Mothering Forum banner

1 - 19 of 19 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
634 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi, I just found out last week that I am carrying twins. I have a 3 year old who will be almost 4 when they are born. I am a massage therapist (self-employed) and because we really need the money, I am trying to figure out if it's possible to leave the twins for 2 hours here and there to go and work. I was hoping after one month this might be a possibility, but am I crazy???? I am planning on breastfeeding as exclusively as I can, but I'm not against bottle feeding expressed milk here and there. Even if it's once a week, it would be helpful. Any ideas??? Thanks so much, this is such a great place to go to hear ideas from some great mamas!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,364 Posts
I think there is absolutely no way to know now - it depends on so many unknown factors.<br><br>
Personally, I was so sleep deprived there is no way I could have gone back to work. (I was a grant writer.) Also, my babies were frequent nursers and would never take a bottle of anything (formula or ebm), so I wasn't really able to got out without them till they were about 5 or 6 months old.<br><br>
But, it's possible that your babies will be "sleepers" and perfectly happy with a bottle of mama's milk. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
334 Posts
I went back to work when my twins were 6 weeks old. It was pure misery for all of us. I WOH 8 hours a day though, not two hours here and there. I've since quit my job and have been a SAHM for 10 months now.<br><br>
BFing didn't work out so my twins FF from 5 weeks until 1 year. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">:<br><br>
I think you can do it, the hardest part for me (aside from the emotional aspect) was reliable, safe childcare.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
74 Posts
If it is only 2 hours here and there you will be absolutely fine! It will more than likely rejuvenate you a little bit. I think by that point, and certainly by the second and third months, you will know when best to schedule appointments. It is not a crazy thought at all!<br><br>
I should add--my guys took bottles of mamas milk easily and were great nappers! I was lucky--no big issues.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
156 Posts
Congratulations! I agree with the PP, finding quality child care was a challenge for me. You absolutely need somebody who has experience in caring for two infants at once. Even if people (like family members) THINK they can do it, unless they've actually DONE it, they might be in for a surprise. Personally, I had NO IDEA how challenging it would be with two babies. I'm generally a pretty capable person, but caring for my boys in the first few months was by far the hardest thing I've ever done!<br><br>
I suggest you start looking for qualified caregivers NOW, just in case. After the babies are born, you probably won't have much time! I would also suggest that you line up A FEW different people so if your main person isn't available (or leaves to work for somebody else or gets pregnant, like mine did), you're not back to the drawing board!<br><br>
Enjoy the twin experience -- the beginning is rough but it just gets more amazing every day!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,809 Posts
Not "working" but I accompany choirs for my DH's school. My girls are now 4mo old, and I finally feel comfortable leaving them for 1.5hr here and there. I don't even leave bottles... I just tank them up before I leave.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,188 Posts
Well, since all twin moms are crazy, then yeah <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">:<br><br>
I think one month is being very optimistic. You will likely be very, very sleep deprived. You biggest challenge, as others have said, will be finding some sort of reliable day care. I would give myself a minimum of 3 months before attempting to leave kids to go to work. JMHO.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
876 Posts
I agree w/ one of the pp that said there's really no way to know right now. I went back to work part-time after 6wks only because my FMLA leave was up (I was on bedrest for 6wks prior) and we desperately needed the money. I was reluctant to leave them at first, but found that I enjoyed getting out of the house and having adult conversation and it was good for them to get to know someone outside the family. Child care will definitely be the hardest part and I'd agree to start finding someone now.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,695 Posts
My mother went back to work full-time 5 weeks PP with twins because otherwise she would have lost the whole semester. BUT as a college professor, full-time meant only several hours a day out of the house, she formula fed, and her mother was living in the neighborhood and helped out a great deal when it came to the older kids. What kind of support do you have?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
122 Posts
I went back to work 4 hours a week when the twins were 8 weeks old. I'd tank them up and they'd wait for me to get back. When they were 6 mos old I went "up" to 8 hours a week and now I work 12-15. They are 2 now. It has been great for my sanity!<br><br>
Yep, you'll be sleep deprived. In fact, the worst for me was when they were 4 mos old, since it had been going on for soooooo long all I wanted was 8 hours of sleep uninterrupted...... the first few weeks I was running on adrenaline~!<br><br>
Danielle
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12 Posts
I don't work outside the home, so take my comments with a grain of salt. Most of us remember the first six weeks with twins in only a blurry sort of way. I think I'd plan on going back when they were at least 2 months old.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
250 Posts
It's doable but I think I am insane. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
