Ex and I have a 28month old ds together and weve been split since he was a year old. Last month we started occasional overnights and last night was the second one. Ex has a girlfriend who he met in July and they got serious pretty quickly and are currently in the throes of love. <img alt="eyesroll.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/eyesroll.gif">: When overnights started I was clear with ex that his gf was not to spend the night. He said he told her and she was disappointed but understood. Gf and I had lunch last week and she is very nice, we have alot in common... whatever. I picked ds up this morning and it was obvious that gf had spent the night. I sat down to nurse ds and I told them both that I was uncomfortable with her sleeping over there and thought it was inappropriate. I was surprised because i told ex this and he said he thought I meant with her sleeping in the bed with them. I said it should have been a given that that is completely out of line and that I meant at all. (He is full of it and I know he knew what I meant but im not surprised he is pulling this.) She is welcome to stay late but needs to go home to sleep. They said they thought it was no big deal, ds had fun she slept on the couch.... and that I was just making a fuss. I said that I felt that neither of us should have opposite sex overnight guests and that most child psych and dev specialists would agree. I pointed out that they've only even know each other 5months and that while they are committed to one another that its still very new. Overnights alone are just getting started. I didn't say this but if ex wants more I need see him doing this on his own and she is always there! And when shes not he comes to my house and they watch tv the whole time or he is calling me asking when im coming home. Anyway I felt bad and my voice was shaking and I made sure to tell gf that it wasn't her i think she is wonderful but I'm not comfortable with it and I even said at least not yet. I would not have an issue with them living together but until more time has gone by.... ex still thought that as long as ds seemed fine he didn't see the problem and I said even if he is fine now what if something happens between them? He asked gf what she thought and she said you guys are the parents which made we wish I had waited to talk to just ex but I still feel like it was good to tell her how I felt. And also, if ex needs me to be the bad guys because he cant stand up to her thats fine. Ex insinuated that i was being jealous and controlling and I said that I didn't think I was and that my talking calmly with both of them should prove that. I said I really felt that this was a reasonable request. Especially since its only 1 to 2 nights a month at this point. So.... am I being unreasonable? Do I need to pick my battles and let this one go? I left it at obviously I can't stop them from doing whatever they want but that I hoped they would respect this request. I hope that even if he isnt respectful that she might be or she how he is not...