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I have had two missed mc's in the past year and I feel like I have lost this babe too. I just don't know where to go from here. Can anyone tell me success stories after so many mc's? Also did you ever find out what was causing your mc's? If I new I would end up with a sticky baby I would certainly keep trying, but I'm afraid a 3rd mc may be all I have left in my heart. I have a sono on Friday, but I don't even want to go in at this point.
 

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Why do you feel like you've lost this baby? If you have a sonogram on Friday, that must mean you've made it to around the 6 week mark, right? That sounds great! Have you had your hcg checked?<br><br>
I say all this because I have had three miscarriages. I'm reading messages here because I'm pregnant again and, of course, having a hard time not freaking out. But my initial hcg levels rose really nicely, and I've had no spotting, so I'm feeling pretty good about it. What else can I do? My sonogram is next Wednesday, so I'm just trying to hang on until then without going nuts!<br><br>
Don't assume the worst!<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Yes, I am stalking...<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br><br>
First let me say that I hope, I hope that this is it for you <b>enigo</b>.<br><br>
I do think I know where you are coming from. With my most third pregnancy, I couldn't get excited about it. I couldn't get attached to it.<br>
I didn't want to set myself up for a fall. I spent the whole time on edge.<br><br>
I think that what you are doing is trying to protect your heart. And I think that is natural. The joy and innocence of pregnancy is lost, and all that is left is anxiety.<br><br>
I hope it's not cold to say this, but statistically only about 1% of couples will have 3 consecutive miscarriages. So even after 2 losses, the chances that you will have a happy bouncing babe are EXCELLENT. Much, much higher than the chances of another loss.<br><br>
Anyhow, I am certainly rooting for you and your bean, and I am hopeful Friday will bring you great news. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/goodvibes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Goodvibes">
 

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Discussion Starter #4
I'm 7 wks today. Just that any symptoms I may have had have completely disappeared. Boobs are all but back to their normal tinyness.<br>
With the other two mc's this is what happened, symptoms disappeared first.<br>
With the first mc I didn't know I had mc'ed until about 11 wks when I began to spot, I never did have cramping until a week after the spotting. Finally mc'ed at 12wks. The second I had a sono at 7 1/2 wks and there was no heartbeat, still took until 12 wks to complete. I just don't feel like I can handle the wait again.<br>
I didn't bother with the hcg since it was over 30,000 last time I miscarried.<br>
I just wish I knew what was wrong. I don't have a midwife appt until next Friday the 14th.<br>
Sorry, I just had to vent. I'm going stir crazy<br><br>
ETA Milkshake we cross posted <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> Your words really helped. I hope you are right. Thank you. I thought the same thing. I mean 3 in a row? (But that's what I thought after 2 in a row) Come on!<br>
I am so sorry for your losses <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> It's gotta work out for us.<br>
One of my best friends just told me she is pregnant today (8wks). She is puking every morning and doing great. I hope I can be there for her when she has new shiny new baby. I'll probably be under the covers somewhere!
 

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Thinking of you and hoping your u/s goes great
 

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Wishing you the best and hoping the ultrasound goes well today...<br><br>
After having had 4 missed m/c's, I think I can understand your anxiety. Try to stay positive (easier said than done, I know).<br><br>
Tracy
 

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Discussion Starter #7
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><br>
Thank so much. It didn't go well, no heartbeat...again
 

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I just checked back in and I'm so sorry to hear this news. My thoughts are with you.
 

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Damn. I'm so sorry <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">
 

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I missed this thread earlier.<br>
Enigo, I am truly sorry. It's a terrible loss and one of the worst feelings in the world. You don't deserve this.<br><br>
After 3 m/c I felt so lost and alone. Please know that a lot of people, IRL or not, do care.<br><br>
I don't have much advice. This preg seems to be going better for me, but I don't know if I'll get a happy ending either.<br><br>
I did have a lot of testing along the way, and what I learned did inform my decisions about if/when/how to keep trying. I'm happy to talk about it if you'd like.<br><br>
Please take good care. I am so very very sorry.
 

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enigo, I just saw this. So very, very sorry.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Dear Enigo,<br><br>
I'm relatively new to this forum but not to your pain... I've been where you are now and am so very, very sorry. One miscarriage and you think, well, I've already had my share of bad luck, it'll be smooth sailing from here on out. Two or more and you feel doomed but hard as it is to believe, you're not. Truly. Just the fact that you can get pregnant means there's hope.<br><br>
I wish you much peace and healing...
 

