It's scary, but I'm finally doing it!
I've been lurking since the very beginning so I know you, but you don't know me...kinda creepy, eh?
Anyhow, I am Tracy and I am pregnant for the fourth time. My ds 1 turns five on Sunday and my ds 2 turned 2 2 weeks ago (
). We lost our 3rd baby last October. I was somewhere around 27 weeks pregnant.
We do not use medical assistance unless it is quite needed. We prefer unhindered birth (UP/UC).
So...it's been a strange pregnancy so far. I am guessing that I am somewhere around 17 weeks, based on most the information I have gathered so far. This contradicts the negative hpt I took at the end of Jan. and the negative blood test I took a few days later.
I have a history of false negative hpts, but not false negative blood tests (not that I've gotten blood tested before).
My fundus and the increasing frequency and intensity of movement are part of the strong evidence for the around-17-weeks guess.
We have not chosen to go for further testing/ultrasound. This is hard for some people, who know all of my circumstances, to accept. I have had no desire for u/s for several reasons, one of which is that I have no desire for a repeat performance of the last u/s I had in October last year. I have figured we will know one way or another at some point, such as when I started feeling movement or, yk, when I give birth, or whatever. I *do* understand that it is hard for others in our life, however, they have not walked in my shoes. I am feeling more confident now that I am having movement daily and it has started getting stronger. Though, there is that old saying that the only sure way to know you are pregnant is when a baby emerges from your body!
![]()
We have not come out to many people irl. Most know that we suspected pregnancy and had a negative blood test. But we have left it at that with most everyone (in other words, we have not acknowledged that, at this point, we firmly believe me to be pregnant). My poor MIL can barely stand it when we come over to dinner and I am wearing maternity clothes.
She wants sooo badly to ask.
So...pretty weird, huh? You can see why it has taken me so long to join in.
We haven't told our boys yet. I am sure we would have been hesitant about that even if there were no confusing issues associated with this pregnancy. They took the loss of our baby very hard. It is actually rather amazing that ds 1 hasn't noticed yet. I secretly wonder if he knows but hasn't allowed himself to "know" yet.
Okay, not feeling exposed now or anything...
:
But also glad to be joining you. Maybe it's okay to start getting excited?
