they could just disappear like that. It just seems to me that to do one u/s as early as day 14, find a 10 mm follie and dismiss it is too...rash? I can't imagine how big that follie might have gotten by day 20, if it hadn't disappeared.

I do think that I will start the clomid on the 'official' CD 3 this time. (3 days after full flow AF starts). That seems like a safe compromise to me. I still get a few more days, and I'm only altering the doc's plan by 2 days. I will also demand to be told exactly how big any follies are, and if they seem like they might have a fighting chance, will request a follow-up u/s a few days later. If the follies are still puny, or have disappeared by a few days later, then at least I know for sure that the meds didn't work for me that cycle, and NOT that doc was just to impatient for my slow follies
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Girlie, I'm sorry I didn't check in. OMG it went really well it was 23mm on cd 13! I nearly jumped off of the table when she told me that. Whoo hoo. So I was given the trigger shot and now I wait. Ohh I hate the wait. I commented on another one just now about Femara, I think I like it better. Makes me so much bitchier, but I'm having better luck with it.
Yay!!!! When will you test? I've got my fingers crossed for you over here!!!

AF is now just *barely* getting started, so I'm waiting til she shows full force to start my clomid on CD3. Not getting my hopes up too high this cycle, though. *sigh*
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