[aquarius aspiring]

<p>I wasn't sure what forum to put this thread in, but since my nephew is eight years old, I figured The Childhood Years might be a good place to start.</p>
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<p>My brother and former SIL were both teenagers when their son was born. His mom grew up quickly, but my brother did not and he and FSIL are now divorced. My brother does not spend any time with his son unless my parents or I initiate the contact.</p>
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<p>I'm wondering if there's anything I can do to help my nephew and/or influence him in positive ways. I take him out for the day when I can. The last time was during the summer and it was for his birthday. I took him to the mall for a birthday present and then to the county fair. When he's at my house, I try to keep him away from video games (he plays them all the time at home) and take him outside or we bake brownies or do some other activity. I like to spend one-on-one time with him because his mom is busy with two young children. He also doesn't get to experience a lot of extra activities because of lack of money. He's back in school and I work on the weekends, so I can only take him out after school on Thursdays or Fridays (my days off). My goal is to spend time with him once or twice a month.</p>

 

[snoopy5386]

<p>I think what you are doing is awesome and you should keep it up. Perhaps keep him for a couple of days when he has a school vacation that aligns with your day off. It's too bad that your brother doesn't realize what a blessing he has in his son.</p>

 

[thefreckledmama]

<p>I agree, you're doing everything you can do yourself.  My brother was 16 when his son was born, and only now 9 years later at 27 is he finally being a pro-active father to him going as far as filing for custody after finding out that his mom and mom's boyfriend have been neglectful and likely abusive.  My SIL's brother didn't ever see his son until he was 10 or 11 (possibly a little younger), and now he sees him all the time, and is a huge part of his life.  </p>
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<p>I guess that's just my long winded way of saying you should just keep doing what you're doing, and that's it's totally possible that one of these days your brother will come around and decide to be an active part of your nephew's life.  Until then, just keep an eye on what goes on with his homelife.  I would be afraid of any child living with or being left in the care of an adult that was so drunk they peed in the bed-and I would have my eyes and ears open for any signs of abuse that would need to be reported. </p>