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DS is 15 days old. We got an arm's reach co sleeper before he was born. But it's too short (we haven't gotten the leg extenders) and quite frankly I just feel better if DS is next to me because then I know that I can wake up immediately if he needs something. Plus I like having his squirmy little self cuddled up next to me. Anyway, DH just asked me if I'm ever going to use the co sleeper (right now I'm using it for pillow storage because I haven't figured out the side lying thing... and I have all my pillows that I use to prop me up for nursing right there within "arm's reach" <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> I told DH that I really like having DS in bed with us... but that I do realize it's his bed, too. I asked him how he felt about it, and he said that we have the co sleeper and the crib, but we're not using them. So I asked how he sees the night time situation working out. He said that he thinks once ds is sleeping through the night without needing to nurse, that we should transition him into the crib. That's fine... but I didn't know if DH realized that this can happen at different ages for different kids or that growth spurts/teething/etc can change things for a child who has started sleeping through the night. I also asked what his definition of sleeping through the night is (a full 8 hours? 4? 5?). Basically, DH just doesn't want the co sleeping thing to be permenant. I can respect that. It's his bed, too. Plus, I don't think I want cosleeping to be permenant. But I guess I'm just not ready to start putting limits on it. I'm really just enjoying it right now... I mean waking up to nurse at night is no picnic when I'm tired, but I figure that it's A LOT better than having to drag myself into another room once he's screaming to deal with a baby who's too frustrated to nurse well and then with a baby who's too wound up to go back to sleep quickly. I fully realize that I'm definitely getting more sleep co-sleeping than I would if DS were in his crib. Plus I know that CIO just isn't an option (Even if I didn't think it was cruel, I don't think my mama instincts would let me do that to my little boy).<br><br>
Anyway, what can I say to DH to help reassure him that I'm not going to ignore what he wants? But at the same time, I also want him to see the value in co-sleeping and to enjoy spending that time with our child.
 

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Your baby is just barely 2 weeks old. I don't think you need to make any permanent decisions now. Just go with the flow and do what feels right and works to get you all the most sleep!<br><br>
That said, you should talk to you DH about his expectations. Many children still wake to nurse at a year old and beyond. He needs to know that that is normal and expected now, so you're not fighting about it later.<br><br>
HTH! baby's up
 

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Your babe is so new that you really jst have to do what works. Bt I think you're drawing far too black-and-white a comparison between babe in bed and babe cio'ing in a crib. He doesn't have to be in your bed to not be screaming alone somewhere.<br><br>
For me babe in co-sleeper is not that different from babe in bed in that I wake up long before she's all the way awake and can begin feeding long before there's so much as a whimper. And that without ever getting out of bed - it's great. (But I have to get ot of bed to change her anyway, or else she gets way too wet at night.)<br><br>
FOR ME co-sleeping with a squirmer was hell. If I never get kicked in the gut again, I'll have had my life's fill. The AR is a good compromise. I can see, hear, and touch dd all night withot getting up, and mornings are so sweet with her right there, but hallelujah I can actually sleep.<br><br>
We intend to transition when it stops working or when she has physically outgrown the AR, whichever comes first. (And that may be to her crib in our room or to her crib in her room, depending on when that is.)<br><br>
So I am a big fan of the AR and think it is lovely for bonding, but like I said, you have to do what works for all of you. It's different enough from the family bed to make having her in our room tolerable for me, and it's close enough that we find nighttime baby care convenient (I won't ever say it's easy).
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>shanniesue2</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10771365"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">He said that he thinks once ds is sleeping through the night without needing to nurse, that we should transition him into the crib.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">:<br><br>
Sounds great! Tell him that my dd (by all definitions a "good" sleeper- always has been) didn't consistently sleep an 8 hour stretch until 3 yrs old.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
And I don't see any reason to make more work and less sleep for yourself getting out of bed every night...<br><br>
-Angela
 

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Tell him that you'll stop cosleeping when it stops working for your family. When we first started cosleeping, DH said maybe we'd do it until 6 months. Well, DS will be 6 months next week and I know none of us plan on stopping any time soon. DH works really long hours during the day and I think he loves snuggling with the baby at night. If/when the situation becomes undesirable for one of us we can discuss changing it, but I don't think that will be any time soon.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>SollysMom</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10771876"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Tell him that you'll stop cosleeping when it stops working for your family. When we first started cosleeping, DH said maybe we'd do it until 6 months. Well, DS will be 6 months next week and I know none of us plan on stopping any time soon. DH works really long hours during the day and I think he loves snuggling with the baby at night. If/when the situation becomes undesirable for one of us we can discuss changing it, but I don't think that will be any time soon.</div>
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dh too! he said 2 months, 6 months and now he's saying 2 years :p I'm guessing we'll just go until she wants out lol.<br><br>
As for the cosleeper, ours was a complete waist of money. I used it for like 1 week before we decided to move teh crib next to me. I didn't try it until she was 4 mo when she was moving all over like a crazy baby and we kept wakign eachother up. The crib is MUCH easier. I would recomend doing that. The arms reach was hard to get the baby in and out of. But really, at 2 weeks dd didn't want to sleep unless she was smashed against my body some how <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 
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