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My partner and I are talking about seperating and I know it is affecting our daughter. I haven't told her we are talking about this... however she can easily sense the change in moods when he comes home.
One thing that has worked for me is giving her a safe space to let out feelings. We do this mostly through talking where I will notice she sad/angry/whatever and ask her about it. Usually she will say yes she is and start talking about it which leads to crying or asking me questions which I do try to answer.
I have found that waiting for her to bring it up is much more effective- in fact she seems confused when I initiate this type of conversation.
One book that has helped me is "How to talk so your kids will listen and listen so you kids will talk."
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