[sphinx]

7.5 month old ds has the most beautiful, happy disposition and he also is excitable and has tons of energy. He is the most loved baby you could find. However for the first 6 months of his life he literally cried NON STOP. Extreme gas and some other minor health problems seemed to influence this, but it was unlike anything I'd ever seen or heard of. Sometimes if I popped him in the wrap and went into town he would be okay for most of the day (he loves people), but then it would all come out when we got home. But whenever I put him down he would start to scream, or even sometimes while in my arms or the wrap he would just cry on and on.

He doesn't cry all day and night anymore, but has traded this in for more complex behaviors. Early on he became accustomed to nursing to sleep as well as nursing every hour or two, even during the night. This was tolerable, but now, for the past two months or so, he has been sleeping in 30-minute increments, night and day, and is sleeping less and less - some days, just two 30-minute naps all day - and will only go back to sleep if nursed. It takes me 30-45 minutes of nursing and shuffling around to help him fall asleep... for 30 minutes! He screeches and wails when he wakes up and realizes the boob isn't in his mouth or that I am not with him.

We all share a bed, so 5 yo dd is constantly angry and sleep-deprived b/c of this, DH and I beyond exhausted, are on edge and fighting, and we haven't had any time together in weeks, my nipples are raw, my back is killing me, I feel the tendonitis coming back in my wrists and thumb, I have no time to exercise or even get a massage and I am really feeling resentment towards ds whenever it's time to sleep. My eardrums are going to burst one of these nights.

i don't know what to do. we only have a tiny 2 room flat (smaller than 500 square feet) and no crib or anything and we can't both fit on the couch, so we really can't experiment with trying to let him go to sleep without nursie or motion, i would happily stay with him and rub his belly or whatever. I tried it when my dh and dd were gone for two weeks, and he cried for more than an hour. I just give in and nurse him after a few minutes of crying because I am burnt out and also we have neighbors in our building who I'm sure don't want to hear him screeching at 3am.

someone, anyone - please tell me a magical cure! What about baby-safe herbs for sleeping? Chamomilla does nothing.

 

[AugustineM]

Oh my gosh, mama, that sounds very, very difficult. I don't think I have any great suggestions, just a few thoughts. My DS is almost 9 mo and for the last two months slept only in 2 hour intervals, sometimes 1 hour intervals. If it's any consolation, he has started sleeping much better in the past couple weeks, just since he has paused on the teething and can crawl quite well now.

But it sort of sounds like something medical with your babe. Have you had a thorough check-up on him? I mean, could it be an ear infection, reflux, major teething, etc. etc.? Is he better if you try tylenol or motrin?

As a temporary respite, can DD and DH sleep in the bed while you and DS sleep on the floor in the other room? Or maybe DH can sleep with DS (or try it) while you sleep with DD. But it sounds like DS really needs you. Is there anyone that can come stay with the babe while you get a massage? I think you deserve it!!

 

[sphinx]

Thanks - you know, we're pretty sure it's nothing medical. Because he smiles amidst the crying and I think these patterns become habit very quickly. He's had ultrasound and xrays to make sure his intestines are in order (also had a herniated umbilicus which is fine now), has had some bronchitis but no ear problems, we've run the gamut of tests and he's been teething for months now (just has two on the bottom). I was sure he must be allergic to something so I cut out the soy and dairy, no change, brought them back, no change.

I have never tried baby tylenol or anything like that - I don't use those types of medicines (don't even have them at home) unless absolutely desperate. I guess I'm desperate now :LOL , but I don't think he's in pain. which would be the reason to give that kind of stuff, right?

Everybody tells me "boys are like this". Whatever that means.

yes, i do have my mother-in-law to take him while I go for a massage, and i am going to schedule one!!

 

[mandalamama]

Willow was like that during the day for a few months ... crying all day, but fine if we went out. never did figure out what it was! she has reflux, but she'd be smiling between cries and screams and not spitting up or "wet burping."

have you tried Hyland's teething tablets? Willow usually sleeps well at night but occasionally she'll have a few nights in a row of up-down-up-down in 30 minute cycles, with screeching. 20 minutes after the tablets, and with a binky to calm down the reflux she's churned up by crying, she falls asleep.

other than that, trying to think ... do you have The Baby Book by Dr. Sears? there's a checklist of possible causes of crying at night, with LOTS of stuff to go through. like, everything from illness down to uncomfortable clothes. if you don't have/can't get the book, i can type in the checklist for you.

 

[Felicitymom]

Oh boy mama... you sure have your hands full (don't we all :LOL ) I can sympathize to some degree. My baby (8.5 months) has just started a similar pattern of sleep, but she doesn't cry all the time... just needs extra attention due to the fact that she isn't sleeping as well as she used to. I attribute this to crawling all over the place, teething, excitement, etc....

Anyway... since you said your baby has cried a great deal since birth have you thought about chiropractic care for him? A great many babies (and moms) have to have multiple adjustments after a birth experience. I know one gal I know who had terrible problems with her newborn in the areas of sleeping (the baby wouldn't) and crying. AFter a few adjustments things improved a huge amount.

So it may not be medical in that there is nothing pysiologically wrong, but maybe its more structural?

Hope things get better for you.
Nancy

 

[addiesmom]

Big big hugs to you!

My DD was very much like that so I know that you need a great big hug - and some relief! For the first 4 months she would cry non-stop, and the only way she would sleep was ON me, even at night. I was so uncomfortable and sleep-deprived. She would want to nurse constantly, but when she was 4 months old, she started rejecting the breast altogether. She would latch on, then start to cry, gulp, cough and I noticed a sour smell on her breath. She had silent reflux (the kind where it would just come up a little, then go back down, so it was burning her both ways). The GI specialist that we took her to put her on prilosec and also suspected milk and soy allergies, so I took them out of my diet. Within a week I could see a major difference. If you suspect allergies, you need to take ALL dairy and soy out of the diet - that means careful label reading cuz dairy and soy go by terms that you would never suspect. Try it for at least 2-3 weeks straight, as it takes a while for the allergens to leave the system.

Good news is that she was only on the prilosec till she was 10 mos and she outgrew the milk protein intolerance by 15 mos and the soy by 20 mos.

It does get better - remind yourself that everyday! Good luck to you!!!!!!!