Mothering Forum banner

1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
170 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Last summer I fostered a cat, Fozzy, who's previous 'owner' was going to put him down for crying at night. Everytime Fozzy cried, she gave him attention, and he kept crying. I took him in, ignored him at night for two weeks, gave him lots of attention during the day, and after two weeks, the crying stopped.<br><br>
He was adopted, and started crying again, so I told his new mom to do what I did and it worked.<br><br>
This was before I read about CIO and I know cats are not people but was this cruel? Necessary?<br><br>
At the time I saw it as "Fuzzy learns that when he cries, he gets pet so he needs to learn that he gets pet when he doesn't cry"<br><br><br>
I have another problem with my new foster dog who has separation anxiety. He cries and howls like crazy when we're not home or if we go upstairs. We've been taking him for long walks, entering and exiting the house for short periods of time. He seemed to be getting better, staying asleep downstairs, while we slept upstairs, until 6 am. I can deal with getting up at 6am, but its been getting earlier and earlier. This morning it was 3:30am. I let him outside to pee, then I let him upstairs hoping he'd be okay with sleeping on our floor. He still howled!<br><br>
We ended up closing him in a room downstairs where his howls wouldn't wake me or 3.5 mo old DS for about 2 hours. I feel horrible about it, I was getting so angry from my lack of sleep. He's whining now and I'm 3 feet away from him!<br><br>
We're going to a holistic vet tomorrow, maybe we can try something for him......<br><br>
He's a big cry baby, a huge Shepherd/Akita mix. He's very sweet, very loving but he needs to be okay to be by himself....We were planning on adopting him but he's really driving me crazy and right now I want to find him a furever home.<br><br>
His previous foster home he cried during the day, and they had two other dogs. I'm going to ask her about the night....We don't have other dogs, just 6 cats who hiss at the dog.....<br><br>
Any advice?<br><br>
Thanks!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
718 Posts
I have no advice because my dog was the same way when he was a puppy and still has issues with separation anxiety now. Crate training was a complete and utter failure with him because he would literally scream/howl and work himself up into a sweat no matter what we did to help soothe him. He slept on my bed when he was tiny because otherwise he just cried. Thankfully he grew out of that and he will now sleep happily on his own bed. We can't leave him anywhere other than our house because he flips out and starts screaming and will run after us howling. DH and I typically leave through the garage door, but if we leave through the front door he starts howling.<br><br>
Leaving the tv on helped a lot when he was little and just spending lots and lots of time reassuring him that we were still here. To this day I can't go anywhere in the house without him following me.<br><br>
I really hope it works out for you!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,642 Posts
Don't think of it as CIO. Dogs do not attachment parent each other, it makes no sense to them; they don't thrive on it. Dogs feel good, safe, and secure when the rules are made absolutely clear and consistently enforced with the exact same consequence every time, and they have a need for exercise that most people have a very difficult time understanding. It may be helpful to remember our origins--we are primates, constant groomers/touchers, thinkers, close-range foragers, constant eaters, independent. They are wolves, rare touchers, rare eaters, long-range trotters, and being alone means quick and painful death.<br><br>
It's absolutely true that an approach that doesn't reward bad behavior will work on dogs. Dogs won't expend calories if it doesn't work and/or doesn't feel good. So if the behavior doesn't get them anywhere, they will end it on their own. Where you can't just ignore bad behavior is when the behavior is comforting or useful for the dog; these are self-rewarding and won't go away on their own. The big self-rewarding behaviors for dogs are digging, barking, chewing.<br><br>
In this case, where he's worried and whining, I would put the crate near or in your room. That way he will feel part of the pack. But I would absolutely resolutely ignore any noise from the crate for the 6-hour period you choose (10-4, midnight-6, etc.). If it NEVER works, and the dog doesn't need to whine or bark to comfort itself because it is alone, he'll start sleeping through the night. And then you stretch it to 7 or 8 hours. Eight is the absolute maximum I would ever do, though.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
170 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thekimballs, that makes a lot of sense. I'll try the crate in our room tonight. Thanks!<br><br>
Aries, thank you too!<br><br>
I'll update tomorrow how it goes.<br><br>
Thanks!
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
Top