[wi_pinecone]

My daughter Indigo is scheduled to have eye muscle surgery. The date for that is the wednesday after thanksgiving. I need some help coping
with this.

Specifically, I have requested that I am allowed to be present when Indigo wakes up from the anesthesia. At first, I was told that children are taken to the recovery room and when they wake up a nurse comes to get the parents. I want be there when she wakes up, so that she isn't scared or confused, and that the faces of her mom & dad be the first thing
she sees. They tell me this isn't possible. I have been very pushy (while trying to stay respectful) about this. They have come back and said that instead, they won't take her to recovery, they'll keep her in the operating room until she is just waking and then they will bring her to me and we can sit together in the discharge (?) room, where she can have apple juice and crackers before we go home. I'm quite skeptical of this. It still sounds like
she'll be waking without me.

I feel like they really aren't allowing me to do what I feel is best for my
child and just changing the words around so that it seems like it is more of what I want. I understnd the type of anesthetic that they'll be giving her is one that isn't very long lasting. I have the impression that once the actual surgery is done they bring her out of it and wake her up. But this is where I want to be--when she wakes up!

Thoughts, advice, experience..? I'm all ears.

~ Denise

:

 

[TiredX2]

I would push it, honestly. Have you asked their concerns? I mean, they allow family in during c-sections, so it's obiouvsly not impossible, kwim?

I remember getting my tonsils out when I was 8 and waking and being *sooo* disoriented and desperately needing a drink of water (or something) and being basically too weak to get anyones attention and just waiting.... if my mom or dad would have been there (of if there was someone watching *just* me) it would have been a lot better.

 

[KC in KS]

I was 30+ for my last surgery, and that waking up-disoriented-in pain-alone feeling was really scary for me! I'm usually pretty self-sufficient, too. No way I'd let an eight year old do it.

 

[chiedza]

My DS has had to go under 6 times and this is the rule at our hospital, too. I don't know why, but I know they get me the SECOND he wakes up because I can hear him from the waiting room! They also give him something before the surgery to make him "forget" going under and waking up. So, after the fact, he's not upset we weren't there when he opened his eyes.

C-sections are different because the person doesn't have general anesthesia (I think).

 

[virgo mommy]

My DD had surgery when she was 6, and i tried and tried but they would not let me go with her or be there when she woke up and it just broke my heart!

They did come and get me asap when she woke, but she was already very disoriented and scared. BUT she did not remember any of it, not even that same day....I would really push it to be with her, BUT if you can't it will be ok!!

 

[maya44]

They don't want you there because they have to ensure that she is waking up properly. If she is not there are some agressive actions they would need to take and they don't want you "to be in the way"

You can try to push it, but most hospitals will not bend on this one.

 

[MomBirthmomStepmom]

I understand your concerns and wants (my DD had surgery for a kidney problem at 10 months old), but there are most likely good reasons for the rules, and they're probably in place for the health and safety of your child (and the others in their care), like the PP said..

I was lucky, and we met them moving DD into her recovery room in the hallway, she was still asleep, but would blink her eyes a bit. She slept pretty much the entire day/night too, so didn't REALLY wake up until the next morning. She was so sleepy and out of it...

If you feel like you need to, try to push it, but don't get angry if they don't budge. It WILL be okay... *hugs*

 

[pinecone]

I really appreciate everyone's thoughtful insights into this issue. I'm feeling a little bit better about it. I guess just realizing this is out of my control helps me to realize I must accept it.

Once again, thanks.

~ Denise

:

 

[oceanbaby]

Have you talked directly with the surgeon? My ds had his tonsils out not long ago, and I felt strongly about being there when he woke up. I talked with his surgeon about this before the surgery, and he said he would come to get me as soon as the surgery was finished and then take me into the recovery room. He said that the only chance that ds would wake up without me was if he were to wake up while being transferred from surgery to recovery.

I seem to remember the hospital staff not being overly accomodating when I mentioned it to them. Something about parents freaking out and getting in the way of the nurses doing their job should there be any problems. But true to his word the surgeon came to get us immediately after surgery and we were in recovery long before ds woke up.

 

[Nickarolaberry]

My dd1 had eye muscle surgery (to correct strabismus) when she was just over 3 years old. She is a high needs kid, very emotionally attached and tends toward anxiety which can become extreme in challenging situations.

I was there with her until she went in for the surgery and they came to get me just as she was coming out of the anesthesia. She wasn't fully awake yet, but she was very belligerent and weepy. I held her on the bed for a good hour or so. She was no longer nursing at that point (had just weaned) but we had a sippy cup with chocolate milk in it and she sort of "nursed" with that (I held her in the nursing position while she drank it).

She was in and out of it all day long afterward, but after the next day no major ill effects. Some mood swings for about a week.

Her eye is fine now by the way!
Good luck!

 

[AmazoniaBelly]

My Daughter had surgery for urachus (bladder remains connected to belly button after birth) . I couldn't be with her when she woke up. They brought her in after she woke up and she was really mad. She was only six weeks old..and starving! She couldn't drink milk for 4 hours after surgery. My Partner and I stayed with her in a family room in the hospital for nearly a week. I guess I do have a few tips for you :

1. Ask your doctor where the IV will go...that is something you will want to be prepared for emotionally so that you can support your daughter.

2. Even if the nurses or staff piss you off...stay positive...

I am sorry that you have this ahead of you. Good luck.

 

[pinecone]

Thanks so much. The point you make about the mood swings is what I've heard from someone else. We don't give our dd additives or food colorings etc. so I'm especially concerned that that the anesthsia will have lasting effects.

Thanks for your support.
~ Denise