[~Megan~]

I know that the things she says are a reflection of what she is feeling about herself but its still hard to take sometimes.<br><br>
She's often made comments like, "Make sure you keep yourself up so that your marriage stays good." Or other such things.<br><br>
The past week I've been really sick and my throat is so sore I couldn't eat much of anything nor did I have an appetite.<br><br>
I mentioned on the phone to my mom today that my throat isn't sore anymore so I can eat solids again but I still don't have much of an appetite.<br>
She says, "Good! That's great! Well, I know you are nursing so you need to eat some but it will be great if you cut back."<br><br>
I know I'm over weight, but she could be a little kinder about it.<br><br>
Of course her idea of eating well means a bowl of cereal for breakfast, skipping lunch, and Diet Coke and salad for dinner.

 

[ThreeBeans]

Lovely <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:

 

[KatWrangler]

Ouch. That was pretty harsh of her to say that.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:

 

[Doodlebugsmom]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: See, I think it's exactly that type of talking by mothers and other family members that cause so many body image disorders and eating disorders. I'm sorry that she said that to you. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I grew up hearing that type of comment (not ever really directed at me) from family members all the time, and I have pretty severe body image disorder, and have had disordered eating in the past too.

 

[oliversmum2000]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: why does she say these things - does she seriously think she is helping??

 

[Jay'smom]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I often wonder why mothers say these kind of things to their daughters. My mother (who is a good 100 pounds overweight) comments on my weight. Granted, I could and should lose weight, but, really, who is she to criticise? Really, should anyone make comments like that? Especially to someone you care about.

 

[Rach]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">

 

[LavenderMae]

She's wrong for that. Just because someone is overweight it doesn't give others the right to discuss your eating habits. I could give you several examples of things like that my mom has said over the years but I'll spare you. It's never helpful and always ugly to comment like that.

 

[GoodWillHunter]

OMG, Megan, yes I know exactly what you mean. My mother also does those passive aggressive things... "You look so much better now that you've put on some make up and nice clothes."<br><br>
Huh? Talk about backhanded complimenting. Let's box our mothers up and send them somewhere. Like... Antarctica?

 

[~Megan~]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Sheacoby</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7961672"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">She's wrong for that. Just because someone is overweight it doesn't give others the right to discuss your eating habits. I could give you several examples of things like that my mom has said over the years but I'll spare you. It's never helpful and always ugly to comment like that.</div>
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Exactly. And its not that I don't eat fairly healthy. Its that I'm not active. I know it and know what I need to do to change myself if I want to do it.