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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I replied to a thread in Fertility to ask a ?? Posting here as well: While trying to work out aspects in our marriage, one of which is my dh's low libido. (He lost a job, so he has money and stress issues, that's a given) What can he take, naturally to help give him a boost? I seem to want 'it' more than he does. So just looking for a shove in the right direction. He needs to take a multivitamin, I know this. He eats horribly and does not get enough sleep.(too much video games) Yes, I am giving attention to other things. I know it's just a part of the Big Picture. But ladies, if you know of anything, please let me know. Gettin' real lonely here. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/confused.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Confused">:<br>
Thanks!<br>
sorry! how in the world did I double post?!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/duh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="duh">
 

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There's a great book on men's health called Thriving - maybe you can find it at your library. If I get a chance later, I will look and see if has anything about libido but it has some really great info. I got it for my dd a few years ago.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thank you, cathe. I was going to take ds to the library today anyway. And thanks for clearing up the double post, lol!
 

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Bulgarian Tribulus. Herbal supplement. Makes any man stand to attention in a stiff wind. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/jammin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="jammin">
 

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I read your post on ttc, as well as this one. Is your dh on board with the having another baby idea? If not, it may add to his stress. The stress is what you need to address before worrying about the libido, since that is what is causing the problem. Rather than going straight for the damiana, you might want to look into some stress-reducing ideas like: personal space (when my dh is down, he likes to be left alone for a while to do whatever) more sleep, exercise, massage, multivitamin with lots of B vitamins in it, making nutritious meals and stocking up on good snacks and things, if you could get him to take herbs, look into St. John's Wort, Lemon Balm, Oatstraw, Hawthorn, Motherwort, Siberian Ginseng, Ashwaganda, Astragalus, Licorice.....they'd be taken different ways, I know there is a St. John's Wort protocol out there somewhere. The other ones could go in an infusion, or perhaps a syrup.<br><br>
Good luck....
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"> my man's just getting his libido back! it's most pleasant...<br><br>
but your post is so similar to my experience i have to add my two cents (not so different from what others have said). my dh's initial reaction to the stresses of debt, super busy & demanding new job, and impending parenthood was to play @#!** videogames ALL of his spare time - it drove me absolutely mad - not only was he not in any way looking after himself, but this man who i loved and had been so excited to have a child with had basically abandoned me to the experience, lonely and frustrated... grrr..<br><br>
it was a honeymoon after our son was born, and a baby soon helped him realize that he couldn't hide plugged into a computer, but it's taken almost a year and a half for him to really start looking after himself again. as much as i totally understand your desire for a quick fix (if i could have slipped in some magic herbal tea i would have!), i think our sexual energy is too complicated for that - if it doesn't stem from a positive & healthy place then i think it can be very draining.<br><br>
stress is individual, but these really helped dh get some rosy cheeks!<br>
-start gardening (a hobby he loves & it's outdoors)<br>
-go to our chinese herbalist for stress/exhaustion tonics (very recommended!)<br>
-get some debt consolidated, $$ stuff sorted out<br>
-go on small cheap camping holidays as a family<br>
-have a little health crisis (thought he was getting an ulcer) to motivate a change in diet & coffee/smokes<br>
-work on a 5yr plan for us & work & dreams, etc.<br><br>
a weak but growing libido is much easier to accept and nurture when your sweetie is trying to make healthier choices... but it is very frustrating when they are playing video games with their meagre energy!!<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"> cheers to you and yours! the love life will return!!
 

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I agree with the other posts that this is probably an indication of a bigger problem. However, if you just need some lovin' (don't we all?) Maybe try foods like blueberries or mangos or raw oysters, or burning incense or using massage oil with scents like vanilla or poucholi (sp?). What works best for me when I feel like it's been a while and I want things spiced up is to tell dh about the naughty dreams I have at night...in explict detail (real dreams or fantasies) and touch him lightly on the arm or knee--I let him take it from there. I always thought that men were supposed to be the ones chasing the chicks around all the time trying to get some, but apparently marriage and children change things in that department. Just let him know that you want him and never EVER say anything about how you think his sex drive is low.
 

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The best "remedy' for a low libido is exercise!! Especially cardio and strength training. It gets the blood flowing/improves circulation, increases oxygen to the cells, improves metabolism, increases Chi, and boosts immunity...<br><br>
After exercise I would say diet. Avoiding a lot of saturated fat, avoid greasy foods, eat a balanced diet of healthy low-fat protiens, essential oils, complex carbs, and lots of vegis... Eat a colorful, high fiber diet.<br><br>
There are herbs and supplements that can help w/ libido issues in men~ Tribulis Terrestis, Ginseng (results seen when taken for a longer period), Hemp Oil, Avena Sateva, Fo Ti... I also think added green foods could be beneficial. Such as, Spirulina, Blue-Green Algea, Wheat Grass, Barley Grass, etc<br><br>
Yet, stress is an important factor to adress!!! Exercise will help with that. As well as outdoor walks, stress relieving exercises such as yoga and tai chih, meditation, massage, shiatsu, acupuncture, personal time for enjoyment, etc...<br><br>
You could also try to "boost his mood' by using essential oils in the home, especially bedroom. Bring fresh flowers in the bedroom, spray the sheets w/ a linen spray made of a few drops of each lavender, rose, and jasmine oil in a spray bottle of water, try wearing some neroli oil on your body.<br><br>
Another idea would be to try some feng shui for romance enhancement. Practically every feng shui "how to" book has a section on love and romance. Lots of good tips!!<br><br>
Good luck.
 
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