[minkajane]

I know this isn't really related to this forum, but I figured that you ladies would be able to help me with this issue.

DH has mild sleep apnea. He's slightly overweight and snores, sometimes so much that I have to kick him out of the bed to go sleep in the other room with DS. This past week, his sleeping's been really bad. Last night, I went to bed at 11 and left him sitting on the couch trying to cuddle DS to sleep. I got back up at 12 and he was asleep with the TV blaring and the (very bright) living room light on. He was so out that I had to go to the bottom of the stairs (about 10 feet from the couch) and SCREAM his name to wake him. I can understand how DS can sleep through all of that, but it's weird that it took so much for DH to wake up. He took DS up to bed and went back downstairs to clean up. I got up the next morning and he was asleep on the tiny loveseat this time, with the TV still blaring and the light on. He was on his back facing the light and I had to scream his name several times before he woke up.

In the mornings when he gets up, if he lays his head down on the couch to watch TV, he's asleep within 5 seconds. I have to wake him several times every morning. He usually falls asleep again after I leave and sleeps till I get home for lunch after 11. Half the time lately, he sleeps on the couch because he falls asleep downstairs. I have to be right near him screaming before he wakes up.

Does anyone else think this is weird? The doctor said his sleep apnea is very mild and said that the easiest way to treat it would be for him to lose weight. Try as I might, I can't get him to exercise, he gets McDonald's for dinner on his way to work three days a week, and he drinks 3-4 cups of coffee every day while I'm at work. So our only other option is having his tonsils and adenoids removed. I've tried for three months to get him to call for an appointment (the hospital here won't let me make one for him) for a follow-up consultation, but he keeps claiming to forget.

I know this is long, but does anyone have any tips for me to either help him sleep better or help him get treatment? TIA!

 

[thedevinemissm]

I'm betting that your DH is sleeping so well on the couch/chair b/c he is in an upright position. That helps open the airways and eases the apnea. Has he ever tried the "Breathe Right" strips??? They worked for my DH when he was having probs.

I don't know what to tell you about the surgery. I, personally, don't agree with it. The apnea is your DH's body's way of saying that something is wrong. You can cut out the symptoms, but not the problem of being overweight. I think you need to really sit down & have a heart-to-heart w/DH. Explain to him that he is not taking care of himself and you are truly worried.

Also, it sounds like he works nights?? I know that when my DH worked nights it was VERY difficult for him to keep things in balance. He needed to sleep more than when he worked days, his motabolism (sp?

: ) was screwed up, and generally he just couldn't get as much accomplished. He finally had enough and switched jobs. Is there any way that your DH can work days?

Good luck! I hope you get some more ideas...

 

[poppyqwn]

My Dh has pretty bad sleep apena. He has had it way before I even met him. He used to fall asleep *anywhere* if he sat down for more that 2 minutes. What got really scary was him falling asleep while he was driving. He went in for a sleep study evaluation and ended up on a CPAP machine. It has help tremendously. The snoring isn't nearly as bad, (we slept in seprate rooms for a few years because of it) he isn't nearly as tired, his mood is so much better, and most importantly he feels better on a regular basis. He isn't a canidate for the surgery, and he isn't over weight.

I don't know if I have any good advice for you since I just nagged and then got really scared after one of the guys he worked with him died when they fell asleep driving. His apena was severe enough they stopped his sleep study 1 hour into it and brought him the CPAP right then and there. Just tell him how concerned you are and just urge him to follow up.

 

[minkajane]

Poppy, the same thing happened to my FIL. They brought him the CPAP halfway through the study because it was so bad.

I don't think he's sleeping better on the couch than in the bed because he's no sitting up on the couch, he's laying down. I think that's just where he happens to be when he falls asleep. I've had a heart-to-heart with DH about his weight, but it hasn't helped because his mom died in May and he's still very stressed and depressed about it (with good reason!). He works evenings (until about 1:30am) on weekends only and usually a day or two during the week. I don't think it's the hours because even when he didn't work late, he still stayed up that late. He's a night owl. We tried the Breathe-Right strips and they didn't help because the problem's in his throat, not his nose.

I think that answered all the questions.

I'm going to talk to him tonight about exercising more and eating better. A McDonalds meal and coffee is often the only thing he'll eat all day. I work all day and go to school in the evenings, so there's not much I can do during the week, but I'm going to start getting him and DS out of the house on the weekends. He just bought roller blades and DS and I have a bike, so we can go on family rides together, or we can go to the park. We also have a zoo membership, so we can walk around the zoo together once a month or so.

Thanks all for your support and suggestions!

 

[BelovedK]

Moved to health and healing.