I went back when they were 3.5 months. I've been through 3 sitters (who only had to come to my house and sit 3 hours in the morning between the time I get off and DH leaves). This is very frustrating, and I agree with the PP about having this issue stamped and sealed. The last sitter I had was a "friend" who couldn't even remember the hours she worked and argued with us weekly about what her pay would be. Needless to say, I am no longer speaking with her.<br><br>
If you have family nearby, PLEASE utilize them. I have no family here and I so miss having reliable loved ones to depend on when I need them.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
459 Posts
I went back to work at 2 months reluctantly, but my leave was used up plus some leave without pay... and we needed my checks. DH stayed home with them for a year (and worked part time too), but that first month (when they were 2-3 months) my mom came out to help him. I think those first months its really helpful to either have a person per child, or one with 2 boobs...<br>
DH had to drive them during their naps almost that whole time! But they took expressed milk fine.<br>
Since they were 15 months I've been the stay-at-home and DH went back to work full, and we moved across country to be near grandparents (a LIFE saver).<br>
Working was fine though... except that I was constantly thinking about the boys and looking at their pictures and creating collages and going on chat boards like this one...<br><br>
anyway, in my opinion, 2-3 hrs here and there will be totally doable, but as your job is a physically demanding job consider waiting a little while longer!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
295 Posts
I'll be going back to work at least part-time by 3 months PP, and full-time at 4 months. I'm the primary income-earner in our family right now, and my husband will be at home with the babies. It won't be easy, but we don't have much choice in the matter.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,155 Posts
Be prepared for lots of different variables. Look for several different sources of care(part-time hours are ALWAYS harder to fill reliably than full time), look into staying home (look at your budget, etc. ), ask around for help if you are staying home AND still need help.<br><br>
But ususally we figure out a way to do what we need to do.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
175 Posts
I am a massage therapist, too! I had my girls when my son was 2. I think I did my first chair massage job post-birth when they were 3 or 4 months old - my husband brought them for nursing breaks because they'd stopped taking a bottle once they got home from the NICU and figured out how to latch on. It was hard - really hard. I think to aim for an hour or two here and there is a great idea, but maybe @ 1 month you are being optimistic.<br><br>
Do you have office space? Do you work somewhere where you have guaranteed clients? Can you take it kind of easy and market yourself out for spa parties or other "lighter" work like reflexology or chair massage? Is there any way for folks to come to you rather than you go to them?<br><br>
My twins will be 4 in February, and so their brother will be 6. I also have a 3 month old - I was doing a lot of chair massage gigs up until I was about 6 months pregnant and then I stopped. I am just now gearing up to start working again - I'm renting a 1/2 day in a wellness center starting in January (and it's cheap enough that I will probably not even use it in January - my goal is to start seeing clients there come February) and I'll be teaching in the evenings at a massage school once in a while. I have it worked out with both of these situations that at least in the beginning, I will only be working for 2-3 hours at a time in case the baby needs me.<br><br>
Good luck!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,013 Posts
HI,<br>
I think you will be in a sleepy fog for at least 2-3 months with 2 BF babies at night and all day. You can save money in other ways until you can go back by preparing meals ahead now and freezing them so you don't eat out. You should let your body rest a bit optimally for 6 months so your uterus gets back into place and your muscles can support the demands of massage work. I think the babies will thrive but you will need to look after yourself. A few hours away from you will not effect your milk supply but working while exhausted will. You will know when the time comes. I wish you happiness with your busy life ahead.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6 Posts
I have twin boys and have to return to work next week since my FML is running out. I am so dreading this! I will have to be gone for 10 hours during the day because of commute time. My boys will be 3 1/2 months when I return to work. I am not as tired as I use to be after having them home the first month. I think your body just gets use to the lack of sleep. I rarely ever even leave the house though and go for weeks without even going outside! It might be nice for you to have that excuse to get out for a little bit! Only you will know how you feel when the time comes.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,844 Posts
I certainly hope it's not crazy, since I don't have a lot of choice. I work part time (20 hours/week), as a nurse, and I carry the benefits for our family, since DH is self employed.<br><br>
When Rachel was small, I worked 32 hours/week, and DH stayed home with her, getting his work done in the evenings, weekends, and on my days off.<br><br>
For us, I think it's doable. I've already done the working/pumping thing, so that's old hat. Currently, our home is 15 min away from my work, so he could (theoretically!) bring the babies up to nurse. He will also have help from my best friend.<br><br>
I think you and DH have to sit down, and work out some 'guidelines' about who will be doing what at home (chores, etc). My DH was responsible for 'milk storage' ... which helped tremendously, as a working/pumping mom! I came in, sat the bag on the counter, and he took care of getting the milk in the fridge, cleaning up everything, and getting the bag ready for me for the next day.
 
1 - 19 of 19 Posts
Top