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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DD is ~2.5. She used to love classes like music and gym, and thought that playing in groups was fun. Now, over the past couple of months, she has gotten to the point where classes and group play are way too stimulating. She doesn't want to participate in class, just clings to me. And when there is a lot of commotion with other kids, she gets super grabby and angry and hoards toys when otherwise she's the kid who will make sure that everyone has what they want. It all just seems so out of character. In all of those situations, I try to give her lots of one on one attention, and we frequently take breaks. We talk ahead of time about what it will be like where we are going, and she has the ability to tell me when she needs a break from the action.<br><br>
I guess I'm posting this here in GD because I'd like to continue to take a gentle, supportive approach. Why is it an issue? I guess because it makes me sad to see my otherwise happy kid be the only one not having fun in a class or in a group. She is a totally joyful kid otherwise- loves playing at home with mom and dad and even a friend, but she used to love to go out and about in the world and participate in stuff. I know that she is still getting something out of the classes because she's excited about going and does all the stuff at home. When we're in a busy public place, she won't leave my side (she used to be wild!) and hates for people to talk to her or call attention to her.<br><br>
Is this a phase? Is this who she is? Should I do something or just be there for her? Does this have anything to do with #2 due soon? She's otherwise less clingy (at home, etc). I just feel down that my kid isn't happy doing things that she used to love.<br><br>
Thanks for reading all of this!
 

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It sounds like she is coping with new challenges (not that the class has changed, but she has, as her development has spurred her forward). If she is still excited about the class, but not always participating well, is that a problem? If things were continue as they are, would this pose a problem for her, you, or the teacher?
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks for responding. She was actually much better in gym this week. Right now she *hates* it when she feels like people are looking at her, so I just steered her away from the crowded spots (which I've been doing a while, so it wasn't a silver bullet or anything). Maybe she was just in a more excitable mood. DH takes her to music and said that it was same as it has been lately. I think it really bums him out. It used to be a really fun thing that they did together, and now she doesn't love it anymore. It's more of a circle/group thing and it's just too much being in the spotlight for her.<br><br>
It's not a problem for the class or teacher so much, but DH and I both miss seeing our kid be happy. It's hard to have the only kid in class who isn't running, jumping, singing, participating. I'd take a break from classes, but she really gets excited to go and talks about them afterwards, so it seems unfair to just pull her out. We just want to do what's right for her and aren't really sure what to do....
 

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My dd is 34 mos. old and just started doing the same thing. She's still very involved in group activities if they are structured, but in free play my once very nice, shy girl now grabs, shoves, and hits. She started the hitting after another child hit her a week earlier. I think it's just the age. She enjoys going still, looks forward to it. We talk about good manners in the car on the way there and she still does it. No impulse control yet. On the way home she'll talk about how she hit so-and-so and how they got sad. So she's slowly getting it. I'm thinking she'll outgrow this in a few months.<br><br>
Darshani
 
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