Mothering Forum banner
1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,040 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Here's the quick version. I live in Maine and my 7 y/o dd lives with her dad and stepmom in CA, she went to live with them when she was starting kindergarten. We all lived near eachother until they moved to CA 2 years ago. We are on OK terms and my parents get along with them really well.<br><br>
Anyway, my dd told my mom last night her dad hit her with a belt and left a bruise. Now she has been known to lie before. She even accused my husband of some abuse a couple years ago, which was definitely not true.<br>
I do not want to start conflict between her father and I over this, and if it came down to it, I probably would not win custody if we went to court because of my husband. Him and dd don't get a long and he has worked in a porn store and they know it. Other reasons too, I am clincally depressed and on disability ect...<br>
So do I just ignore this and hope she is lying or this is a one time thing. My mom is going out there on Christmas break and said she would "investigate" things further, but she also doesn't want to "rock the boat" and end up unwelcome there.<br><br>
Anyone know if hitting with a belt is considered child abuse in CA?<br><br>
Oh well, I'm enraged right now though...<br>
COrrie
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
11,770 Posts
Man, what a crappy situation. I know I would be seeing red, and believe my dd, but you also need to find out whether it's true. Do you have a good enough relationship with dd's father or stepmother that you can call them and talk to them about it in a non-adversarial way? Can your mom talk to your X, since your dd told her about it? I wouldn't wait until Christmas, that's 3 months away. Do you have an attorney you can call and talk to about what to do in this situation?<br><br>
I'm really sorry. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> You might also want to cross-post in Single Parenting to see what other mamas dealing with ex-h's advise.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
674 Posts
I would take your dd's word for it without a doubt, and be careful not to get her into more trouble.<br>
Poor thing.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,354 Posts
leaving a mark is child abuse in CA. Hitting with a belt is borderline- subjective. Call CPS, please. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
nak<br>
Lauren
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,912 Posts
unfortunately hitting with a belt isn't illegal in California, as long as it doesn't leave a mark. Please call CPS. You can ask them to keep it anonymous. They will try to work with teh family to find a better way to discipline.<br><br>
-Heather
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top