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My dad is circed and my little brother isn't, and I don't think it was ever even NOTICED by bro until he went to school and saw other kids his own age naked. Cut or uncut seems like a huge difference to us, but little kids don't have that preconception. My brother says he was never teased about it, and we come from a conservative rural area where most kids are circed.

Your 4 y.o. ds may or may not notice that the baby's penis looks different than his (after all, it will be tiny, and *everything* about an infant's body seems very different than a toddler's body), but if he does notice, I think that pointing out that his penis is like Daddy's will avert any potential discomfort. As for ds2, I'd just tell him, when he asks, which may not be for years, that they "changed the rules" or "started doing it a new way" between ds1 and his birth.

This is a big deal to adults, but IME, not to kids. If they aren't taught to think it's important then they just don't think so.
 
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