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Hugs, sweetie!!!<br><br>
There are TONS of success stories on here. Really there are. I experienced three losses in 2007- 20 weeks, 5 weeks, and 17 weeks. And we had no reasons or explanations for any of them. It was heartbreaking. But here I am, almost 23 weeks, and my pregnancy is going beautifully, although HEAVILY monitored. I go to a Perintologist every 2 weeks and have scans at every appt. I urge you to go to your doctor and ask for Repeat Loss testing to be done, and then go from there.<br><br>
Hugs, momma....thinking of you.
 

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I am so sorry, momma. I have been reserving my post for the outcome of your u/s today and I am so sad and sorry.<br><br>
I had missed miscarriages in August 2008 at 6w5d, January 2009 at 9w3d and March 2009 at 9w5d. We saw no heartbeats with the first two but the March baby named Tulia had a heartbeat at 3 scans.<br><br>
We did the RPL bloodwork and learned I have the MTHFR-A mutation and my Protein S was low but not "of clinical significance, per the MFM doctor. My research led me to pursue aggressive empiric treatment for recurrent pregnancy loss. I doctor-shopped until I found a doctor who would prescribe heparin injections for me. I took baby aspirin, Clomid and high folic acid supplementation with the January baby named Noel as well as Tulia so I wanted the next step moving forward.<br><br><a href="http://www.healthline.com/blogs/pregnancy_childbirth/2007/04/recurrent-early-pregnancy-loss-10.html" target="_blank">http://www.healthline.com/blogs/preg...y-loss-10.html</a><br><br>
I became pregnant immediately following the loss of Tulia. We saw a 13mm follicle at the RE appointment April 15, 2009 and went home to TTC. As soon as I got a +HPT, I injected heparin 5000u twice a day and took progesterone, baby aspirin, a prescription folate called Zervalx and a handful of supplements. I did the shots until 36 weeks and the progesterone through 13 weeks. My rainbow baby arrived Christmas Eve.<br><br>
I don't know if the regimen made the difference. I will never know why we got to keep Edelweiss and not the other babies. I am very grateful for the opportunity to use aggressive empiric treatment. Whether or not I "needed" heparin is debated by REs, MFMs, OBs and researchers. Research suggests that it helps some women with idiopathic RPL so I wanted to do everything possible to have another baby.<br><br>
I have come to explain my losses like this: The first loss shocked me. The second loss pissed me off. But the third loss broke my heart. It was an extremely difficult, dark, sad journey. I am so sorry you know this pain. It can be so overwhelming at times. There was no "legitimate reason" for my losses so the decision to try again was heart-wrenching. The pregnancy was also very hard and I suffered immense anxiety and fear. Now that I have my baby safe in my arms and my childbearing days are over, I am still not over what happened to me in those long 18 months. My baby is magnificent in my eyes and I am incredibly grateful for her but all is not forgotten. She makes up for a lot but the pain is still there.<br><br>
I hope with all my heart that you find your answers, your path. And I hope you get to hold your rainbow baby soon. I am so sorry for what you have suffered. I cannot know your pain but I offer you my sincerest sympathy. There is hope. You are not alone. Please call on me if I can be of any assistance to you.<br><br>
Sending you gentle hugs....<br><br>
Amy
 

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Discussion Starter #15
Thank you all of you, I don't know how I'd make it through without you all <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div style="font-style:italic;">I did have a lot of testing along the way, and what I learned did inform my decisions about if/when/how to keep trying. I'm happy to talk about it if you'd like.<br></div>
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I would love to hear about what you've done, please pm me if you'd rather not discuss it here. I know this is your rainbow baby!<br>
I just wish I knew if it was time to give up. Thankfully, this mc seems to be starting already. The past 2 took until 12 wks.<br><br><b>jtrt</b> <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I felt similar. The first mc was a shock and I was devastated. I had no idea anything was wrong. The second...Ohh man I was so sure it couldn't happen again, but I knew something was wrong from the beginning. I was pissed. This time. It can't effin' happen 3 times right?! I have been weeping off and on for two weeks because I knew I was losing the third. I do feel a bit more hopeless, even numb at this point. It's a good thing I have my son and I have to stay reasonably sane or I would be locked in my room.<br><br><br><b>Parker'smommy</b> Have you done anything differently this time? I'm so afraid to just try again unless I find out what's going on.<br><br>
I know there are so many success stories. I just wish I knew what to do next. Someone knows the next step. I know they do <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"> I just turned 40 last wk. I know I have a bit of time, but I really don't feel I have the time to keep getting pregnant and losing babies every few months. (or the desire)<br>
My accupunturist mentioned getting tested for immune issues. Natural Killer Cells. It is often a cause when there is more than one mc in a row. IN fact she mentioned sometimes it can rev up your immune system once you have one mc and cause problems with your body going haywire trying to protect you from your own baby. So the first may have been a randomo chromosomal issue, the the others may have been a result of an "immune system gone wild". (oooh they need to make a T-shirt!)
 

