[kjs]

Anyone else a nervous wreck? I am 13 1/2 weeks pregnant and have heard the heartbeat 3 times. Everything is going well according to my midwife, but due to a miscarriage last year I am so terrified of something going wrong again. I can't wait until I can feel kicks, because then I will get some daily reassurance. I almost miss morning sickness! I started telling people, and now I am terrified! I want to enjoy this second trimester, because I usually get very uncomfortable in the third trimester. This will be baby #3, and i am the most nervous this time around. Anyone have any tips on letting fears of something bad happening go?

 

[Friendlee]

Oh honey, I can't imagine how hard it would be to let those fears go after a miscarriage. I suffer from anxiety from time to time that leads to panic attacks and it is debilitating and really does a number on our bodies.

Guided visualization CD's (used with headphones) seem to help me tremendously. There are lots that deal specifically with anxieties.

Also, EFT therapy (Emotional Freedom Technique) is something that was practically made for this type of situation. It feels a little silly at first, but it can be extremely helpful. The first time I tried it, I was practically rolling my eyes in doubt the first couple rounds and then I suddenly burst into tears. It really releases pent up emotions and helps you feel more in control - and anxiety/stress occurs when we are losing our control. There are some you-tube videos that show you the points where you tap...the tapping along with a personalized script will help you to tailor the technique to any painful or fearful situation. You can have someone do it to you, or you can do it to yourself. I've done it really quickly in parking lots, in the bathroom, lying in bed...anywhere.

The only other thing I can think of is to be regularly talking with other people who are in your position. This board alone has eased my anxieties tremendously just because I don't know what the heck is going on with my body and somehow, hearing that other women also don't know whatthe heck is going on with their bodies, comforts me. And the laughs that come along with it are nice bonuses!

 

[Pookietooth]

I am in the same boat, having had a m/c last year as well and being on the older side.

to you.

 

[Krystal323]

sending you zen-vibes

 

[kjs]

thank you so much for your thoughtful responses, they are very helpful!

 

[fyrebloom]

When did you miscarry? I know alot of mamas feel better when they get past that point with the new baby. I M/C before conceiving my twins and once I got to 6 weeks (and heard the HBs) I began to relax. I agree, meditations, pos affirmations, all good for your stress. Go make yourself a cup of rrl tea and talk to your belly, it always helps me

.

 

[threadbey]

: Here with you. I have had stretches of not being too worried, then suddenly a switch flips and I'm convinced something's wrong again. I thought it would help to get past 8 weeks, when I lost my earlier pregnancy, then I thought it would help to get out of the first trimester (which it did, a little) and then to hear the heartbeat (which it did, a lot, but as the weeks pass between my appointments I get more and more worried again).

I have on my list to get the Hypnobabies home study course. I'm planning to use their techniques for labor, but I also think the "studying" will be relaxing for me. I have used the one track they offer for free online (I don't have it bookmarked, but it's somewhere on the Hypnobabies website) and it was definitely helpful in relaxing. I understand they have more "affirmations" about how everything is going well in the course. The free track is purely about relaxing. I had a guided meditation cd with DS (Journeying through Pregnancy and Birth by Jennifer Houston, I think I spelled the name right) and it was great. But I listened to it before my miscarriage, and when I listened to it once this time it did not have a good effect on me, just worked me up because of that association.

 

[kjs]

We seem to be in the same boat! Now that I am in my second trimester I have days in which I allow myself to get excited, and then I have days in which I am sure that I will see blood every time that I pee. I think part of it is a "loss of innocence"- I no longer take it all going well for granted. This has caused me to be more grateful for my blessings, and my two wonderful children, but I can't help but be envious of my pregnant friends who are telling everyone their baby's potential names and buying baby clothes!! I think I will probablly burst into tears when I feel that first swift kick in the bladder- just like I did when I finally heard a heartbeat! Thank you for your advice- I will definitely try hypnobabies, I was planning on trying hypnobirthing techniques anyway. Blessings to all of US!

 

[threadbey]

 

[lil_stinkyfeet]

I had two miscarriages prior to this pregnancy, I know how you feel.

 

[pjs]

I'm right there with you. I had an ob appt at 12 weeks- we hadn't told anyone yet, but since Easter was going to be in a few days, we wanted to share the news. I "asked" if she were me, would she share and she said definitely. My ob said once you hear a hb at 12 weeks, your chance of m/c drops dramatically. I was happy for a few days. Now, I'm obviously showing and have started to tell those not in my immediate circle- the checkout lady at the grocery store, etc, and I'm really terrified that something will go wrong. I've heard the hb multiple times, had 3 great looking u/s and will have a midwife appt on Friday.

I think since I just hit 13 weeks on Sunday, I'm nervous that I wasn't out of the first trimester officially before I started telling everyone. I'm telling myself everything is fine and I'll feel better once I hear the hb on Friday when I'll be almost 14 weeks. Then within the next month the movement should start (though I have felt the occasional pang here and there)