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Right now, dh and I are living apart during the week. He's at his sister' s house because it's close to his new job, and we're at my sister's house (because there's no room for us at his sister's- he sleeps on the living room floor) which is an hour's drive away. He comes home Friday night after work and goes back Sunday evening. Things have been really hard for me, but he seems content. This is a temporary situation- we were supposed to be saving up money to buy a house. We haven't saved any money so far (we've been here 2 months already) so I say why stay? I told him last night that we needed to be out of here by July 1st. He seemed surprised by this, even though I have been telling him for the last month that we need to get out. When I told him that the other night when he took the kids for a sleepover at his brothers I has seriously considered getting in the car and driving away- and not coming back, he just said "That would be a ball out of left field" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/confused.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Confused">:<br>
Well- it wouldn't for me. This is not something sudden in my mind, and it's not something that is a passing whimsy. I am truly unhappy right now, and my husband doesn't seem to care.<br>
I guess this is just a vent. I just needed to get it out.
 

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Sounds like a very stressful situation. I have never stayed at relatives for an extended amount of time with kids, but I imagine it can't be easy. (My oldest is special needs (ODD) and most of my family has nothing but critiscisim in regards to his behavioral issues.)<br>
Wow - your husband doesn't sound like a team player. Living with relatives is supposed to be a <b>temporary</b> arrangement, in order to save money. I agree with you - if you're not saving money, why continue staying there?<br>
I can tell you one thing for sure: if my SO were to say to me "I feel like driving away and not coming back" I'd take that DAMN seriously! Sorry to sound so harsh, but he needs a wake-up call. You are stressed out meeting the needs of your 3(?) children during the week, and your goal is to buy a home, and parent TOGETHER. He is not doing his part in making that goal a reality. I would suggest counselling, but that may not be a realistic solution, due to $$ and distance issues. Maybe sit down together (without kiddos, if possible) and write down a savings plan; how much you will put away each paycheck, and how long it will take you to save the amount you need for your down-payment (or whatever). Then do your best (read - your husband) to stick to that plan relgiously.<br>
(((((Hugs))))) to you, Khris. You've been dealt a difficult hand in life, but from what I've read from your posts, you are also the best equipped to deal with that hand. I will be thinking of you, and I hope your situation works itself out.<br>
Oh, and for what it's worth, I too have felt like getting in my car and driving far away.......not very AP, I know, but true none the less.<br><br>
China white.
 

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I'm sorry.<br><br>
I wish I had a ton of advice. Right now I am away from DH during the week and it is hard on us in different ways. but it has definitely strained our relationship (and we dont have kids yet).<br><br>
I agree with China that you guys need to sit down and discuss the situation, finances, how you are feeling, and whatever else needs to be said.<br><br>
good luck
 

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<div style="font-style:italic;">. He comes home Friday night after work and goes back Sunday evening. Things have been really hard for me, but he seems content.</div>
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He's basically a single guy again, I'm not surprised he seems content. You're the one dealing with the kids all the time.<br><br>
He really needs to know and understand that this is NOT working. Make sure you're clear about that, not saying vague things and thinking he should get it. Good luck.
 
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