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Hey Enigo! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br>
Glad you're here.<br><br>
I'm glad it's looking like things might progress faster this time. If I may be blunt (and sorry if this is upsetting to anyone), personally, I think it would be a very good idea to get the embryo tested. Finding out if this embryo had chromosomal problems will help a huge amount with how you might decide to move forward. I wish I had that info for my first 2 miscarriages.<br><br>
So, if you're miscarrying naturally, try to collect whatever clots or tissue come out. Then take them to an OB/RE/MW as soon as you can. If you don't have one, you can probably call one attached to a hospital (since those will have good labs nearby) and explain what's going on and what you'd like to do. They should be able to help.<br><br>
It's a sad thing to have to do, but I think it will be very good info to have as you start figuring out what's going on. (fyi - the test can take 4-6 weeks to come back.)<br><br>
I can tell you more about my tests later, but if you're starting to spot now, I wanted to mention the embryo testing before you get too far along.<br><br>
HUGE hugs.
 

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Hi Enigo.<br><br>
I'm 39 and was 38 and 37 when I conceived my losses. Before trying a third time I worked intensely with an acupuncturist who tested my blood and found numerous issues with my kidney and adrenal function. Apparently I was suffering from a lot of stress. She had me come in once a week for acupuncture treatments, put me on herbs and a strict diet of no processed and mainly raw foods. I also started a rigorous exercise program and lost 40 pounds. After two months she let me try to conceive again and 37 weeks later, I'm about to give birth to my first child, a healthy girl.<br><br>
In addition to the Eastern medicine treatments, I also worked really closely with my OB. She had me take baby aspirin from 6-20 weeks and has monitored me really closely. I've also seen a perinatologist three times, just to check in on baby's development.<br><br>
I can't say this journey has been an easy one, I'm still very anxious and can't wait to hold my baby in my arms and know that she is alive and healthy - but it's a journey I had to make and one I hope you can as well. Please don't give up hope. Seek out the right people to help you along the way, both in the medical and spiritual realms. I wish you all the luck in the world.<br><br>
Nicolle
 

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Discussion Starter #18
You know I'd wish I'd done it the first two times too. I'm not sure about this one. When the woman did the ultrasound, it seemed there wasn't even a fetal pole. Last time there was. She said I was measuring 5 wks. (I was 7) coincidentally at 5 wks is when the few symptoms I did have disappeared.<br>
Not to be morbid, but if there isn't much of a fetus, can they still find out anything?
 

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Enigo, I am so very sorry. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss, mama. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>enigo</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15383623"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">You know I'd wish I'd done it the first two times too. I'm not sure about this one. When the woman did the ultrasound, it seemed there wasn't even a fetal pole. Last time there was. She said I was measuring 5 wks. (I was 7) coincidentally at 5 wks is when the few symptoms I did have disappeared.<br>
Not to be morbid, but if there isn't much of a fetus, can they still find out anything?</div>
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It's worth a try because it really will tell you a lot. The only risk is that they get your tissue mixed up with the baby's and you get the (always suspect) result of chromosomally normal female.<br>
There are so many unproven - and frankly discredited - treatments for MC but the most likely cause in an older woman (I'm one, too) is a random chromosomal problem. MC is sadly so common and the risk goes up when you're older so it just isn't that statistically unlikely to have had several.<br>
I really recommend the book Coming to Term by Jon Cohen.<br>
I'm waiting on testing on my second miscarriage and strongly suspect it will show a chromosomal problem. I was tested for clotting disorders etc. when my daughter was stillborn and it is an easy and low-intervention thing to do if you want to pursue it.<br>
I'm just so sorry. I'm just recovering from me third loss and however much I know intellectually that it's likely just bad luck, it's hard not to feel that something is just truly, deep down WRONG with me.
 
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