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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Without initially planning it, we all cosleep. Since DS (7mos) is crawling and almost went off the bed, DH said "All the more reason to put him in his own crib now." He also recently asked me "So how long do you plan on doing this?" "This" referring to co-sleeping." I told him I don't know, but that right now he wakes a lot in the night so I'm not changing anything.

He's not AGAINST cosleeping. But he isn't really FOR it either. We didn't plan it, but we do it for convenience. I'm will not wake up and get out of bed several times a night and stay awake to try to get a baby back into a crib and stay asleep. I don't want to be sleep deprived like that. Besides, I really like cuddling with my DS in bed now. I don't want to stop co-sleeping. Besides, its so wasy. So what do I do when DH has resistance?
 

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If he really wants DS in the crib, agree to do it one night with the idea that DH will get up to get him each time. Afterall, you don't have to get up at all while cosleeping and you don't want to use the crib. If he would even go for that, he wouldn't be to happy after a night like that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
That's a good idea. So he would have to get him out from the crib and bring him to me to nurse? And put him back, right? Which would involve DS waking up and having to start all over again. Maybe I should have to make him not only get DS but STAY up with me as I nurse to really get a feel for what its like. That is such a good idea. Thanks! If need be...I may just do that.

And trust me...my husband knows how affected I get from lack of sleep. He knows I am more well rested and therefore happier since we cosleep. I can't believe he would want to try to change that.

Any other ideas? Or info? Or advice?
 

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I honestly think that cosleeping is a family decision and hesitations about it should be worked out as a family. Not in the "you show him!!" kind of bitchy way.

Talk to your husband about your concerns about putting your child in his own crib. Hear your husbands concerns and address them if you can. Come up with some comprimise if you can. The decision to have a 'family bed' should be mutually and respectfully agreed upon. I don't think 'making' him get the child from his crib every night is practical or helpful to the situation.

JMHO.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
It wouldn't be in amean way. DH is a very practical, functional kind of guy. This type of experiment he would understand. And I know he doesn't want me exhausted because then I am not as happy during the day. I think he would get this.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by laurabelle1317 View Post
It wouldn't be in amean way. DH is a very practical, functional kind of guy. This type of experiment he would understand. And I know he doesn't want me exhausted because then I am not as happy during the day. I think he would get this.
I agree. I wouldn't suggest that being done in a mean way. My DH has a hard time walking in other people's shoes so sometimes I have to bash him ove the head figuratively so he can understand. This is the man who was telling people that DD3 was sleeping through the night because HE was sleeping through the night. I OTOH was dealing with a babe who was awake and nursing until 4 am for WEEKS.
 

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My DH was pretty hesitant when we coslept with our second child (poor DS#1 was deprived of cosleeping until he was a little older
). He wanted to boot DD out of our bed at 8 months, so I convinced him to at least let her be in our room in the crib. After we did that and I started getting no sleep because I would actually have to wake up to get DD and nurse her, he thought better of it and she came back to our bed.

This babe DH didn't even question it, in fact, he enjoys it, so there IS hope for you and your babe!

Shannon
 

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My husband having to get up and bring me my son every time he woke up to nurse was *why* we wound up starting to cosleep! I'd mentioned it before Bug was born, and he was very against the idea. So, part of our plan was that he'd get up and bring him to me (from the crib next to his side of the bed) whenever he woke up.

Then after a while of that *he* suggested cosleeping!
The crib is now in what will, someday, be the baby's room when he's ready for it, and is used as a changing table, playpen, place to put the baby when he's fussy and I'm wiped out from it (it has a mobile and a couple toys he only sees there and a chair next to it for me to sit in, I do not CIO) and we wish we hadn't bought the thing to start with!

So I agree with PPs... if he wants your son in a crib, let him make it work, have the crib in your room, so on.

Our son is also 7 months old and also starting to crawl off the bed. We have the mattress on the floor and I am working on teaching him how to get off the bed. if he does crawl off, he doesn't go far and lands on pillows. So far he's found it much less upsetting to crawl off the bed than he finds it to topple over backwards from a sitting position


Actually, right now we're planning to move the bed against walls in a corner. I've been pretty clear with my husband that I want to cosleep until Bug is old enough to want his own bed and so far he's not arguing much.

I think part of his willingness is knowing that he'd have to go back to waking up and getting my son every time he woke up instead of just switching sides with me the way he does now!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by D_McG View Post
I honestly think that cosleeping is a family decision and hesitations about it should be worked out as a family. Not in the "you show him!!" kind of bitchy way.

Talk to your husband about your concerns about putting your child in his own crib. Hear your husbands concerns and address them if you can. Come up with some comprimise if you can. The decision to have a 'family bed' should be mutually and respectfully agreed upon. I don't think 'making' him get the child from his crib every night is practical or helpful to the situation.

JMHO.
I agree with this. My DH was very hesitant about cosleeping at first, so we compromised and Evan slept with us only part of the night. Then, once he had a chance to read some literature, ask some questions, and give himself a chance to be on board with it - we are now cosleeping full time and my husband actually told ME to give the crib away to a charity or whatever, since we clearly won't need it with future children.

Compromise, work WITH him, and you guys will find a situation that works for everyone involved. It's not a family bed if half of the family is resentful of it.
 
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