I have 21 mo. b/g twins. They are just starting to get into the twin thing of one kid doing one thing and the other wants to get into the act.
Most mischevious behavior like flipping the sippy cup over to drip water/milk out so they can finger paint the table for floor I can handle w/o going too crazy. My biggest problem is dealing with the stove.
My DD for the most part listens to me when I tell her to keep away from the stove and happily occupies herself with something else. My DS, on the other hand, is testing his boundaries with leaps and bounds and simply ignores me. When I am at the sink or stove, he tries to open the oven door (which is also badly child-proof locked to the corner lazy susan door). I tell him to step away from the stove it is dangerous and you could get hurt. I will turn him around and try to get him intersted in something else. Now he struggles when I turn him around, he looks up at me, giggles, and pushes ME (He's a big kid) out of the way to go back to the stove. He is tall enough that his hands can touch the burners and the childproof guards will not work with this stove due to it's age. When I try to distract with, for example giving him some bowls and wooden spoons to play with the table top stove at the other side of the kitchen he shows no intersest. I also tried the sponge and spray bottle, nada. Clearly he is trying to get a rise out of me. If it keeps up, he twin sister will begin to get into the act and I need to nip this thing in the bud now!
It has gotten so bad that we had to turn off the stove altogether (it is electric) and frankly, I am sick and tired of microwave meals. I do not let DS play with the stove even when it is off, but it is a never ending battle of wills!
I have tried the positive discipline as best I could but I am two steps away from trying to time out method since I failed to get him interested in imitating housework (trying what I would guess is Waldorf parenting). Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
i didn't want to make it completely off limits because it isn't *always* dangerous. i explain to ds (17 months) that ovens can be very dangrous when they are on. i turn the over-the-stove light on when the oven or burners are on and i point it out to him. he knows when the light is on, it is dangerous.
other times i do let him touch the door or play near the oven. i try to keep him from opening the door and pulling the racks out though.
i have pulled the burner knobs off. ds does have access to them but can not get them back on. when i am cooking on the stove top he will get out a knob, so we each have one
i think the fact that he has some access to it makes it less appealing.
sounds like you son likes to see your reaction too.
My kids are allowed to touch the front of the stove (we're kinda Waldorfy too, so they "clean" it for me with a sprayer), but I have the knobs off and they are not allowed to touch the top where the burners are. (Occassionally, when it's cool, a hand will sneak in that direction and I just remind them they could get very hurt.) I always try and cook on the back burners whenever possible.
As soon as they could move on their own, I would ask them to "move away please" whenever I had to open the oven door (even if it was still cool). Same thing for when I have to pour boiling water (I'm terrified I'll spill on them.) They move to stand in the kitchen doorway till I'm done. (I say "all done! thank you!") And, obviously, I explained why.
So, if one of them was determined to get into unsafe territory with the stove, I would agree with the pp that a gate is in order at those times. It's really not negotiable since it's a serious safety thing.
You might also think about your tone of voice in explaining why he's not allowed to touch. I've found my kids are really responsive when I'm not only all business about a topic, but also demonstrating sincere (sometimes drama queen) concern/worry that they might be hurt.
Also, maybe your distraction just isn't enticing enough. For my son, interesting means MESSY. Like water, or dry cereal or rice to stir in a bowl, or something like that. Maybe getting him up on a stool at the sink or counter would me more interesting than the stove for him.
could you try working on the concept of hot with him
maybe get a bowl of water and make it really hot, not hot in a burning way but not comfortable hot, i guess what i am trying to say is safe hot and just maybe help him to touch it with one finger and talk about how hot it is and how the oven is a lot hotter and would burn him
maybe he would just ahve a good time and throw the water around and this is no help at all
i was just having a pre-coffee wonder!
but maybe if you could help him understand the problem the hotness it might help
As a pp said, I let ds play with the stove when it is not on. He opens the door and pulls the racks out, and pretends to cook things on the stove top, (he's an expert pancake maker.) We remove the knobs when not in use, so he doesn't turn it on. He knows when the oven is on because he can see the red light, and he stays WAY back if it's hot. Before he made the red light connection, I would invite him to touch the side of the stove when the oven was on. It was hot but not burning hot, and he could feel the heat of the oven without getting hurt.
Maybe you could allow your ds to feel the heat? It is very obvious to ds when our oven is on, because heat radiates from it if you get close.
I also let ds help me cook and will hold him and let him stir things on the stovetop, (usually before they get too hot, in case he splashes.) This seems to satisfy his curiosity.